Predictors of intimacy in couples' discussions of relationship injuries: an observational study.

The interpersonal process model of intimacy (H. T. Reis & P. Shaver, 1988) proposes that self-disclosure and empathic responding form the basis of intimate interactions. This study examined this model in 102 community couples who completed intimacy measures following videotaped discussions about relationship injuries occurring both within and outside the relationship. Observational assessments of self-disclosure and empathic responding, as well as their respective components, were related to self-reported ratings of post-interaction intimacy. Men's own disclosure and empathic responding predicted their feelings of intimacy, whereas women's intimacy was predicted by their partner's disclosure and empathic responding. Self-disclosure and empathic responding appear to be important behavioral determinants of intimate feelings, but the manner in which they influence intimacy differs according to gender.     

Links between attachment orientations and dispositional and diary–based measures of disclosure in dating couples: A study of actor and partner effects

Issues concerning the influence of attachment characteristics on own and partner’s disclosure were addressed using a sample of 113 couples in medium–term dating relationships. Individual differences in attachment were assessed in terms of relationship anxiety and avoidance. Disposition to disclose was assessed using questionnaire measures of self–disclosure, relationship–focused disclosure, and the ability to elicit disclosure from the partner; in addition, structured diaries were used to assess aspects of disclosure (amount, intimacy, emotional tone, and satisfaction) in the context of couples’ everyday interactions. Couple–level analyses showed that avoidance strongly predicted dispositional measures of disclosure, whereas anxiety (particularly partner’s anxiety) was related to negative evaluations of everyday interactions. Interactive effects of attachment dimensions and gender were also obtained, highlighting the complexity of communication behavior. The results are discussed in terms of the goals and strategies associated with working models of attachment.     

Couple Relationship Distress and Observed Expression of Intimacy During Reminiscence About Positive Relationship Events

Satisfied couples report that positive, intimate communication is central to their relationship. We developed the positive reminiscence task, in which couples discuss positive relationship moments to assess communication of positive intimacy. The behavior and heart rate of 28 satisfied and 25 distressed couples were assessed during positive reminiscence and problem solving. As predicted, satisfied couples demonstrated higher rates of positive affect and dyadic intimacy than distressed couples during positive reminiscence, and these positive behaviors occurred at much lower rates during problem solving than positive reminiscence. However, the differences between distressed and satisfied couples were more marked on most assessed behaviors during problem solving rather than positive reminiscence. Two notable exceptions were that dyadic intimacy and sadness differed more between distressed and satisfied couples during positive reminiscence than problem solving. The positive reminiscence task assesses intimate behaviors in a manner likely to be useful in research and practice.     

IS SEXUAL ORIENTATION A MATTER OF CHOICE?

Ninety women in lesbian and heterosexual couples were compared on relationship values, views of same-gender and cross-gender intimate relationships, and perceived choice of sexual orientation. Both groups reported similar values, levels of self-esteem, and capacity for intimacy. The majority in both groups described their relationships with women as more emotionally and intellectually intimate than those with men. A majority of women in lesbian couples (58%) and a third of women in heterosexual couples reported choosing the orientation of their current sexual relationship. Women with male partners did not perceive major differences between homosexual and heterosexual relationships, citing sexual attraction as the primary reason they chose a male partner. In contrast, many women with female partners characterized lesbian relationships as more intimate and equal, and less gender-role stereotyped, frequently citing these characteristics, along with sexual attraction, as reasons for their relationship preference.     

On the risk of being a cultural chameleon: variations in collective self-esteem across social interactions

In the present study the authors used an event-contingent daily recording strategy, the Rochester Interaction Record, to examine the relation of perceived evaluations of a multicultural person's heritage group to the nature and quality of his or her social interactions. Hierarchical linear modeling showed that having an interaction partner who positively evaluated one's heritage culture was associated with significantly enhanced interaction intimacy, disclosure, and quality, as well as with feelings of personal acceptance. Moderator analyses revealed that individuals who possessed a chameleon-like cultural identity and those who had low public collective self-esteem were particularly reactive to how their heritage group was being evaluated.     

