The complementarity of humility hypothesis: Individual,relational, and physiological effects of mutually humble partners

Abstract

We report two studies of romantic couples that examine the interactive effects of actor and partner humility on individual, relational, and physiological well-being. Using both longitudinal (Study 1) and physiological (Study 2) methods from two samples of romantic couples, we explored the interactive effects of actor and partner humility. Individuals in dyads with complementary high humility reported better mental health over time following a major life transition, the birth of their first child, in Study 1 and higher relationship satisfaction and lower physiological responses (i.e. blood pressure) following the discussion of a topic of disagreement in Study 2. These results suggest that being humble is beneficial when one has a humble partner, but being arrogant – especially within a disagreement with one’s partner – could undermine the benefits of humility. That is, the benefits of humility are greatest in dyads in which both partners are humble.     

Humble persons are more helpful than less humble persons: Evidence from three studies

Connections between humility and other prosocial qualities led us to develop a humility–helpfulness hypothesis. In three studies, humble persons were more helpful than less humble persons. In Study 1, participants (n?=?117) completed self-report measures of humility, the Big Five, and helpfulness. In Study 2, participants (n?=?90) completed an implicit measure of humility and were presented with an unexpected opportunity to help someone in need. In Study 3, participants (n?=?103) completed self-report and implicit measures of humility and were presented a similar helping opportunity. Humility and helpfulness correlated positively when personality and impression management were controlled. Humble participants helped more than did less humble participants even when agreeableness and desirable responding were statistically controlled. Further, implicit humility uniquely predicted helping behavior in an altruistic motivation condition.     

Intellectual humility predicts COVID-19 preventive practices through greater adoption of data-driven information and feelings of responsibility

Preventive health practices have been crucial to mitigating viral spread during the COVID-19 pandemic. In two studies, we examined whether intellectual humility—openness to one's existing knowledge being inaccurate—related to greater engagement in preventive health practices (social distancing, handwashing, mask-wearing). In Study 1, we found that intellectually humble people were more likely to engage in COVID-19 preventive practices. Additionally, this link was driven by intellectually humble people's tendency to adopt information from data-driven sources (e.g., medical experts) and greater feelings of responsibility over the outcomes of COVID-19. In Study 2, we found support for these relationships over time (2 weeks). Additionally, Study 2 showed that the link between intellectual humility and preventive practices was driven by a greater tendency to adopt data-driven information when encountering it, rather than actively seeking out such information. These findings reveal the promising role of intellectual humility in making well-informed decisions during public health crises.     

For better and for worse: everyday social comparisons between romantic partners

The authors examined the frequency, direction, and impact of social comparisons between romantic partners. Comparisons were expected to occur on a daily basis, owing to regular interactions between partners. To the extent that one empathizes and shares outcomes with one's partner, one might respond more positively to upward than to downward comparisons. Study 1a was an experience-sampling study in which participants reported comparisons made to their spouse over 2 weeks. Study 1b examined reactions to the most significant comparisons made during the experience-sampling study. Participants reported making comparisons to their romantic partner more than once a day on average and experienced more positive responses to upward than to downward comparisons. Study 2 demonstrated that participants empathized and shared outcomes with their partner to a greater extent than with a friend. Study 3 confirmed that participants responded more positively to upward than to downward comparisons even for domains high in self-relevance and even when the comparison had negative self-evaluative implications. These results suggest that, owing to higher levels of empathy and shared fate with partners, comparisons function differently in romantic than in other relationships.     

How do I love thee? Let me count the words: the social effects of expressive writing

Writing about emotional experiences is associated with a host of positive outcomes. This study extended the expressive-writing paradigm to the realm of romantic relationships to examine the social effects of writing. For 3 consecutive days, one person from each of 86 dating couples either wrote about his or her deepest thoughts and feelings about the relationship or wrote about his or her daily activities. In the days before and after writing, instant messages were collected from the couples. Participants who wrote about their relationship were significantly more likely to still be dating their romantic partners 3 months later. Linguistic analyses of the instant messages revealed that participants and their partners used significantly more positive and negative emotion words in the days following the expressive-writing manipulation if the participants had written about their relationship than if they had written about their daily activities. Increases in positive emotion words partially mediated the relation between expressive writing and relationship stability.     

