幸福夫妇们的共同秘诀

大多数夫妇一定都会赞同:幸福的婚姻是需要时间和精力来投资的。但是,作为心理顾问,我们已经看到许多夫妇的努力一直没见效,他们因此就心灰意冷。最幸福的夫妇们密切两人之间关系的方法各有千秋。在与他们相处的日子里,我们发现幸福美满婚姻的秘诀。为了创建并保持一种永恒、美满的婚姻关系,人们都要按照这些简单的步骤去做。 1、美满姻缘来之不易:我们中的大多数人越来越认为,爱情是不可思议的。我们都“不由自主”地相爱了——身不由己地“陷入”了情网。     

她怎么离婚了

圣经上是说过“上帝配合的,人不可分开”(太19:6下),上帝设立婚姻的目的当然不是为了离婚,乃是要人为他生育敬虔的后代,享受亲情之乐,享受爱的生活。但是总有离了婚的人,若一概地给他们贴上一个违背神圣盟约的标签,未免太浅薄了。某大城市的郊县有一位信主的姊妹名叫徐元元,她和丈夫育有两个女儿,女儿们都上中学了。徐姊妹信主之前为人泼辣,丈夫一向迁就她;信主之后,她经常听道,懂得了不少圣经道理,晓得做妻子的应当     

金币丢了

有人去请教他的导师,智者与普通人会有什么不同。他的导师捋了捋胡子,给他讲了一个故事。从前,有一个国王,想从两个儿子中选择一个做王位继承人。就给他们每人一枚金币,让他们骑马到远处的一个小镇上,去随便购买一件东西。而在这之前,国王命人偷偷地把他们的衣兜都给剪了一个洞。中午,兄弟俩回来了,大儿子闷闷不乐,小儿子却兴高彩烈。国王先问大儿子发生了什么事,大儿子沮丧地说:“金币丢了。”国王又问小儿子为什么这般高兴,小儿子说他用那枚金币买到了一个无形的财富,足以让他受益一辈子。这个财富就是一个良好的教训:在把贵重的东西放进…     

遗传和环境对婚姻的影响

遗传和环境是影响人的两个根本因素,人的心理和行为是在二者及其共同作用的基础上逐渐发展的。婚姻是大多数人一生中最重要的事件之一,同样也受到遗传和环境的制约。文章从择偶、婚姻质量、离婚等婚姻生活的不同方面着手,回顾和评价了进化心理学、社会与文化心理学和行为遗传学对婚姻中遗传和环境影响因素的研究     

神的儿子和人的女子

在《创世记》第六章中出现了一种令人费解的婚姻模式：“神的儿子们看见人的女子美貌,就随意挑选,娶来为妻。”（创6：2）这样的结合确实让人诧异,也未免太不“门当户对”了!“神的儿子”和“人的女子”到底是何许人也？历来的解经家众说纷纭,莫衷一是。但在诸多的解释中,其中有两种解释是被广为热议的。     

你真的很忙吗?

心理学家认为,一个人感到幸福,必须有两个前提条件,即令人满意的工作和令人愉快的休闲时光。 可是,不少现代人总抱怨自己很忙,好像真的日理万机,叱咤风云,忙得连生病的空儿都没有了。其实,不少人的抱怨,实际上是一种“病”,一种心“忙”。 心理学家认为,不少人之所以“忙”,可能是出于以下几种情形:事实上他们并不需要这么忙碌,但总要让人们将他们看得很忙;偶尔他们确实需要忙上一阵子,于是他们就发牢骚或抱怨自己     

神算"算"骗子反被骗子"算"--嵊州有个男子赔了钱财还丢"夫人"

本报讯近日,自诩为“神算”算命兼看相的裘某,在嵊州市剡堤摆摊看相时,被一男一女两个骗子以介绍婚姻为名骗走了一大笔钱。当日上午,该市崇仁镇的裘某在剡堤南端“设摊”给人算命看相。一个30多岁的中年男子找上了他,要求给他看看相。裘某装模作样地看了一番后,告诉他不久一定会发大财,运气就在眼前,说得那中年男子“心花怒放”。中年男子自称是杭州人,妹妹珍珍前年丧偶,经人介绍欲与在嵊州打工的杭州人结婚,故而特地陪妹妹来到三江城建筑工地找那杭州人,已经找了3天却找不到人,现在暂住在三江城一家旅店里,决定再找找看,如果真的找不到只好…     

