Modeling dating decisions in a mock swiping paradigm: An examination of participant and target characteristics

New online dating platforms, such as Tinder, are dramatically changing the context in which people seek romantic relationships. In these platforms, users select partners they are willing to start a conversation with by “swiping” on them. These platforms provide exciting possibilities for applying new methods to test how user (e.g., demographic, personality) and target/partner (e.g., attractiveness, race) factors predict attraction. Across four laboratory studies (total N = 2,679), target physical attractiveness and target race were the largest predictors of decisions in this hypothetical dating context, whereas user individual difference traits were poor predictors. The current studies provide substantive information about the factors that predict romantic attraction in the context of mobile-based dating applications.     

The adversity of secret relationships

Are secret romantic relationships alluring or aversive? Previous research suggests that romantic secrecy (i.e., keeping a romantic relationship secret from others) creates a cognitive preoccupation that enhances romantic attraction. In contrast, we predicted that romantic secrecy interferes with relationship interdependence and thereby decreases relationship quality. Three studies of secrecy in ongoing romantic relationships confirmed this prediction. In Study 1, romantic secrecy predicted lower levels of initial relationship quality and decreased relationship quality over a 2‐week period. In Study 2, relationship burden mediated partially the negative association between romantic secrecy and relationship quality. In Study 3, the negative association between romantic secrecy and relationship quality was primarily explained by decreased relationship satisfaction. The importance of understanding romantic secrecy is discussed.     

GENDER, PEER RELATIONS, AND CHALLENGES FOR GIRLFRIENDS AND BOYFRIENDS COMING TOGETHER IN ADOLESCENCE

This article examines how girls' and boys' different peer cultures in middle childhood may set the stage for challenges in emerging heterosexual romantic relationships in adolescence. Two theoretical frameworks are presented for understanding gender differences in children's same-gender friendships and peer groups in middle childhood: the two cultures perspective ( Maccoby, 1998 ) and the emotional trade-offs perspective ( Rose & Rudolph, 2006 ). Emerging empirical evidence is presented to highlight how girls' and boys' gendered friendship qualities may be linked to difficulties girls and boys have when they come together in early romantic relationships. Preliminary longitudinal data are presented that suggest that girls' relational and boys' physical aggression toward same-gender peers in middle childhood may relate to having emotionally intense arguments in early adolescence. Implications for prevention and intervention are discussed.     

“Be careful what you wish for…”: A quantitative and qualitative investigation of “fata1 attractions”

This study uses questionnaire data from 301 terminated romantic relationships to investigate hypotheses concerning the conditions under which a quality that is initially appealing in a partner is later disliked (i.e., a “fatal attraction”). Individuals are expected to be prone to fatal attractions when they are attracted to a quality in a romantic partner that is “different” in any of three ways: (1) different from the individual's own qualities (i.e., dissimilar); (2) different from average (i.e., extreme, or unique); or (3) different from normative expectations (i.e., gender atypical). Such attractions are less likely, however, when individuals are drawn to similarity in another. Findings from a logistic regression analysis provide support for four of the five hypotheses. Fatal attractions are significantly more likely when an individual is drawn to partner characteristics seen either as “dissimilar” from her or his own, as “unique,” or as “extreme” in nature. When these characteristics are viewed as “similar,” disenchantment is less likely. Fatal attractions are neither more, nor less, probable, however, when partner qualities contradict gender stereotypes. A qualitative analysis of open-ended questionnaire responses provides further support for these attraction patterns. The findings have implications for diverse theories, including those of mate selection and dialectics.     

Heterosexual, Lesbian, and Gay Preadoptive Parents’ Preferences About Child Gender

Little research has explored the child gender preferences of preadoptive parents. This study utilized a mixed-methods approach to explore child gender preferences (and individuals’ reasons for such preferences) in a geographically diverse, US sample of 93 heterosexual, 61 lesbian, and 48 gay male preadoptive couples. Heterosexual men were the least likely to demonstrate a gender preference and gay men were the most likely. Individuals in heterosexual relationships were more likely to prefer girls than individuals in same-gender relationships. In explaining their preferences, sexual minorities often emphasized gender socialization considerations (e.g., their perceived inability to socialize a child of the opposite gender) and concerns about heterosexism (e.g., some gay men preferred girls because they felt a boy would encounter more harassment).     

