The impossibility of forgiveness: shame fantasies as instigators of vengefulness in Euripides' Medea

Unforgivability in Euripides' Medea is explored in the context of intrapsychic forces favoring disruption and narcissistic withdrawal and precluding the influence of forces favoring repair of bonds, not necessarily to the betrayer, but to the social and moral order. The forces underlying disruption and withdrawal operate to such an extent that forgiveness and cooperation with the social order become impossible. Euripides' literary insights are explored with the purpose of deepening and extending the psychoanalytic understanding of shame, shame fantasies, projective identification, and vengefulness as they bear on the problem of forgiveness. Three types of shame fantasy are pertinent to the transformation of Medea's mental state from one of anguished and disjointed shame to diabolical vengefulness: anticipatory paranoid shame, the projective identification of shame, and withdrawal as a defense against shame.     

Self-Defense against Verbal Assault: Shame, Anger, and the Social Bond

With many years of experience and refinement, the arts of self-defense against physical assault are highly developed. Without an effective theory and a useful practice, there is little in the way of self-defense against verbal assault. For THEORY, I draw upon ideas from aikido, family systems theory, and the sociology of emotions. Since unacknowledged shame seems to generate rage and damage social bonds, I emphasize the management of shame, anger, and bonds. To illustrate the meaning of these principles, I offer several episodes as examples, using the METHOD of discourse analysis. I apply this theory and method to the PRACTICE of psychotherapy by describing some rudimentary principles of defense of self against verbal aggression, especially the subtle aggression of innuendo. Psychotherapy is often an arena of verbal aggression by both therapist and client, even though it is usually unintentional and outside of awareness.     

Adolescents' implicit theories predict desire for vengeance after peer conflicts: correlational and experimental evidence

Why do some adolescents respond to interpersonal conflicts vengefully, whereas others seek more positive solutions? Three studies investigated the role of implicit theories of personality in predicting violent or vengeful responses to peer conflicts among adolescents in Grades 9 and 10. They showed that a greater belief that traits are fixed (an entity theory) predicted a stronger desire for revenge after a variety of recalled peer conflicts (Study 1) and after a hypothetical conflict that specifically involved bullying (Study 2). Study 3 experimentally induced a belief in the potential for change (an incremental theory), which resulted in a reduced desire to seek revenge. This effect was mediated by changes in bad-person attributions about the perpetrators, feelings of shame and hatred, and the belief that vengeful ideation is an effective emotion-regulation strategy. Together, the findings illuminate the social-cognitive processes underlying reactions to conflict and suggest potential avenues for reducing violent retaliation in adolescents.     

Scenes of shame,social roles,and the play with masks

This article explores various scenes of shame, raising the questions of what shame discloses about the self and how this self-disclosure takes place. Thereby, the common idea that shame discloses the self’s debasement will be challenged. The dramatic dialectics of showing and hiding display a much more ambiguous, dynamic self-image as result of an interactive evaluation of oneself by oneself and others. Seeing oneself seen contributes to the sense of who one becomes. From being absorbed in what one does, one might suddenly become self-aware, shift viewpoints and feel pressed to put on masks. In putting on a mask, one relates to oneself in distancing oneself from oneself. In being at once a moral agent and a performing actor with an audience and norms in mind, one embodies and transcends the social roles one takes. In addition to the feeling of shame, in which the self finds itself passively reflected, the self’s active reflections on its shame are to be taken into account. As examples from Milan Kundera, Shakespeare’s King Lear, a line from Kingsley Amis, a speech by Vaclav Havel and Adam Smith’s Theory of Moral Sentiments indicate, self-(re)presentation in the public and the private sphere is a complex hermeneutical process with surprising twists.     

How,when, and why transgressors’ narcissism affects motivation to apologize (or not)

Four studies were conducted to test the association between transgressors’ narcissism and their motivation to apologize or not, the extent to which victims’ vengeful and forgiving feedback moderated the association, and whether guilt and shame mediated the moderated association. Overall, narcissism was negatively related to apology and positively related to nonapology. However, these associations were qualified by victim feedback such that those with higher degrees of narcissism who received vengeful feedback were more nonapologetic and aggressive toward victims compared to those who received forgiving feedback. Finally, shame did not explain the moderated relation, however, the results for guilt were mixed.     