认识自己

你认识自己吗?其实每个人都不止一次地问过自己,但答案却总是很模糊。有时似乎很了解自己,有时却又不知道自己想要什么,想干什么,甚至会产生一种疑问:我到底是谁?正因为你是人,所以才会思考这个问题。动物永远不知道它是动物,而人的智慧就在于自己知道自己是人。人是个微妙存在,他必须与现实、超我、本我作一生的斗争。要承认人都有两个“我”:一个住在大门内,一个住在大门外。住在大门内的是具有一定良知,符合一定常规,有一定道德的“我”;而住在大门外的是不符合常规,与传统道德、教育相违背的“我”。两个“我”时常在门口徘徊,都互相羡慕对方。但在他们之间除了那道门,还有个铁石心肠的门卫,24小时看管着,不允许他们互相串门。但当人一旦     

托尔斯泰的仁者风范

1840年，喀山大学。夏天来临的时候，学校大门外不远处有两个卖甜瓜的摊位。俗话说：“同行是冤家。”两位摊主为了招徕顾客，展开了明里暗里的竞争。他们一个挂出“不甜不熟包换”的招牌，另一个招牌上则写着“不好吃退钱”。当然，两人也都练就了一副巧舌如簧。每天，他们和顾客进行着不见硝烟的心理战争。     

喜乐人生

中国有句俗语:“一朝被蛇咬,十年怕井绳”之说,很能揭示一般人际遇之后的心理反应,比如,曾被人蒙骗过的人,是很难认为“诚信”这东西是可靠的;做了好事却惹来一身麻烦等等,这不可能不让人想起“人心不古”这句老话而快乐不起来,然而我们如何去面对呢!     

Seeing and hearing and space and space and time

A previous experiment had shown spatial location to be judged in terms of the framework provided by the modality in which stimuli were presented. In the present study, digits were either auditorally or visually presented, and in either form the three digits appeared successivly to the left, in the center, and to the right of the S. The digit which occurred temporally in the middle of the sequence was never central from the spatial viewpoint. The S was asked to indicate which digit was the middle one. Ss were blind, deaf, or normal. The deaf and two control groups saw visual displays, and the blind and their controls heard auditory displays. The former groups predominantly chose the spatially middle digit and the latter groups the temporally middle. It was concluded that modality of presentation was the trigger which switched in the coding dimension of time or space.     

Bob and Carol and Tess and Ali

Conflicting religious experiences in different traditions do not necessarily defeat the rationality of conflicting beliefs sustained by those experiences in those traditions. The circularity that protects religious beliefs from such mutual defeat is not vicious. Moreover, the lack of ‘epistemological humility’ exhibited by such believers poses no threat to world peace. In fact, a campaign for compulsory humility would itself constitute a much greater threat.     

Law and Gospel,and Youth and Family Ministry

Abstract : If “faith comes through hearing” the word of God comprised in law and gospel, how do the imperatives that characterize ‘Youth and Family Ministry’ make such hearing possible? Here, literature delineating ‘Youth and Family Ministry’ is analyzed in light of its biblical foundations. The primary lens implemented in this analysis is the law/gospel hermeneutic advocated by Martin Luther and other reformers.     

Extremes of self-esteem and narcissism and the experience and expression of anger and aggression

This study examined the level of self-esteem and narcissism as personality variables involved in the disposition to experience and express anger. Three hundred thirty-eight subjects were sampled across two higher education centres and one student teaching programme in the United Kingdom. It was reasoned that individuals with both high self-esteem and narcissism would report especially high tendencies to experience and express anger and aggression and that those with high self-esteem and low narcissism would report the lowest. These predictions were influenced by theories that emphasise the role of threats to high self-esteem in the production of aggression and violence. Results indicate that groups defined by their extreme scores on self-esteem and narcissism scales produced levels of anger expression in the predicted direction. The importance of considering extreme levels of self-esteem and narcissism (in conjunction with other factors) in an analysis of anger is discussed with reference to currently influential theories in the field. Aggr. Behav. 24:421–438, 1998. © 1998 Wiley-Liss, Inc.     

Dance and psychotherapy--possibilities and limits

From a starting point of therapeutic and prophylactic components identifiable in the dance, the authors regard the dance as deserving of greater attention than was hitherto the case in programs of physiotherapy, psychotherapy, and sociotherapy. From the existing essays at a therapy basing on body and motion, they infer basic common points, and to promote discussion, they state their attitudes in respect of the potential and rank of the dance in the concept of complex multimodal psychotherapy.     

