Four Key Dimensions for Distinguishing Internet Infidelity From Internet and Sex Addiction: Concepts and Clinical Application

Along with the advances and positives the Internet can have for relationships, there are also significant challenges to couples and families, including the potential for Internet addiction, Internet infidelity, cybersex, and other issues. The ambiguity between these concepts in literature creates difficulty in diagnosis and treatment for couple therapists. We propose four dimensions that can assist therapists to appropriately distinguish between an Internet infidelity scenario, a sex addiction facilitated by the Internet, and an Internet addiction.     

Internet Infidelity

SUMMARY

We used a multi-phase Delphi methodology to identify and explore critical issues, interventions, and gender differences in the treatment of Internet infidelity. We developed three representative vignettes related to Internet infidelity and asked twenty experts in extramarital affairs and/or sex addiction to respond to them, both through ratings and open-ended comments. We found little agreement among the experts. We discuss the unique features of Internet relationships, the areas of agreement and disagreement that we found among the experts, and the implications of our findings and the nature of Internet infidelity for both practice and training in marriage and family therapy.     

A Theoretical Framework for Defining,Understanding, and Treating Internet Infidelity

Abstract

We offer a theoretical framework for treating Internet infidelity that employs concepts from postmodernism and transgenerational therapy. With this framework, clinicians will better understand some of the definitional issues and system dynamics involved, which should support more informed, coherent treatment of Internet affairs.     

Infidelity

SUMMARY

In this article, we provide an overview of infidelity theory, research, and treatment. We discuss the effect of infidelity on couples and delineate three types of infidelityemotional, physical, and infidelity including aspects of both. Further, we expand traditional thinking about infidelity by reviewing the role of the Internet in infidelity, and explore infidelity within the context of comarital relationships. Finally, we discuss the overarching theories and common models used in infidelity treatment.     

Forgiveness or breakup: Sex differences in responses to a partner's infidelity

Infidelities--sexual, emotional, or both--afflict many long-term romantic relationships. When a person discovers a partner's betrayal, a major decision faced is to forgive the partner and remain together or to terminate the relationship. Because men and women have confronted different adaptive problems over evolutionary history associated with different forms of infidelity, we hypothesised the existence of sex differences in which aspects of infidelity would affect the likelihood of forgiveness or breakup. We tested this hypothesis using forced-choice dilemmas in which participants (N = 256) indicated how difficult it would be to forgive the partner and how likely they would be to break up with the partner, depending on the nature of the infidelity. Results support the hypothesis that men, relative to women: (a) find it more difficult to forgive a sexual infidelity than an emotional infidelity; and (b) are more likely to terminate a current relationship following a partner's sexual infidelity than an emotional infidelity. The Discussion provides directions for future work on the determinants of breakup and the psychology of forgiveness.     

Jealousy and infidelity: The role of gender identity and culture of honour

Abstract

This research is aimed at examining whether gender and the culture of honour were associated with the type of infidelity (sexual or emotional) that is perceived as most disturbing. A total of 748 Spanish university students (336 men and 412 women), answered to six dilemmas which raised the type of infidelity that had greater impact on them (sexual or emotional), a scale of gender identity and a scale of culture of honour. The results showed that both men and women were more affected by emotional infidelity. In addition it was found that the effect of sex on the type of infidelity that stresses the participants more was moderated by sociocultural variables such as the culture of honour, masculinity and femininity.     

Jealousy,Gender, and Culture of Honor: A Study in Portugal and Brazil

The purpose of this study was to examine whether gender and culture of honor were associated with the type of infidelity (sexual or emotional) that affected our subjects more. Samples of 192 Portuguese university students (119 women and 73 men) and 415 Brazilian university students (214 men and 201 women) participated in this research. Participants responded to six dilemmas reflecting a type of infidelity (sexual or emotional), a gender scale, and a culture of honor scale. The results of both samples are compatible with the cultural theses about jealousy. Both men and women were more affected by emotional infidelity. In addition, it was found that the relationship between the sex of the participants and the type of infidelity that induced stress in them was affected by sociocultural variables, such as culture of honor, masculinity, and femininity. Some differences in the response patterns in the case of an infidelity, in both samples (Portuguese and Brazilian), are shown and discussed.     

