Grandiosity,trauma and self

Distortions and inversions of Kohut's phase of grandiosity play a major role in multi-generational patterns of child-abuse and neglect. Such families are considered ‘upside down’ in their organization: parents enact unmet needs for mirroring and grandiose assertion, while the child experiences anxiety and endures a split between defensive compliance and a turbulent, trauma-ridden inner life. Within the space of this lonely inner life, the child fixates on atavistic power fantasies and dreams of possessing or controlling its objects. Hence, distortions of power and grandiosity replicate themselves from one generation to the next. The therapeutic play of children from upside down families typically passes through four phases: 1) re-enactment of trauma vignettes; 2) restoration of appropriate grandiose and mirroring themes; 3)restoration of rudimentary empathic abilities and empathy longing; 4) the search for an appropriate parenting object. Psycho-analytically based play therapy is effective when combined with other interventions to stabilize the child's milieu.