The Concept of Collusion: A Combined Systemic-Psychodynamic Approach to Marital Therapy

The author presents some new theoretical aspects and therapeutic implications of the concept of Couples in Collusion, (22), first published in 1975. According to this concept, the emotional attraction in the selection of a mate is based on a fascinating, mutual, and alarming theme, shared by both partners in order to be mastered together. The partners unavowedly start colluding to compensate for former frustrations and to repress fears of intimacy. After some time of living together and in defense of repressed feelings, they may enter into an escalation of the dysfunctional interactional pattern. Experience shows that severely neurotic personalities don't necessarily start colluding, provided that their partners don't gratify regressive needs or reinforce their defenses but help to cope with the frustrations of these unfulfilled regressive wishes. Therapies based on the concept of collusion aim at the improvement of intradyadic and extradyadic boundaries and the depolarization of extreme progressive-regressive behavior. These goals can be reached by both systemic and psychodynamic techniques. The concept of collusion may serve as a guide for this therapeutic process.     

The Significance of Romantic Love for Marriage

In this study, 605 subjects were asked about romantic love and marriage. Married people differentiated themselves from single people with stable partners and divorced people with new partners by more frequently living together with their great love, more reciprocity in that love, and less disappointments in love relationships prior to the current relationship; but they also described themselves as less happy and satisfied than the single and divorced respondents, particularly with regard to tenderness, sex, and conversation with their partners. Independent of marital status, those who were greatly in love with their partners describe themselves as happier. Love at first sight, relative to a gradually developing love, nevertheless, did not have a worse prognosis for happiness in marriage. Being in love seems to be of greater importance for the prognosis of the marriage than marital happiness and satisfaction.