Integrating the Relational Matrix: Attachment Style,Differentiation of Self,Triangulation, and Experiential Avoidance

In light of the recent call for greater efforts toward integration in psychotherapy theory, research, and practice (Gaete and Gaete in J Psychother Integr 25(2):158–174, 2015; Ziv-Beiman in J Psychother Integr 24(3):251–257, 2014), this study aimed to evaluate the relationships among attachment style, differentiation of self (DoS), triangulation, and experiential avoidance in an integrated model. Although attachment theory (Bowlby in Attachment and loss. Attachment, vol 1. Basic Books, New York, 1969; Cassidy and Shaver in Handbook of attachment: Theory, research, and clinical applications, 3rd edn. Guilford Press, New York, 2010) typically views relationships in terms of dyads, Bowen theory and other systemic theories focus on human relationships in terms of triangles, indicating that attachment theory may be overlooking the role of a second parent in psychological well-being. Furthermore, links between attachment theory and DoS (Kerr and Bowen in Family evaluation. W. W. Norton and Company, New York, 1988) may be characterized by the avoidance of painful private experience, termed experiential avoidance. A sample of 167 U.S. students enrolled at an urban Midwestern University filled out electronic surveys containing a demographic questionnaire and the Differentiation of Self Inventory-Short Form, the Triangular Relationship Inventory, the Experiences in Close Relationships Scale, and the Acceptance and Action Questionnaire—II (AAQ-II). We found that experiential avoidance partially mediated the relationships between avoidant attachment and emotional cut-off, as well as between anxious attachment and I-position. In addition, both anxious and avoidant attachment were associated with higher levels of triangulation and fully mediated the relationship between triangulation and DoS, suggesting that dyadic relationship patterns originate in triadic family processes and eventually effect DoS. Overall, these results connect the dyadic parent–child relationship, the central construct of attachment theory, to the triadic field of Bowen and other systemic theories.