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Longing for the Feminine: Reflections on Love,Sexual Orientation,Individuation, and the Soul
Authors:Diane Eller-Boyko  Fran Grace
Abstract:This article is a collaboration that represents several years of dialogue about our topic, alongside the individual depth work done by each of us to overcome the negativities that often poison collaborations and feeling connections: envy, enmeshment, and passivity. It is the unique expression of two women working together in a co-creative process pulsed by feminine principles. Diane is a Jungian analyst and has spent her life close to the unconscious. Fran is a writer, educator, and lifelong student of mystical paths. The article gives an account of Diane's longing for the divine feminine and the particular meaning it has for her as a lesbian in this time of global upheaval. In particular, her story highlights the psychic suffering that individuals go through when their same-sex attractions and love orientation are judged as psychologically “immature” or religiously “sinful.” Neither Christian-based “conversion therapy” nor Jungian analysis turned Diane into a heterosexual woman. Her story reveals the benefit of Jung's depth psychology even as it underscores the singularity of every person's individuation process. The article's unusual format is a tandem of Diane's first-person sharing of her soul's journey and Fran's witnessing of the journey's profound significance. We found that both voices were needed. Truth requires not only the one who lives a journey with courage but also the one who witnesses it with a loving heart. Ultimately, we see the personal journeys of gays and lesbians as significant to the larger context of the evolution of human consciousness.
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