Becoming irreplaceable: How comparisons to the partner’s alternatives differentially affect low and high self-esteem people |
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Authors: | Sandra L Murray Sadie Leder Jennifer CD MacGregor John G Holmes Rebecca T Pinkus Brianna Harris |
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Institution: | aUniversity at Buffalo, The State University of New York, Department of Psychology, Park Hall, Buffalo, NY 14260-4110, United States;bPsychology Department, University of Waterloo, Waterloo, Ontario, Canada N2L 3G1 |
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Abstract: | It is proposed that people are motivated to feel hard to replace in romantic relationships because feeling irreplaceable fosters trust in a partner’s continued responsiveness. By contrast, feeling replaceable motivates compensatory behavior aimed at strengthening the partner’s commitment to the relationship. A correlational study of dating couples and two experiments examined how satiating/thwarting the goal of feeling irreplaceable differentially affects relationship perception and behavior for low and high self-esteem people. The results revealed that satiating the goal of feeling irreplaceable increases trust for people low in self-esteem. In contrast, thwarting the goal of feeling irreplaceable increases compensatory behaviors meant to prove one’s indispensability for people high in self-esteem. |
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Keywords: | Relationships Perceived acceptance Self-esteem |
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