Facebook Infidelity: When Poking Becomes Problematic

Recent research has focused on the Internet and relationships; however, little attention has been given to the specific role of social networking sites in relationship betrayal. Exploring the processes related to discovery of Facebook infidelity behaviors adds another layer to understanding Internet infidelity and highlights the behaviors unique to Facebook infidelity. Stories about cheating (N = 90), taken from the website FacebookCheating.com were analyzed using grounded theory methodology to create a process model of discovery. Researchers sought to answer four questions: (1) What is the experience of nonparticipating partners when their partners have engaged in infidelity behaviors on Facebook? (2) What are the basic social processes that occur when discovering the infidelity behaviors? And, (3) What are the basic psychological processes that occur? (4) What similarities or differences exist between the current research on offline and online infidelity and the process model from the current study? The categories are arranged in a process model, which depicts these processes as well as the emotional experience of the nonparticipating partner. The model highlights important phases through which the nonparticipating partner cycled following the discovery of the infidelity. These include appraising the boundary damage, acting on the appraisal, and making a decision about the relationship. Suggestions for clinical intervention based on this process are provided. Future research implications are also discussed.     

Lie to me no more: believable stories and marital affairs.

This case study illustrates the dilemmas of systemic practice when the presenting problem is relational infidelity (marital affairs). After several months of treatment with a structural therapist, the couple and therapist were at an impasse because of arguments over the husband's alleged sexual encounter 3 years previously. The introduction of a consultant and a story-based therapy allowed the couple to reconcile their marital difficulties. The article ends with a discussion of the implications of systemic paradigms and personal morality.     

Video Game Therapy: Application of the Couple and Family Technology Framework

The couple and family technology framework outlines how technology affects couple and family relationships. This framework has been applied to understanding the impact of technology on infidelity, contributed to our understanding of online gaming issues in couple relationships, and sexting. The purpose of this paper is to outline how to implement video gaming as a disciplinary tool for youth congruent with the couple and family technology framework. Specifically, we identify the elements of video games that can be applied as an intervention in family treatment with youth in a token economy. This proposed technique focuses on utilizing technology (and specifically video games) as a strategy to improve youth’s behavior. Consistent with the couple and family technology framework, this paper outlines how accessibility, affordability, accommodation, and approximation can be used to improve behavior as well as improve parent–child relationships. Implications are included.     

Sexualit?t in Zeiten des Internet

The Internet shows several more or less specific characteristics, in particular accessibility, anonymity, affordability, worldwide connectivity and interactivity. These characteristics hold chances as well as risks for the development of sexuality and sexual relationships. Rarely stressed and investigated are the possible positive effects, such as easier sexual contacts especially for individuals with social deficits, for sexual minorities (e.g. gay, lesbian, transgender, sadomasochists or fetishists), reducing sexual prejudices and stereotypes, better partner matching and easy access to reliable information and counseling platforms about sexual issues. The psychotherapist more often encounters the problematic effects of Internet pornography and cybersex, such as avoiding real life (offline) sexual and non-sexual social contacts, the stress on relationships (e.g. through cyber infidelity), intensifying fantasies and impulses that are harmful to oneself or others up to criminal behavior (e.g. use and circulation of child pornography). Describing a case history this review discusses the role of the Internet in the development of sexual addictive or compulsive symptomatology, including treatment options. Only a differentiated analysis of the chances and risks can counterbalance the increasing tendencies to demonize and pathologize the use of the Internet for sexual purposes.     

Evidence for conditional sex differences in emotional but not in sexual jealousy at the automatic level of cognitive processing

The two evolutionary psychological hypotheses that men react more jealous than women to sexual infidelity and women react more jealous than men to emotional infidelity are currently controversial because of apparently inconsistent results. We suggest that these inconsistencies can be resolved when the two hypotheses are evaluated separately and when the underlying cognitive processes are considered. We studied jealousy with forced‐choice decisions and emotion ratings in a general population sample of 284 adults aged 20–30 years using six infidelity dilemmas and recordings of reaction times. The sex difference for emotional jealousy existed for decisions under cognitive constraint, was also evident in the decision speed, increased for faster decisions, and was stronger for participants with lower education. No evidence for a sex difference in sexual jealousy was found. Our results support the view of a specific female sensitivity to emotional infidelity that canalizes the development of an adaptive sex difference in emotional jealousy conditional to the sociocultural environment. Copyright © 2007 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.     

A socio-emotional relational framework for infidelity: the relational justice approach

Current clinical models for addressing infidelity tend not to make social context issues a central focus; yet, societal gender and power structures, such as female responsibility for relationships and limited male vulnerability, affect the etiology of affairs and create power imbalances in intimate relationships. How therapists respond to these societal influences may either limit or enhance the mutual healing of both persons in the relationship. Thus attention to these societal processes is an ethical issue. This paper presents one perspective, the Relational Justice Approach, for working with infidelity. It places gender, power, and culture at the center of intervention in couple therapy, and includes three stages: (1) creating an equitable foundation for healing, (2) placing the infidelity in a societal context, and (3) practicing mutuality. Each stage is illustrated with case examples and contrasted with current practice regarding infidelity.     