Associations Between Mixed-Gender Friendships,Gender Reference Group Identity and Substance Use in College Students

We investigated the associations between same-gender friendship, gender reference group identity, and substance use in college students (54 % male, M age?=?19.23, SD?=?1.23) from the northeastern United States using an online survey. Male students reported greater weekly marijuana, but not alcohol use than female students. Regression analyses revealed that having a greater proportion of same-gender friendships was associated with greater weekly alcohol use for male students and lesser weekly alcohol and marijuana use for female students. Gender reference group identity was negatively associated with weekly marijuana use for male and female students. For female students, gender reference group identity mediated the association between proportion of same-gender friendships and weekly marijuana use. Our study highlights the importance of considering the social context (e.g., the gender of friends) and individual variables relating to gender (e.g. gender reference group identity) in substance use research. Our findings fit within social constructionist models of social development that suggest participation in gendered contexts (e.g., same-gender or other-gender-peer contexts) over time cue gender-typed behaviors such as using marijuana.     

The attachment system in fledgling relationships: an activating role for attachment anxiety

Is it sensible to study attachment dynamics between potential romantic partners before they share a full-fledged attachment bond? The present data indicate that such an approach may reveal novel insights about initial attraction processes. Four studies suggest that the state-like experience of attachment anxiety has functional implications within fledgling (i.e., desired or undeveloped) romantic relationships, well before the formation of an attachment bond. Studies 1 and 3 reveal that attachment anxiety directed toward a particular romantic interest is elevated before (in comparison with after) participants report being in an established relationship. Studies 2 and 3 demonstrate that such partner-specific attachment anxiety predicts attachment-relevant outcomes in fledgling relationships, including proximity seeking, safe haven, secure base, passionate love, and other approach behaviors. These associations were reliable above and beyond (and were typically as strong as or stronger than) the effect of sexual desire. Finally, Study 4 presents evidence that partner-specific attachment anxiety may cause several of these attachment-relevant outcomes. Attachment anxiety seems to be a normative experience and may signal the activation of the attachment system during the earliest stages of romantic relationships.     

How Low Will Men with High Self-Esteem Go? Self-Esteem as a Moderator of Gender Differences in Minimum Relationship Standards

Men tend to establish minimum standards that are similar to those of women for high investment relationships (e.g., marriage) but set lower standards for relationships requiring less investment (e.g., a one-night stand). The purpose of the present study was to examine whether self-esteem moderates these gender differences in minimum standards for romantic relationships. This was accomplished by conducting a cross-sectional study with undergraduate participants (57 men and 124 women) from the southern region of the United States. Participants completed a self-esteem measure and reported their minimum standards for partners across various levels of relational involvement. As predicted, high self-esteem was associated with higher standards for low investment relationships among women but lower standards among men.     

Personality features and mate retention strategies: Honesty–humility and the willingness to manipulate,deceive, and exploit romantic partners

Personality features are associated with several relationship outcomes. We examined whether specific personality features differed in their associations with “mate retention” strategies. We examined the unique associations that personality features had with mate retention strategies reported by 179 community members in romantic relationships for at least 6 months. Personality features were associated with each of the mate retention strategies such that positive personality features (e.g., high levels of honesty–humility) were associated with less reliance on mate retention strategies that involved manipulating, deceiving, or exploiting romantic partners. Discussion focuses on the implications of these results for understanding the connection between personality features and behaviors intended to preserve and maintain romantic relationships.     