Behavior expectations in cross‐sex friendships,same‐sex friendships,and romantic relationships

Abstract In 2 studies, university students from the United States rated the importance of 43 behavior expectations about their cross‐sex friends, same‐sex friends and romantic partners. In Study 1, all 399 participants had a current romantic partner, whereas in Study 2, romantic partner status varied across the 165 participants. Participants always rated their expectations for romantic partners higher than for either type of friend, and expectations for behaviors promoting emotional closeness were always rated higher than expectations about behaviors promoting social companionship or relationship positivity. In Study 2, expectations for cross‐sex friends were rated lower and more similar to same‐sex friends when participants had a current romantic partner than when they did not.     

Pulling the strings: Effects of friend and parent opinions on dating choices

The current study examined how dating choices are affected when individuals are faced with social network opinions that are in agreement or disagreement about the quality of potential dates. In a virtual dating game paradigm, participants spoke to 2 potential romantic partners online and received positive and/or negative feedback ostensibly from their friend and parent about 1 of the partners. The study employed a 2 (parent opinion: approve, disapprove) × 2 (friend opinion: approve, disapprove) × 2 (interaction partner: evaluated target, control target—within subjects) mixed factorial design. Friend opinion influenced who the participants liked, whereas parental opinion was influential when participants relied on their parent for more resources than their friend. In the end, though, only friend opinion predicted dating choice.     

Narcissus Reflects: Memory Distortion in Response to Ego-Relevant Feedback among High- and Low-Narcissistic Men

Memory distortion in response to ego-enhancing or ego-threatening feedback was investigated in 67 men selected for their responses on the Narcissistic Personality Inventory (NPI) (Raskin & Hall, 1979). Participants underwent a telephone interview with a woman confederate posing as a potential dating partner. Immediately after the interview, participants reported their perceptions of the interview and recalled their histories of romantic relationships. One week later, participants learned that the woman had selected or rejected them as a partner. Participants again recalled the interview and reported their dating histories. Both high- and low-NPI men displayed significant outcome-congruent distortions in recall of the interview. Low-NPI men recalled more negative romantic histories in response to rejection and more positive romantic histories in response to selection. By contrast, high-NPI men recalled more positive romantic histories in response to rejection and more humble histories in response to selection. Mediation analyses indicated that self-aggrandizing memory distortions in response to rejection buffered self-esteem from the effects of rejection in narcissistic men. Discussion focuses on narcissism and the role of memory distortion as an automatic self-esteem regulation strategy.     

达者何以兼济天下：高阶层再分配偏向的心理机制及谦卑的作用

一些欧美研究发现高阶层者与低阶层者相比再分配偏向更低, 但是这一结论尚缺少跨文化一致性的证据, 而且对于这一现象的心理机制和干预策略的探讨也相对不足。基于此, 本研究通过3个子研究分别来关注我国民众再分配偏向的阶层差异及其心理机制, 并探讨可能的干预策略。结果发现：(1)与西方社会的情形相似, 在中国社会高阶层者的再分配偏向也显著低于低阶层者; (2)社会阶层对再分配偏向的影响, 部分是通过贫富差距归因倾向起作用的：与低阶层者相比, 高阶层者更倾向于将贫富差距归因于能力、努力、志向或抱负等个体内部因素, 进而再分配偏向更低; (3)通过启动高阶层者谦卑的心态, 能够降低其贫富差距内归因倾向, 进而提升其再分配偏向。此结果验证了社会阶层不平等维持模型的重要观点, 同时也为推动社会再分配、促进发展成果共享等提供了一定的社会治理启示。     

Altruism predicts mating success in humans

In order for non‐kin altruism to evolve, altruists must receive fitness benefits for their actions that outweigh the costs. Several researchers have suggested that altruism is a costly signal of desirable qualities, such that it could have evolved by sexual selection. In two studies, we show that altruism is broadly linked with mating success. In Study 1, participants who scored higher on a self‐report altruism measure reported they were more desirable to the opposite sex, as well as reported having more sex partners, more casual sex partners, and having sex more often within relationships. Sex moderated some of these relationships, such that altruism mattered more for men's number of lifetime and casual sex partners. In Study 2, participants who were willing to donate potential monetary winnings (in a modified dictator dilemma) reported having more lifetime sex partners, more casual sex partners, and more sex partners over the past year. Men who were willing to donate also reported having more lifetime dating partners. Furthermore, these patterns persisted, even when controlling for narcissism, Big Five personality traits, and socially desirable responding. These results suggest that altruists have higher mating success than non‐altruists and support the hypothesis that altruism is a sexually selected costly signal of difficult‐to‐observe qualities.     