Yin and Yang,and the Hot and the Cold

Yin and Yang are important concepts in ancient Chinese philosophy.Western scholars have become more familiar with these two concepts recently,but for a long time almost no one considered comparing them with their own tradition such as the ancient Greek philosophy,and especially with the ideas of the Hot and the Cold in Presocratic philosophy.In this paper,I make an attempt to do exactly that,and especially make a detailed comparison between the thoughts of two ancient thinkers:Laozi and Anaximander.I discuss the thought of Yin and Yang in Laozi-who was the earliest philosopher making use of the concepts Yin and Yang-to express his cosmological thought in ancient Chinese philosophy.Comparatively,I discuss the ideas of the Hot and the Cold in Anaximander,the earlier among Presocratic philosophers referring to the Hot and the Cold as fundamental concepts used to establish his cosmological system.Through this comparison,I indicate that the similarity between ancient Chinese and Western traditions is far more significant than what people are used to imagining.     

Perversion and infancy and adolescence

Abstract

Studying the works of Freud and Lacan, the authors carried out research on perversion in childhood. Their work covered the perverse polymorphism of infantile sexuality and the perception of the anatomic difference between the sexes that leads the child to create sexual theories and fantasies. The phallic mother and the fetish are viewed as imaginary solutions directly related to the Oedipus and castration complexes. In perversion, a particular position is taken in relation to the Oedipus complex: a serious flaw occurs in the symbolization of the law, and the mechanisms of denial and disavowal take form. Sexuality requires a second “logical time,” separated from infancy by the latency period, in order to confirm (in action) that a fixed position of jouissance (enjoyment) has actually been established. This can only happen in a period after adolescent enhancement. The distinction between perverse traces and a perverse structure is made, taking into account the fact that, in the case of child analysis, the analyst should free the child from the family fantasy and help him/her to build his/her own fantasy.

Campos Santoro V. et al. Perversion und Kindheit und Adoleszenz.

Im Studium der Arbeiten von Freud und Lacan haben die Autoren Forschung über Perversion in der Kindheit gemacht. Die Studien behandeln den perversen Polymorphismus der infantilen Sexualität und die Wahrnehmung des anatomischen Unterschiedes zwischen den Geschlechtern, welche das Kind dazu führt, Sexual-Theorien und Phatasien zu schaffen.

Die phallische Mutter und der Fetisch werden als imaginäre Lösungen angesehen, die sich direkt auf den Ödipus- und Kastrations-Komplex beziehen. Bei der Perversion wird eine besondere Position in Bezug auf den Ödipus angenommen; ein ernsthafter Mangel tritt bei der Symbolisierung des Rechts auf; die Mechanismen der Verneinung und der Verleugnung bilden sich. Sexualität erfordert eine zweite “logische Zeit”, von der Kindheit durch die Latenz Periode getrennt, um (in der Handlung) zu bestätigen, daß eine fixierte Position der jouissance (Vergnügung) sich tatsächlich etabliert hat. Das kann sich nur in einer Periode nach der adoleszenten Verstärkung ereignen.

Es wird die Unterscheidung zwischen perversen Spuren und einer perversen Struktur gemacht, in Rechnung stellend, daß im Fall der Kinder-Analyse der Analytiker das Kind von der Familien-Phantasie befreien sollte und ihm/ihr helfen sollte, seine/ihre Phantasie auszubilden.

Campos Santoro V. Perversión e infancia y adolescencia.

Estudiando los trabajos de Freud y Lacan, los autores han investigado la perversión en la niñez. Los estudios cubren la sexualidad infantil perversa polimorfa y la percepción de la diferencia anatómica entre los sexos, que llevan al niño a crear teorías sexuales y fantasías.

La madre fálica y el fetiche son vistos como soluciones imaginarias relacionadas directamente con el complejo de Edipo y de castración. La perversión, toma una posición particular en relación al Edipo; un fallo importante tiene lugar en la simbolización de la ley; los mecanismos de negación y repudio toman forma. La sexualidad requiere un segundo “tiempo lógico” separado de la infancia por el periodo de latencia, para confirmar (en acto) que una posición fija de jouissance (goce) se ha establecido. Esto solo puede ocurrir en un periodo posterior a la intensificación adolescente.

La distinción entre las huellas perversas y la estructura perversa se ha hecho, teniendo en cuenta que, en el caso del análisis de niños, el analista debe librar al niño de la fantasía familiar y ayudar a el/ella a construir su propia fantasía.     

神圣、凡俗与净明、忠孝

本文结合有关宗教学理论,对宋元净明道所推崇的"净明"、"忠孝"概念进行了解析.作者以为:宋元净明道视世俗性的道德实践为"神圣"的宗教修炼,实与宗教学中的凡俗可以"转换"为神圣之理论相合;而净明道徒的这种"转换",则多与其个体的"宗教体验"有关.至于元代净明道借"无极"概念来释"净明",以"净明"为回复宇宙根源之境界,则合于宗教人经验到与万物的根源、终极的本体或神圣的世界契合之感.换言之,宋元净明道的"净明"、"忠孝"说,实与各种宗教的本质有着相通之处.