Perceptions of risk in intimacy and social participation

The present study examined the relations between individuals' social lives and the risks they perceived in being intimate with others. Participants maintained a variant of the Rochester Interaction Record (Wheeler & Nezlek, 1977) and completed the Risk in Intimacy Inventory (Pilkington & Richardson, 1988). The results indicated that, compared to people who perceived less risk, people who perceived more risk in intimacy had less rewarding social lives on measures of socio-emotional and socio-instrumental dimensions of interaction. Risk in intimacy concerns were particularly salient for women in their interactions with the opposite sex and for men in their interactions with the same sex. In addition, the statistical associations between perceptions of risk in intimacy and characteristics of interactions within close opposite-sex personal relationships varied as a function of participants' sex and the nature of this personal relationship.     

Recovery from conflict and revival of intimacy in cohabiting couples

Couples who seek a stable and satisfying relationship must recover emotionally and reestablish their intimate connection after their conflicts are over. In a 3‐week diary study, 100 cohabiting couples reported on their daily moods, intimacy, relationship satisfaction, and conflicts. Results indicated that on days following a conflict, couple partners have worse mood, less satisfaction, and less self‐disclosure than on other days. Attachment security and intimacy partially moderated the ability of relationship partners to recover positive and reduce negative affect on days following conflict. Partners of anxiously attached individuals experienced more pronounced postconflict changes in mood and intimacy than partners of securely attached individuals. More intimacy in postconflict interactions was associated with a faster recovery from conflict.     

THE DISCLOSURE-LIKING RELATIONSHIP

Two experiments were conducted to investigate the effects of a perceiver's own disclosure on attraction for self-disclosing others. In Experiment 1, female undergraduates selected two topics and disclosed information on them to a confederate partner. This disclosure occurred either before or after the confederate disclosed information on three different topics that were either high or low in intimacy. Based on self-perception theory, it was predicted and found that intimacy of the subject's self-disclosure would be positively correlated with attraction for the confederate when the subject disclosed before her partner but not when she disclosed after her partner. A second prediction that subjects would be attracted toward a highly intimate partner only if they had previously disclosed was not confirmed. Instead, attraction for the confederate was greater when she had disclosed before the subject and when she had disclosed intimately. Experiment 2 varied the intimacy of the response of a partner to the subject's initial self-disclosure and whether this response dealt with the same topics or different topics. It was found that attraction was greater for an intimate than a nonintimate partner when topics for disclosure were the same. When disclosure topics were different, there was no significant difference in attraction for the intimate and nonintimate partner. Results are discussed in terms of their implications for the disclosure-liking hypothesis.     

Perceived intimacy of expressed emotion

Research on norms for emotional expression and self-disclosure provided the basis for two hypotheses concerning the perceived intimacy of emotional self-disclosure. The first hypothesis was that the perceived intimacy of negative emotional disclosure would be greater than that of positive emotional disclosure; the second was that disclosures of more intense emotional states would be perceived as more intimate than disclosures of less intense emotional states for both negative and positive disclosures. Both hypotheses received support when male students in Canada rated the perceived intimacy of self-disclosures that were equated for topic and that covered a comprehensive sample of emotions and a range of emotional intensities. The effects were observed across all the topics of disclosure examined.     

情绪分享和感知恋人回应对亲密关系满意度的影响

研究通过问卷星收集了150对异性恋情侣的情绪分享、感知恋人回应、亲密关系满意度的数据,并采用行动者-对象互依模型进行统计分析。结果显示：（1）情绪分享通过感知恋人回应的中介作用影响亲密关系满意度。女性的积极情绪分享与男性的消极情绪分享直接正向影响自身亲密关系满意度。（2）男性的积极情绪分享正向影响女性的亲密关系满意度。研究揭示了亲密关系中情绪分享和感知恋人回应对关系满意度的影响特点。     

In Search of Intimate Autonomy

Cases were analyzed and discussed in which couples had autonomy but not intimacy, pseudointimacy but not autonomy, and both intimacy and autonomy. Guidelines for establishing intimate autonomy were proffered, and psychotherapeutic intervention for couples dysfunctional for intimate autonomy was discussed. The guidelines included having mutual respect for the partner's individuality, mutual areas of interest, basic philosophical agreement, desire to share with the partner, wanting the ultimate good for the partner, and accepting what is unchangeable in the self and the partner. The myth and reality of intimate autonomy are examined.     