My Love,How I Wish You Were By My Side: Maintaining Intercontinental Long-Distance Relationships in Taiwan

The purpose of this qualitative research was to explore how couples in Taiwan maintain intercontinental long-distance relationships. Four participants from a long-distance online forum were interviewed and asked to share their stories of long-distance dating. Their stories were then analyzed based on a narrative research method, and the following questions were explored with the participants: the impact of distance on the relationship, maintaining long-distance relationships, and reflections on long-distance dating. Findings suggested that distance had a large impact on couples, including thoughts of ending the relationship, loneliness, insecurity, and distrust. Themes the participants discussed included the importance of technology, face-to-face visitations, commitment, romantic beliefs, and diverse ways to maintain relationships. Participants also reported high expenses, time differences, and technological limitations as difficulties. Despite these difficulties, participants described creating meanings around the long-distance relationships by realizing the relationships were ultimately worthwhile, and for many couples, a necessary process to grow. Based on the results, the researcher proposes that therapists use narrative therapy in order to work with couples in long-distance relationships. By helping clients externalize the problem through opening up new possibilities for them to describe their difficulties, clients can begin to develop new ways of understanding themselves and others. A discussion with regards to how individuals in Chinese cultures manage conflicts in romantic relationships is included to remind therapists to be culturally sensitive when managing conflicts in collectivistic cultures, which have a tendency towards indirectness, unassertiveness, and lack of confrontation.     

Friendship and romance across the U.S. political divide: Hindrance or help for outgroup political attitudes?

Consistent with the intergroup contact literature, cross-political relationships (e.g., friendships or romantic relationships between different partisans) may help reduce inter-political group prejudice. Given that unfavorable attitudes based on the political group membership are particularly heightened at present in the United States, we explored whether having cross-political friendships (Study 1) or romantic relationships (Study 2) predict more positive interpersonal or intergroup attitudes among American Democrats and Republicans. In Study 1, using a social network measure (N = 301), where participants reported on their closest friends, cross-political (versus same-political) friendship was associated with less positive interpersonal attitudes when this relationship was unsatisfying. Having any (versus no) or more (versus less) cross-political group friendships was not associated with holding more positive intergroup attitudes. In Study 2, cross-political romantic relationships were examined (N = 392). Having a cross- (versus same-) political romantic relationship was associated with relatively less positive attitudes toward the political outgroup via lower empathy when relationship satisfaction was low. Study findings highlight the potential limitations of the beneficial effects of intergroup contact.     

Good Enough for an Affair. Self‐Enhancement of Attractiveness,Interest in Potential Mates and Popularity as a Mate

Using data from the Berlin Speed Dating Study, we tested rival hypotheses concerning the effects of self‐enhancement of attractiveness on dating outcomes. Three hundred eighty‐two participants took part in one of the 17 speed‐dating sessions. After each speed‐dating interaction, participants indicated how interesting they found the respective person as a long‐term and short‐term partner. Using social relations analyses, we computed perceiver effects (being more or less choosy) and target effects (being rated as more or less interesting) of long‐term and short‐term partner ratings. Self‐enhancement was operationalized as the discrepancy between self‐rated attractiveness and four components of actual attractiveness (observer‐rated facial and vocal attractiveness, height and body mass index). Results indicated that self‐enhancers were less choosy with respect to their interest for short‐term partners, which was especially true for men, but more choosy with respect to long‐term partners. With regard to popularity as a mate, potential partners indicated that they found self‐enhancers more interesting as short‐term partners but not as long‐term partners. As self‐enhancement is a key component of narcissism, these results are consistent with findings that narcissists perceive many sexual affairs as an achievement, while preferring selected ‘trophy’ long‐term partners, and narcissists have a charming appeal for short‐term, but not lasting, social relationships. Copyright © 2015 European Association of Personality Psychology     

Missing a romantic partner: A prototype analysis

In this study, a prototype analysis of romantic missing was conducted. College‐age participants in the United States generated features of missing a partner (Study 1) and rated their centrality (Study 2). In a reaction time task, participants made category judgments for central features more quickly than for noncentral features (Study 3). In recognition and recall tasks, central features were more salient in participants’ memory, and participants evaluated individuals experiencing central features in vignettes as missing their partners more (Study 4). A prototype‐based measure of missing administered to individuals in long‐distance relationships (Study 5) correlated with commitment and attachment dimensions but only weakly with loneliness. Finally, level of missing differed based on whether individuals were in a geographically distant (vs. proximal) relationships (Study 6).     