Differences in the importance of romantic structures among transgender and cisgender adults during the COVID-19 pandemic

The stressors of the global COVID-19 pandemic have led to an increased need for support. For adults, romantic relationships often represent an environment of emotional support and stability; as such, attitudes toward—and particularly the importance of—romantic relationships may have shifted as a result of the pandemic. The present cross-sectional study explores how U.S. transgender (n = 99) and cisgender people (n = 1886) report whether they have perceived a change in their feelings about the importance of long-term romantic structures (i.e., committed relationships, monogamy, cohabiting with a romantic partner, and marriage) as a result of the COVID-19 pandemic. Results found that transgender people reported a more positive perceived change in importance placed on all four romantic items relative to cisgender people. Different forms of stress (e.g., social, financial, health) associated with the COVID-19 pandemic may have contributed to an increased need, and subsequent desire, for social connection and support in the form of romantic relationships among transgender individuals to a greater extent than cisgender individuals, perhaps in part due to the additional layers of stress transgender people must navigate. Results are discussed through the lens of the minority stress framework.     

Gender Differences and Similarities in Strategies for Managing Conflict with Friends and Romantic Partners

Using hypothetical vignettes, we investigated the extent to which gender differences in conflict-management strategies depended on the relationship context of a same-gender friendship vs. a romantic relationship. Associations between conflict-management strategies, goals and gender-typed traits also were assessed. Men (131) and women (203) undergraduate students (19–25?years) from a state university in the Mid-Atlantic region of the United States participated. To assess expressive and instrumental personality traits, participants completed the Personal Attributes Questionnaire (PAQ; Spence and Helmreich 1978). Participants also rated their endorsement of communal and agentic goals and strategies for managing hypothetical conflicts presented in the “Peer Conflict Management Questionnaire.” This questionnaire, created for the purposes of this study, consisted of 4 vignettes that portrayed hypothetical conflicts with a friend and a romantic partner. Results showed that women were more likely than men to endorse communal strategies when managing conflict with a same-gender friend, but not with a romantic partner. Women were more likely than men to endorse agentic strategies for managing conflict with a romantic partner, but not with a same-gender friend. For conflicts with a same-gender friend, communal goals, but not expressive traits or gender, predicted communal strategy endorsement. For conflicts with a romantic partner, gender and agentic goals predicted agentic strategies; instrumental traits did not. Implications for understanding consequences of gender-typed relationship processes are discussed. The contextual specificity of gender differences and similarities are emphasized.     

Turning inward versus outward: Relationship work in young adults and romantic functioning

This study examined 106 romantically involved young adults to determine the frequency of disclosure of romantic problems to both partners and best friends and links to romantic functioning. Results revealed females and males did not differ in frequency of this “relationship work” (RW) with either partners or friends and both engaged in more frequent RW with partners. Simple slopes analyses indicated that discussing romantic problems often with a friend and rarely with a partner was associated with poorer romantic functioning (e.g., less happiness, commitment, love). Conversely, when engaging in frequent RW with partners, regardless of RW performed with friends, relationships flourished. Findings link the social network to romantic functioning and reinforce the importance of discussing romantic problems with one's partner.     

Self-compassion promotes positive adjustment for people who attribute responsibility of a romantic breakup to themselves

Attributing responsibility for a romantic breakup to the self can have dual effects on psychological adjustment, exacerbating disruptive thoughts and feelings, yet also increasing the likelihood of positive changes. Three studies (N = 441) examined whether these dual effects associated with attributing responsibility for a romantic breakup to the self are moderated by self-compassion. Supporting this assertion, trait self-compassion predicted better romantic outlook (Studies 1 & 2), and induced self-compassion predicted greater intended future romantic partner appreciation (Study 3), among people who attributed greater responsibility of a breakup to themselves. In addition, higher trait (Study 2) and induced self-compassion (Study 3) boosted self-improvement motivation with regard to future relationships among participants who attributed responsibility of a romantic breakup to themselves. These adjustment-promoting tendencies associated with self-compassion held controlling for a range of variables known to impact romantic breakup adjustment (e.g., self-esteem, attachment styles, and prior relationship characteristics). We discuss possible mechanisms for these effects and broader implications for future self-compassion research.     