Cyber-Sex

Abstract

While percentages of extramarital sex (EMS) vary from study to study, it can be estimated that 50-60% of married men and 45-55% of married women engage in extramarital sex at some time or another during their marriage and almost half come to therapy because of it. EMS appears in several different forms, only some of which are sexual in nature. Recently, couples are coming to therapy with a new type of affair: the Cyber-Affair. According to the President of the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers, this type of Internet infidelity has been greatly underestimated due to the Internet's current popularity as a technological advancement. In addition, healthcare professionals are often unfamiliar with the dynamics associated with the relatively new concept of cyber-affairs and the electronic process of “virtual cheating” and thus often do not consider the behavior as infidelity.

It is the purpose of this paper to explore this new phenomenon, the cyber-affair and to investigate how the ability to form romantic and sexual relationships over the Internet can sometimes lead to marital separation and divorce. In addition, the paper examines the factors involved in Internet infidelity, the unique problems associated with this type of affair, along with a discussion of the therapeutic considerations.     

Dating infidelity: behaviors, reasons and consequences

Older adolescents were surveyed concerning three issues: behaviors which constitute infidelity in a dating relationship, reasons for a dating partner to be unfaithful, and reactions to a dating partner's infidelity. Responses from 247 participants indicated more similarities than differences between dating infidelity and extramarital affairs with regard to behaviors, causes, and consequences. Results are discussed in terms of similarities between dating and marital infidelity, and the rationale for professionals to interact with adolescents concerning the potential long-term consequences of dating infidelity.     

Legal responsibilities for educational psychologists

This paper considers the legal responsibilities of educational psychologists which fall mainly in relation to pupils with special educational needs. The first section introduces the work of educational psychologists, with some discussion of the professional and ethical difficulties posed by many aspects of their practice. An outline of the legal framework for their work in the England and Wales is provided, as an example of the application of those professional and ethical issues in practice, followed by and outline of potential areas of legal challenge and their implications. Reference is finally made to problems being experienced in policy, principle and practice arising from the tensions and dilemmas inherent in the legislation.     

Intervening with Military Couples Struggling with Issues of Sexual Infidelity

Both the prevalence and adverse impact of infidelity argue for the importance of disseminating evidence-based interventions for couples struggling with this highly disruptive event. We describe an integrative approach for promoting recovery from infidelity drawing on empirically supported treatments for couple distress as well as empirical literature regarding recovery from interpersonal trauma and recovery from relationship injuries. We then describe a structured 8 session adaptation of this protocol tailored to military couples struggling with issues of infidelity. Reaching these high-risk couples requires extending both the availability and efficacy of services delivered by professionals within the military from diverse disciplines. We present initial findings indicating that US Army chaplains receiving training in this structured protocol not only can learn information regarding the conceptual underpinnings and specific interventions comprising this treatment, but also can apply it appropriately in analog clinical situations. We conclude with suggestions for extending dissemination efforts to reduce acute adverse consequences experienced by service members and their partners experiencing infidelity.     

Face It Head On

SUMMARY

This article focuses on key clinical ideas to help couples face directly the painful issues brought about by infidelity. The author discusses key relational processes related to infidelity along with desired outcomes. The emphasis is on helping couples change key relational dynamics that facilitate the healing process. Couples are encouraged to engage in the healing process head on, and not avoid or skirt around the issues. The article illustrates these desired changes by means of a case Study.     

The dynamics of a disturbance: New and established interests in technology policy debates

The effects of technological change have political implications. A “disturbance,” such as the rise of the Internet as a mass medium, brings about new policy issues and establishes new interest organizations in the lobbying community. The differential mobilization of interests can affect the resolution of these policy issues. I combine face-to-face interviews with Washington representatives from organizations involved in Internet policy debates with compiled data on the extent of their involvement to outline the difficulties that organizations face when building lobbying capacity, developing an agenda, and forming coalitions. The results indicate that new entrants face substantially more constraints than established interests and that these differences may affect policy outcomes. He formerly served as Research Director for the California Commission on Internet Political Practices.     

高校学生道德困境研究:日常德性的视角

以45位本科生和硕士研究生为对象, 采用日常德性的视角, 考察高校学生在日常生活中亲历的道德困境, 重点探讨个人日常道德困境的内容, 以及他们对个人日常道德困境的解读和处理。结果表明(1)个人日常道德困境多数不同于假设性的公正取向的道德困境。人们对各类个人日常道德困境的解读和阐释存在个体差异。道德内容主要取决于人们所强调的问题。(2)人们所主张的有助于处理日常道德困境的策略与他们在生活中实际采用的策略是有差异的。在真实的道德选择和决定中, 会有更多利己和实用的考虑。此外, 人们对道德行为的判断多倚重对行为后果(特别是伤害性后果)的考虑。