A Multifaceted and Dyadic Examination of Intimate Relationship Quality during Pregnancy: Implications for Global Relationship Satisfaction

Understanding how couples navigate and negotiate the challenges and demands of pregnancy has important implications for family health. The aim of this study was to apply a multidimensional model of intimate relationship quality in a sample of 154 pregnant, cohabitating couples, to investigate the association between a range of intimate relationship processes (i.e., emotional intimacy, conflict management, sexual quality, received respect and acceptance, and received support) and the global relationship satisfaction of each partner. Semistructured clinical interviews were administered to each partner assessing multiple qualities of the relationship, and participants completed home surveys of global relationship satisfaction each day for 14 days. Results demonstrated that multiple dimensions of the intimate relationship were associated with greater relationship satisfaction. Some processes (e.g., degree of emotional intimacy and closeness, conflict management) had larger effects on relationship satisfaction than others (e.g., quality of the sexual relationship). Furthermore, some processes were more important for maternal than paternal satisfaction (e.g., emotional intimacy, support, respect). Finally, results varied, to some degree, as a function of whether parents were transitioning to parenthood for the first time. We discuss the implications of adopting a multidimensional approach to studying the specific relationship processes associated with global relationship satisfaction and present implications for clinicians working with couples navigating the transition into parenthood.     

Intimacy Behaviors and Relationship Satisfaction for Cohabitors: Intimate Sacrifices Are Not Always Beneficial

Guided by interdependence theory, the authors examined how relationship satisfaction is explained by intimate behavior sacrifices in a sample of cohabitors (N = 200). Specifically, it was predicted that characteristics of intimate behavior sacrifices, such as ease and partner appreciation should alter the association of sacrifice frequency and relationship satisfaction. The pattern that emerged demonstrates lower satisfaction for cohabitors when they frequently made intimate sacrifices and their partners were less appreciative of the sacrifices. When making frequent, but less appreciated, intimacy sacrifices for their partner, cohabitors may struggle with intimacy behaviors that are partner oriented.     

What We Talk About Matters: Content Moderates Cognitive Depletion in Interracial Interactions

The antecedents and consequences of intergroup interactions have been well studied, but interaction content—what partners actually talk about—has not. In the experiment we report here, interaction content moderated well-documented self-regulation effects (i.e., cognitive depletion) among White participants interacting with a Black partner. Specifically, White individuals participated in a video email interaction with an ostensible Black or White partner who broached topics systematically varying in intimacy. Greater cognitive depletion was evident after interacting with a Black partner relative to a White partner, but only after discussing more intimate topics. When conversation topics aligned with Whites’ preferences to avoid intimacy in interracial interactions, depletion effects were reduced. Thus, interaction content, which has been largely ignored in intergroup interaction research, has important implications for intergroup interaction.     

Escalation and Regulation of Emotional Arousal in Couples Predicts Relationship Satisfaction Concurrently and 25 Years Later

Relationship distress and divorce are major risk factors for the development or exacerbation of psychopathology and psychosocial impairments. Given that heightened negative emotions within couples’ interactions may portend negative relationship outcomes, it is critical to understand how emotions unfold across a conversation and how partners may influence each other’s immediate emotional experiences. This study examined whether these regulatory dynamics within one interaction predicted relationship satisfaction concurrently and 25 years later. Vocally‐encoded emotional arousal (f₀) was measured during couples’ (N = 25 couples) conversations about a relationship issue. Across different analytical strategies, results demonstrate that one partner’s f₀ dynamics had immediate and long‐term associations with the other partner’s satisfaction. Partners were less satisfied if the other partner (a) expressed higher f₀ overall and (b) escalated more in f₀ across the conversation. Yet, partners were more satisfied when their f₀ escalated across the conversation. Also, women specifically were more satisfied if their f₀ remained elevated longer before regulating back to their emotional baseline. Thus, higher f₀ was associated with higher satisfaction in the same partner, but associated with less satisfaction in the other partner—particularly when these emotions come from women. It may be that partners have to decide whether to prioritize expressing their emotions fully or limit expression in the service of their partner’s happiness. These findings challenge us to think of ways to address this “win–lose” scenario so that couples can balance both partners’ emotional needs and preserve relationship quality across the life span.     

Methods for Connectedness

SUMMARY

There are prerequisites that must be achieved developmen-tally before individuals are capable of co-creating healthy intimacy in adult relationships. Thus, therapists often have to work to help client systems overcome failures of maturation. In these kinds of therapeutic encounters the therapist acts as a developmental partner. By designing compensatory experiences, the therapist can help partners fill gaps in early development and education that operate to sabotage loving relationships. This paper offers examples of how levels of moral development and social-perspective taking can be utilized within a transpersonal approach to help couples achieve more satisfying intimate connections.