Witch-mother is which? The potential role of the analyst in facilitating authentic motherhood

Abstract

This paper explores challenges in the treatment of women suffering from disturbances in maternal identification. A review of the psychoanalytic and developmental literature focuses on the frequent finding of early-onset mother–daughter relational disturbance involving maternal narcissistic fragility and exaggerated dependency needs, intergenerational trauma, and related psychopathology including mutual affect dysregulation. A case example of a young woman with a severe anxiety disorder is presented and discussed to illustrate the challenges to the traditional psychoanalytic technique. This patient avoided pregnancy into her late thirties and entered analysis with feelings of inauthenticity, characterological masochism, and a “secret mission” to unmask the witch recurring in her dreams. Through an elaborate working-through of negative maternal transference, the analyst and patient saw through the birth of the patient’s authentic self, a new approach to her career, her relationships with men, and her anticipation of the birth of a child by the sixth year of treatment. The author posits that psychoanalytic technique benefits from contemporary, attachment, and trauma research that supports the analyst’s playing a more active role in approaching, co-regulating, tolerating, and integrating avoided affects and memory traces that are associated with early-onset relational disturbances worsened by the effects of violence, maltreatment, and loss.     

The Primary Maternal Oedipal Situation and Female Homoerotic Desire

In this paper, I closely examine classical psychoanalytic theory on the female oedipal complex in order to shed light on same-sex object choice. Given that the mother is the first love object for the girl as well as for the boy, the girl's object relational constellation centrally involves the experience of homoeroticism as well as heteroeroticism. Yet, it remains a question as to whether a mother can see her daughter as a sexual subject; can mother–daughter homoerotic desire be experienced and validated by the mother? That a girl desires her mother is generally not seen or registered by the mother; it remains an unrecognized desire.

I suggest that the obscuring of female desire has to do centrally with the fate of eroticism in the early mother–daughter relationship. I propose relabeling the “negative oedipal complex” in girls as “the primary maternal oedipal situation.” Issues involving invisibility or stigmatization of one's erotic desire likely pose a significant challenge to the self–esteem of many lesbians. It is important in clinical work with lesbian patients to be open to a complex interweaving of developmental experiences, varying with each individual, some of which may have been damaging to, and others strengthening of, female sexuality.     

Sibling rivalry,separation, and change in Austen's Sense and Sensibility

The paper explores a process of growth represented in the interplay of Jane Austen's characterizations of Marianne and Elinor Dashwood in Sense and Sensibility, approaching the text through the lens of psychoanalytic theories on oedipal sibling rivalry, separation, and processes of change. A close reading of Sense and Sensibility tracks Marianne Dashwood's repudiation of any ‘second attachment’ as the surface of an unconscious fantasy, denying a rival for the mother's love. A psychoanalytic view contrasts Marianne's lack of separation from her mother, her use of denial and projection, and her near death after losing the man she loves, with her older sister Elinor Dashwood's capacities for depression, reflection, and greater acceptance of loss and separation. The narrative portrays Mrs. Dashwood's identification with and idealization of her daughter Marianne, which contribute to her oedipal sibling ‘victory’. In the language and structure of the novel, the projections, identifications, aggressions, and separations (conscious and unconscious) of the sisters in the vicissitudes of their adolescent loves and rivalries constitute a process of growth. Austen's novel brings to life, with the vividness and coherence of great literature, forces and fantasies in oedipal sibling rivalries, inspiring renewed attention to their subtle presence in the transference and countertransference of the psychoanalytic process.     

Mind the baby: The role of the nanny in infant observation

The influence of nannies and other significant caregivers on a child's psychological and emotional development may be profound and if unrecognized may contribute to psychopathology in adulthood. However, the significance of the nanny has been relatively neglected within the psychoanalytic literature. In this paper I will discuss the impact of early caregivers other than the biological mother on the psychic development of the child, and the role of the nanny within the family dynamics as a figure attracting powerful unconscious phantasies and unwanted projections. These ideas will be illustrated by a detailed account of a year‐long observation of an infant who had a succession of several different nannies in her first three months before her parents employed a more permanent nanny. It is proposed that the baby's emerging attachments to her two primary caregivers, mother and nanny, developed in parallel and influenced each other, with observable impact on her behaviour and developing personality. The paper concludes with a review of the place of infant observation within psychoanalytic training and how the experience of witnessing the earliest infant‐caregiver relationships in an extra‐analytic setting both refines understanding of developmental theory and builds a foundation for psychoanalytic practice.     

