Cross‐cultural similarities and differences in motives to forgive: A comparison between and within cultures

Recently, researchers have begun to explore people's motives to forgive those who have offended them. Using a recall method, we examined whether such motives (relationship‐, offender‐ or self‐focused) differ between and within cultures that are more collectivistic (Moluccan Islands in Indonesia) or more individualistic (the Netherlands) and whether this depends on people's relationship with the offender. More specifically, we examined the idea that other‐focused motives should be more important in cultures that are more collectivistic and that self‐focused motives should prevail in more individualistic cultures. We found that Moluccan participants indeed endorsed relationship‐ and offender‐focused motives more than Dutch participants. Moluccan and Dutch participants did not, however, differ in the extent to which they endorsed self‐focused motives. Furthermore, Dutch participants were more likely to endorse relationship motives (especially in close relations) than self‐focused motives. For Moluccan participants, relationship‐, offender‐ and self‐focused motives were equally important and also did not depend on how close they were with the offender. Differences between the samples could not be explained by the extent to which people defined themselves as more independent or interdependent. The implications of these findings for future research on forgiveness motives are discussed.     

We‐ness and the Cultivation of Wisdom in Couple Therapy

Wisdom has played a key role in the attempt to understand the positive nature of human behavior since the time of Aristotle. In the past decade, psychology and related fields have experienced an expanding interest in the empirical and theoretical pursuit of wisdom. The relational dimension of wisdom has received less attention, although it may be viewed as embedded in the practice of all couple therapists. This article integrates previous work on resilience and positive functioning in committed partnerships and proposes relational wisdom to be a master virtue of relationship development, one that can be cultivated across the lifespan of the partnership. The aspects of relational wisdom such as self‐reflection, attunement to self and other, balancing conflicting partner aims, the interpretation of rules and principles in light of the uniqueness of each situation and the capacity to learn from experience point to couples therapy as an ideal context for such skill building. Wisdom is built through dialog and the resulting individual and couple stories can serve as touchstones to what is most precious and vital in the relationship as well as guides for action through challenges and conflict. A clinical case is described to illustrate selected aspects of relational wisdom and implications for therapeutic practice.     

Narrative Therapy's Relational Understanding of Identity

We describe how we think of identity as relational, distributed, performed, and fluid, and we illustrate the use of this conceptualization within a narrative worldview. Drawing on the work of Michael White, we describe how this relational view of identity leads to therapeutic responses that give value to interconnection across multiple contexts and that focus on becoming rather than on being. We show how a narrative worldview helps focus on the relational, co‐evolving perspective that was the basis of our early attraction to family therapy. We offer detailed examples from our work of practices that help us stay firmly situated in a relational worldview that is counter to the pervasive influence of individualism in our contemporary culture.     

黑暗人格特质与知识共享敌意的关系：员工关系和人际信任的链式中介作用

为了考察黑暗人格、员工关系、人际信任与知识共享敌意之间的关系,研究基于“特质-心理状态-行为”模型,采用问卷对307名企业员工进行调查研究。结果表明：（1）黑暗人格能显著负向预测情感性关系,显著正向预测工具性关系和知识共享敌意;（2）情感性关系显著正向预测人际信任,人际信任显著负向预测知识共享敌意;工具性关系显著正向预测知识共享敌意;（3）情感性关系和人际信任在黑暗人格与知识共享敌意之间起链式中介作用;工具性关系在黑暗人格与知识共享敌意之间起中介作用。     

Young women with and without non-suicidal self-injury: A comparison of romantic relationship functioning

IntroductionThe interpersonal context of an individual struggling with non-suicidal self-injury (NSSI) is of critical importance.ObjectiveThe purpose of the current study is to offer, through a dyadic perspective, a unique portrait of the relevant indicators of romantic relationship functioning (i.e., romantic attachment, dyadic trust, dyadic coping, relationship satisfaction, and caregiving) that distinguish young women who have engaged in NSSI from those who have not.MethodParticipants consisted of 20 women who indicated having engaged in NSSI in the past six months and 20 women who indicated having never engaged in NSSI, along with their respective partner.ResultsResults revealed that women who engaged in NSSI were more likely to report subjective distress in the form of attachment anxiety and distrust, as well as lower relationship satisfaction and adaptive dyadic coping strategies, compared to women who had never engaged in NSSI. Findings also showed that partners of women who engaged in self-injury reported more attachment anxiety than partners of women who do not engage in NSSI.ConclusionThese results highlight the importance of romantic relationship dynamics and the potential associations with engagement in self-injurious behaviors, which has implications for the development of effective prevention and intervention strategies.     