Did I do that? Self–esteem–related differences in reactions to romantic partners’ moods

This study examined the relation between self–esteem and responses to a romantic partner's moods. College students in dating relationships imagined one scenario in which their romantic partners were in a positive mood and one in which their partners were in a negative mood. A probable source of each mood was suggested to half the participants. Participants reported their cognitive, affective, behavioral, and attributional responses to each scenario. When the partner's mood was negative and ambiguous in cause, participants with low self–esteem felt more responsible for the mood, more rejected, and more hostile than did those with high self–esteem. A mediational analysis suggested a dependency regulation explanation of the results, such that low self–esteem people perceived self–directed negativity in their partners’ bad moods and in turn responded with more negativity toward their partners.     

Sociosexuality and Romantic Partner Choice

ABSTRACT In three studies, we explored how individual differences in sociosexual orientation systematically relate to the types of attributes people prefer in romantic partners. In Investigation 1, individuals rated the importance of 15 partner attributes. Two factors emerged: personal/parenting qualities and attractiveness/social visibility. Individuals who possessed a restricted sociosexual orientation rated attributes that loaded highly on the former factor as being more important than those that loaded highly on the second one, whereas the reverse was true for unrestricted individuals. In Investigation 2, individuals evaluated two prospective romantic partners, one who was described as highly attractive and socially visible but less desirable in terms of personal/parenting qualities and one who had the opposite set of attributes. Unrestricted individuals tended to select the former partner, whereas restricted individuals chose the latter one. Investigation 3 examined the attributes actually possessed by their romantic partners. Unrestricted individuals were dating partners who were more socially visible and attractive, whereas restricted individuals were dating partners who were more responsible, faithful/loyal, and affectionate. Results are discussed in terms of an evolutionary model that links sociosexuality to mate selection.     

Extended contact through cross‐group romantic relationships

Cross‐group romantic relationships are an extremely intimate and often maligned form of intergroup contact. Yet, according to intergroup contact theory, these relationships have the potential to improve the intergroup attitudes of others via extended contact. This study combines the interpersonal and intergroup literatures to examine the outcomes associated with knowing a partner in a cross‐group romantic relationship. Results suggest that cross‐group romantic partners encounter greater disapproval toward their relationships than same‐group partners and, as a result, their relationships are perceived more negatively. Nevertheless, extended contact with cross‐group partners, controlling for participants' cross‐group friendships and romantic relationships, predicts more positive attitudes toward cross‐group dating and positive intergroup attitudes in general, mediated by perceived ingroup norms toward cross‐group relationships.     

Feigning Romantic Interest: The Role of Self-Monitoring

In two studies, we examined the extent to which high and low self-monitoring individuals successfully feigned romantic interest in potential dating partners. In Study 1, high self-monitoring men and women reported they would be better at, and would derive more enjoyment from, feigning interest in two different relationship initiation contexts. In Study 2, high self-monitoring men and women were videotaped while they tried to feign interest or lack of interest in an attractive opposite-sex person. Raters evaluated participants' verbal and nonverbal behavior on measures of perceived interest/liking and behavioral cues known to signal romantic interest. When they feigned interest, high self-monitoring men and women were rated as conveying greater interest than low self-monitors through the verbal channel. Additional analyses identified the specific verbal cues that did and did not mediate links between self-monitoring and ratings of verbal interest.     

Mutual Grooming in Human Dyadic Relationships: An Ethological Perspective

Despite its widespread practice among primates writ large, social scientists have given mutual grooming among humans little attention. This research provides an important first step in describing mutual grooming among humans. A scale was developed to measure self-reported giving and receiving of grooming. In Study 1, 184 female and 94 male participants first indicated their closest emotional relationship (for example, romantic partner, best friend, etcetera). They then completed the grooming measure pertaining to that emotionally close target person. Finally, they completed indices of relationship trust, relationship satisfaction, and parental/familial affection. Individuals who focused on their romantic partners (N = 134) reported more mutual grooming than individuals who focused on other types of relationships. Relationship satisfaction, previous experience of familial affection, and trust were positively correlated with mutual grooming for romantically involved individuals. Study 2 (N = 71 heterosexual couples) explored psychological correlates of mutual grooming within romantic dyads. Individuals with more promiscuous attitudes and those who scored high on the anxiety subscale of an adult attachment style measure reported grooming their partners most frequently. Findings were consistent with several proposed functions of grooming: (a) potential parental-investment indicator, (b) developing trust, and (c) courtship/flirtation—all of which play roles in pair-bonding. At first glance, humans may not appear to groom each other with the same fervor as other primates. However, we posit that humans are, in actuality, groomers par excellence.