From Pathological Merger to a Reflective,Triangular Space: Parent-Infant Psychotherapy with a Mother with Borderline Personality Disorder

This article looks at Parent-Infant Psychotherapy work with a mother with Borderline Personality Disorder and her infant son. Mother had suffered a traumatic childhood and, when her son was born, withdrew into a delusion of merger with him, avoiding what she experienced as a violent, threatening and confusing world. Drawing on psychoanalytic and attachment-mentalization theories and neuroscientific and developmental research, this article explores mother’s difficulties in acknowledging her baby as a separate being, and the impact this had on baby, who was slowly turning toward an autistic way of functioning. The article discusses the therapeutic challenges in creating a reflective, triangular space where both mother’s and baby’s experiences could be thought about and understood. Finally, the author considers an interpretative stance that includes both mother’s and baby’s shared and their separate experiences.     

Attention Deficit Disorder,Anxiety Disorder,and Learning Disabilities

Abstract

This article details an individualized psychoeducational model designed to treat a child with interrelated psychological and developmental issues whose psychic functioning was deteriorating within the traditional educational system. The team had leeway to function outside of the educational system to create an individualized, remedial, psychoeducational program. At the time we began the program, her diagnostic picture included: Anxiety Disorder, Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder, and Learning Disabilities. The treatment team consisted of an education specialist, two additional part-time teachers, a clinical social worker, an occupational therapist, a consulting senior child psychoanalyst, and the child's mother. The results at the close of the first school year are examined. Perspectives informing the psychoanalytic aspects of this case include Winnicottian and Fairbairnian Object Relations Theory and therapeutic milieu model.     

The Impact of Insecure Attachment on Mothering: A New Mother’s Story

This article describes the treatment of a first-time mother and her daughter. The mother’s impoverished primary relationships and the fragility of her early attachments contribute to her challenges with motherhood. Through parent-infant treatment she is gradually developing the capacity to reflect upon her experience and beginning to make discoveries about her attitudes toward herself and others. My work with Leslie has deepened my appreciation for Daniel Stern’s notion of “the motherhood constellation” and for the power of insecure attachment to destabilize the parent and consequently the parent-child relationship. During the treatment, I used the Newborn Behavioral Observations system as an adjunct to therapy to help demonstrate to this distressed new mother her infant’s competencies. Later, I also used the Adult Attachment Interview to enhance her curiosity about her own childhood, and in particular her relationship to her mother and the impact of that relationship on her own mothering.     

Female Passion and the Matrix of Mother,Daughter, and Body: Vicissitudes of the Maternal Transference in the Working Through of Sexual Inhibitions

The maternal object is rarely seen as a girl's source of identification as a vibrant, sexually desirous woman. In this paper, I propose that the mother's capacity both to convey her own pride and pleasure in her female body, its sexual and procreative capacities, and to confer the privilege of passion on her daughter is requisite for a girl's full, pleasurable possession of her body and sexuality. Using observations from two analyses, I explore ways in which transformations of the negative transference manifestations of thwarted maternal sexuality and its pernicious expressions within the mother–daughter relationship paralleled recovery of a fuller capacity for sexual pleasure and agency. To offer clinical pathways toward development of female analysands' capacities for feminine pride and sexual passion, theories must allow for adaptive resolution of oedipal-period conflicts—resolution that can lead to a mature mutuality between mother and daughter.     