Pluralistic ignorance in revenge attitudes and behavior in interpersonal relationships

We investigated whether people's perceptions of social norms concerning interpersonal revenge reflect a tendency for individuals to believe that others' revenge attitudes and behavior differ from their own (i.e., pluralistic ignorance). As part of a survey on revenge experiences in relationships with romantic partners, family members, and associates (e.g., friends), participants (N = 534) judged the acceptability and frequency of revenge in significant personal relationships. As expected, participants believed that others (a) saw revenge as more acceptable and (b) engaged in revenge more frequently than they did themselves. They did not, however, perceive others' revenge attitudes and behaviors to be any more variable than their own attitudes and behaviors actually were. Explanations for and implications of these findings are discussed.     

The association between romantic relationships and delinquency in adolescence and young adulthood

This study examined the association between romantic relationships and delinquency in adolescence and young adulthood. Using a large, longitudinal, and nationally representative sample, results from negative binomial regressions showed a positive association between romantic involvement and delinquency in adolescence. Furthermore, the cumulative number of romantic relationships from adolescence to young adulthood was positively related to delinquency in young adulthood even after controlling for earlier delinquency in adolescence. These analyses also controlled for the effects of participants' gender, age at initial assessment, puberty, race/ethnicity, and other demographic characteristics (e.g., family structure and parents' education). Findings are discussed in terms of their implications for understanding the role of romantic relationships in the development of young people and for stimulating future research questions.     

Individual differences in dispositional mindfulness and initial romantic attraction: A speed dating experiment

Initial romantic attraction has important implications for the development of romantic relationships. Much research demonstrates that physical attractiveness predicts initial romantic attraction. However, less is known about the influence of individual difference characteristics on initial romantic attraction. Here we examined whether dispositional mindfulness predicted initial romantic attraction beyond the effects of physical attractiveness in a speed-dating experiment. Women were more attracted to men higher in dispositional mindfulness, beyond the effects of physical attractiveness. Men were more attracted to women who were more physically attractive, but female mindfulness did not influence male initial attraction. This is the first study to examine the role of dispositional mindfulness in predicting initial romantic attraction.     

Do automatic reactions elicited by thoughts of romantic partner, mother, and self relate to adult romantic attachment?

Three studies tested the expectation that automatic reactions elicited by the mental representation of one's current romantic partner, mother, and self relate to adult romantic attachment. Adult romantic attachment was assessed using multiple measures, and individual differences in automatic reactions were assessed by the Implicit Association Test (IAT). Studies 1 and 2 showed that automatic reactions elicited by thoughts of current romantic partner, but not by thoughts of self, were related to adult romantic attachment assessed at a specific (i.e., within one's current romantic relationship) and general level (i.e., across all romantic relationships). The pattern of results was stronger among individuals identified as attachment-schematic. Studies 2 and 3 showed that automatic reactions elicited by thoughts of one's mother were related to adult romantic attachment assessed at a general level. In all three studies, results did not differ depending on how adult romantic attachment was conceptualized (four styles vs. two dimensions).     

Narcissism and romantic attraction: Evidence from a collectivistic culture

The purpose of this study was to examine the relationship between narcissism and romantic attraction in a collectivistic culture (i.e., Thailand). In Study 1, participants completed a measure of narcissism and rated their attraction to four potential romantic partners. There was an overall preference across participants for caring targets. Additionally, high narcissists were more attracted to admiring and high status targets than were low narcissists. A similar pattern of results was found in Study 2 with targets that were either high caring/low status or high status/low caring. Overall, caring in a partner was highly valued in a collectivistic culture, but narcissism still predicted attraction to targets who offered the potential for self-enhancement. These findings suggest that classically Western self-enhancement can be found in Eastern samples; however, to uncover these self-enhancement processes, researchers might need to use a personality variable such as narcissism.