| Abstract: | Problems arise in marital relationships when any of the following conditions are not met: first, that the couple have correspondence of their beliefs, or rules, as to what behaviors constitute “value messages” or “devalue messages”; second, that they depend primarily upon nonpainful channels for sending and receiving value messages; and third, that each partner's required quota of value messages from the other be of a reasonable quantity, not inflated by unrealistic fear of abandonment or devaluation. Problems in any of these areas may present in a variety of seemingly disparate fashions. Each of these problems is amenable to cognitive restructuring strategies. Different demands are placed on the therapeutic alliance and the marital alliance by the elucidation of each of these three types of problems; proper timing of interventions is therefore necessary. |