'Talk to me baby, tell me what's the matter now': Semiotic and developmental perspectives on communication in psychoanalytic infant treatment

Infants suffer to a considerable degree from disturbances in nursing, sleep, mood, and attachment. Psychotherapeutic methods are increasingly used to help them. According to case reports, psychoanalytic work with infants and mothers has shown deep‐reaching and often surprisingly rapid results, both in symptom reduction and in improved relations between mother and child. The clinical urgency of the method makes it important to study its results and theoretical underpinnings. Among the theoretical issues often raised in discussions on this modifi ed form of psychoanalysis, those addressing the nature of communication between analyst, baby, and the mother are the most frequent. For example, how and what does an infant understand when the analyst interprets to her? What does the analyst understand of the infant's communication? These issues are addressed by investigating the infant's tools for understanding linguistic and emotional communication, and by providing a semiotic framework for describing the communication between the three participants in the analytic setting. The paper also investigates problems with the traditional ways of using the concept of symbolization within psychoanalytic theory. The theoretical investigation is illustrated by two brief vignettes from psychoanalytic work with an 8 month‐old girl and her mother. demand for the breast. Like the two lovers in the blues, they seemed to be slaves to     

Mens sana in corpore sano: Psychotherapy with a cerebral palsy child aged nine months

This paper is the acount of the psychoanalytic understanding and treatment of a nine-month-old cerebral-palsy infant and her mother. When first seen, Abigail hung over her mother's arm, and would scream unceasingly if moved from this position. The mother-child relationship seemed to involve their sticking to each other without looking or losing contact. The mother's hidden hate, anger and resentment were communicated non-verbally and Abigail showed signs of finding it difficult or impossible to integrate experiences, given the amount of trauma she had suffered from an attempted abortion and the lack of enough experience of being loved to enable her to grow internally.

The process of assessing the internal world of the infant and her mother, and the thinking and planning of the psychotherapy that followed, are described. In order to promote the secure attachment of the mother-child dyad, and the emotional growth of both, the helping process focused on understanding both the baby's and mother's states in order to make sense of the child's inner world to the mother. Because of the acute pain this process involved for the mother, she was treated individually too, by a different therapist.     

Mothers and Daughters from Today's Psychoanalytic Perspective

In this paper, I review and synthesize findings that may help us remodel the way we think about the vicissitudes of the mother-daughter relationship. Although exciting new ideas are burgeoning in the literature, there seems to be a lag between discoveries and their integration into clinical practice. Older theories emphasizing separation and the girl's “change of libidinal object” from mother to father reflect linear models that do not encompass the development we observe and experience. Newer theories depict development as interactive and relational throughout the life cycle—leading not to separation but to autonomy with connectedness. Applying male models to the female superego or speaking of the “female Oedipus complex” is misleading. New myths are being proposed to describe the conflicts integral to the girl's triangular situation. Applying the myth of Persephone and Demeter has been especially instructive. Many analysts tend to pathologize or infantilize the woman's ongoing tie to her mother and tend to misunderstand the intense ambivalence between daughter and mother. Once we recognize that the course of development is not linear, we should expect to see the woman revisiting, reexamining, and resynthesizing representations of self-versus-mother and self-with-mother over her lifetime.     

Keeping mother alive: psychotherapy with a teenage mother following human trafficking

The power of new traumatic events to reignite memories and the distress of traumatic experiences earlier in life is well known to psychotherapists. When the recent trauma has been extreme, the task of assisting the patient to understand their response in the light of their earlier experience can be doubly challenging. This paper describes the therapy with an adolescent girl and her infant daughter, following the girl's escape from illegal detention, physical abuse and forced prostitution, after she was trafficked to the UK from Eastern Europe. The discussion works towards developing an understanding of the emotional interchange between the mother and infant, and the influence of the mother's traumatic experiences, on that interchange. Projective identification could be seen to occur from the mother, into her daughter, in a reversal of the situation traditionally described. The function of this for the mother and the impact on the developing infant, are considered.     

The subjectivity of the mother in the mother–son relationship. Attachment,separation, and autonomy

Abstract

Margaret Mahler and John Bowlby's positions are crucial in understanding the tensions that can arise in mother–son relationships. A more recent development of a systems view illuminates the co-construction of this relationship that occurs mainly out of awareness. A systems model of development that describes the co-construction and bi-directional influence between mothers and sons will be used in this paper. The often-neglected subjectivity of the mother is the focus, and the relationship between the mother and her adult son is viewed as a process whereby all participants strive to achieve a balance among attachment, separation, and autonomy. In addition, the contributions of the mother and the impact on her of the son's difficulties in attachment, separation, and autonomy are highlighted. In a case illustration, the subjectivity of the mother in relation to her son is explicated, showing how the son distances himself from his mother and why themother is at a loss to understand how and why this has occurred. The mother's perspective was dominated by anger and disappointment toward her son as well as by self-blame and self-justification. As a result of psychotherapy, the mother was enabled to come to terms with the estrangement of her son.     