The Big Five personality traits and perceptions of touch to intimate and nonintimate body regions

This investigation tested whether (1) the Big Five personality traits contribute to favorable perceptions of touch from a relational partner, (2) participants’ sex or personality better predicted positive perceptions of touch, and (3) perceptions of touch vary as a function of relationship satisfaction. A total of 305 participants aged 18–69 years completed self-report measures of reactions to touch, personality, and relationship satisfaction. Results showed that agreeableness was a significant predictor of positive perceptions of touch to both intimate and nonintimate body regions. Openness to experience was also a significant predictor in positive perceptions of touch to nonintimate body regions. Overall, personality was a stronger predictor of positive perceptions of touch than either biological sex or relationship satisfaction with the toucher.     

Optimal Strategies in Couple Therapy: Treating Couples Dealing with the Trauma of Infidelity

Infidelity is one of the most difficult problems to address in couple therapy, most likely because it involves a traumatic relationship event that alters the ways in which couples process information about each other and established behavioral patterns. This article presents a three-stage treatment designed to address the cognitive, behavioral, and emotional sequelae of affairs that integrates cognitive-behavioral and insight-oriented strategies with the literatures on traumatic response and forgiveness. Critical and unique features of this treatment are discussed and a case study is presented to illustrate the treatment methods.     

Reply to Aijaz and Weidler on Hiddenness

In this brief reply I argue that criticisms of the hiddenness argument recently published in this journal by Imran Aijaz and Markus Weidler are without force. As will be shown, their critique of my conceptual version of the argument misses the mark by missing crucial distinctions. Their critique of my analogical version of the argument misunderstands that argument and also misapplies the work of W. H. Vanstone. And their critique of my view that belief is necessary for a certain kind of relationship with God overlooks both some central features of that kind of relationship and some good reasons for not accepting acceptance or anything similarly nonbelieving as a substitute for belief in this context.     

Parents Perceived as Peers: Filial Maturity in Adulthood

Filial maturity refers to the adult offspring’s perception of parents as individuals with past histories and limitations. Three studies were conducted to measure filial maturity and its relational and developmental correlates. Study 1 included adults aged 18–59 to empirically assess filial maturity and its correlates across adulthood. Study 2 examined associations between filial maturity and constructs indicative of emerging adulthood (e.g., emotional autonomy), among people aged 18–24. Study 3 included young and middle-aged adults (N = 158; ages: 22–49) and their parents to assess associations between parents’ reports of relationship quality and offspring’s filial maturity. Offspring reported greater filial maturity with mothers and with parents with whom they reported greater relationship quality, closeness, and autonomy. Parents who reported greater relationship quality had offspring who reported greater filial maturity. Findings suggest that filial maturity is a dyadic phenomenon that influences parent child relationship quality across the lifespan.     

Effects of global and contextualized personality on relationship satisfaction

Researchers have made great strides in conceptualizing and assessing contextualized personality—how people’s personalities vary across different contexts (e.g., among friends, co-workers, and relationship partners). We investigated how global and contextualized personality traits are linked to relationship satisfaction. In Study 1, longitudinal associations between global and contextualized personality and relationship satisfaction were examined in a sample of adults in committed dating relationships. Study 2 investigated actor and partner effects of global and contextualized personality on relationship satisfaction in undergraduate couples. Study 3 used observer ratings of contextualized personality traits expressed in couples’ daily Instant Messages (IMs). These results demonstrate that contextualized personality—in particular neuroticism—is linked to the quality of both current and future romantic relationships.