Identifications Annealed,Adhesive and Political: Commentary on Paper by Nina Farhi

Farhi's fascinating paper pays tribute to and extends those segments of Milner's clinical work that Milner hesitated to theorize explicitly herself. Seeking to understand the latter, I trace psychoanalytic politics in general and the history of Milner's relationships with Winnicott, Klein, and Riviere in particular to explore how her dutiful compliance to the rigid taxonomy of psychoanalytic power of her time bore on the trajectory of her becoming an analyst with a mind of her own. It is in accounting for how she struggled to disentangle herself from that web, that we discover how Milner was able to creatively refashion her work with her patient Susan, a process by which Susan was greatly impacted.

Following the trail of Farhi's ideas around this process and considering her thoughts around their psychic meanings for both analyst and patient, I explore their clinical implications. I focus on the transferential iterations of these dynamics to consider Farhi's suggestion that an annealed bond needs to be established in the treatment of patients who have, early in life, failed to develop annealed identifications. This opens up questions around how such bonds can malignantly colonize the analyst's mind and psychic reality, raises questions of self-care in the analyst and contributes to prognostically anticipating certain sets of enactments in the course of long-term psychoanalyses.     

Between Races and Generations: Materializing Race and Kinship in Moraga and Irigaray

Juxtaposing Cherríe Moraga's Loving in the War Years and Luce Irigaray's Speculum of the Other Woman, I explore the ways that sex and race intersect to complicate an Irigarayan account of the relations between mother and daughter. Irigaray's work is an effective tool for understanding the disruptive and potentially healing desire between mothers and daughters, but her insistence on sex as primary difference must be challenged in order to acknowledge the intersectionality of sex and race. Working from recent work on the psychoanalysis of race, I argue that whiteness functions as a master signifier in its own right, and as a means of differentiation between the light‐skinned Moraga and her brown‐skinned mother. Irigaray's concept of blood deepens Moraga's account of her healing and subversive return to her mother. The juxtaposition of Moraga, Irigaray, and contemporary psychoanalysis of race can allow for a necessary revision of Irigaray's psychoanalysis that acknowledges the ways in which sexual difference is indexed by race and sheds new light on her account of the mother–daughter relation.     

ADOLESCENT DAUCHTER/MIDLIFE MOTHER DYAD A New Look at Separation and Self-Definition

The mother-daughter relationship is seen as complex, unique, and emotionally charged, with adolescence being the most difficult period for this dyad. Yet much of the literature has highlighted the struggle of adolescents, while underemphasizing that many of their mothers themselves are confronting their own developmental issues at this time. In this article, the developmental tasks and dyadic issues of adolescent daughters (aged 13–19) and their midlife mothers (aged 35–55) are examined from a psychodynamic perspective. The authors posit that both mother and daughter are experiencing a lifecycle crisis of separation and self-definition. Drawing from psychoanalytic and lifespan developmental literature as well as their own clinical experience, the authors propose that the current generation of mothers and daughters requires a new look at old models, parts of which may still be relevant and parts of which need to be revised or dropped. The issues of competition and rebellion as they relate to separation and self-definition are also addressed.     

Binding,narcissistic pathology and the psychoanalytic process

This article discusses the question of truth claims in psychoanalysis, revolving around the concepts “construction”, “reconstruction”, “historical truth” and “narrative truth”. In Part I of the article, these concepts are discussed in an historical context, in particular, Freud's view, the narrative tradition and some of Bion's ideas. In Part II, an attempt is made to synthesize these concepts. It is argued that the constructed character of the unconscious has to be integrated into the patient's reconstruction of his/her life story. The psychoanalytic project enables the patient to create a new narrative that claims to possess historical validity. It is important in this context not to understand the notion of “history” objectivisticallv as if it were a question of revealing certain objective historical facts. Instead, it is suggested that the connection between the present understanding of the past and the past as it was experienced in the past should be understood as a fusion of horizons. Finally, the necessary function of consciousnesslself-consciousness for the psychoanalytic project of acquiring knowledge about one's unconscious is pointed out.