2. Seminars with Executives on Human Relations in the United States Government

Abstract

The feeling of shame is very difficult to recognize, to reveal, to face, and to work through. Starting with some expressions of human aggression, the authors underline the difference in treating feelings of guilt and feelings of shame. The authors detail the elaboration of shame in group psychotherapy with released prisoners of war and with war veterans and review important analytic theoretical concepts of shame, projective identification, empathy, and countertransference. They examine the importance of unlocking and identifying the silent shame, as well as the mourning process essential to working through the burden of catastrophic shame. Special counter transference problems with PTSD patients are analyzed.     

Problem Anger in Psychotherapy: An Emotion-Focused Perspective on Hate, Rage, and Rejecting Anger

This paper explores applies emotion-focused theory, for the first time, to the emotions of hate, rage, and destructive anger. The general case formulation proposed in this paper is that these emotions are always an elaboration of secondary anger. The body of the paper describes three clinical case formulations. First, problem anger is described in terms of an individual’s self-criticism. Second, we present a form of secondary anger, in which hostility and rage are reactive feelings to avoid more vulnerable (primary) experiences. An unfortunate example of this is has been described as a common underlying process in domestic violence. A alternate manifestation of secondary anger results from the deterioration of what may have initially been adaptive anger; thus, excessive arousal and the loss of meaning or focus that one’s anger embodied also leads to rage or destructive anger. Finally, the experience and expression of hate is described as a primary maladaptive and/or instrumental anger. This appears in-session particularly among those with certain personality disorders. The paper highlights implications for research and practice.     

Shame in pastoral psychotherapy

This essay contends that pastoral psychotherapy is an arena of shame for clients and therapists. If unacknowledged, shame can undermine therapy and injure all participants. The approach is to provide a succinct typology of shame, to describe how shame is woven into the structure and process of psychotherapy, and to offer seven ways therapists can work creatively with shame in psychotherapy and turn it into a healing resource.     

Castration and Conformity

ABSTRACT

Castration anxiety is a contentious issue for contemporary psychoanalysis and necessarily occupies a central position in the theory that Freud developed, at the crossroad between the individual and his desires, the individual and his sexuality, and the individual and civilization. In this wider sense, castration anxiety describes a state of mind in which individuals, women as well as men, must battle throughout the course of their lives against limitations and, hence, so-called safe pleasures (security, reproduction, family, etc.) brought about through the constraints imposed on them by civilization. From this perspective, castration anxiety can be seen as a primary gesture toward a sexuality that becomes enmeshed in conflict and obscured by a sense of shame and guilt. Exploring the works of contemporary British artist Sarah Lucas, the Italian writer A. Moravia, and the Italian director M. Ferreri, followed by a series of brief clinical vignettes, I underline and discuss the oppositional and unfulfillable search for lust encapsulated in Freud’s castration anxiety concept and the eternal mysteriousness of sexuality.     

Working with shame in psychoanalytic treatment

Shame is a central human affect, reflecting feelings of defect, inferiority, and failure of the self. It is, therefore, a proper focus for psychoanalytic treatment. Beginning with Freud's seminal attention to narcissism and the ego ideal, the possibility for studying shame and its relation to the ego ideal (i.e. the loving function of the superego) was inherent in psychoanalytic theory, but Freud's pursuit of intrapsychic conflict and the punitive superego postponed further elaboration of shame. Interest in the relation of the ego ideal to the superego (Hartmann, 1950; Reich, 1954), and in the ideal self (Sandler et al., 1963; Schafer, 1960, 1967) opened the way to further study of shame. Kohut's contributions, with their focus on narcissism and self-pathology, have given a language and perspective on self-deficits allowing elaboration of shame's place in psychoanalytic treatment. In this paper, I have focused on the treatment of shame in two patients. I suggest that shame lies at the very center of the narcissistic patient's pathology, with primary internal shaming (directed at the self's failures and inadequacies) permeating all aspects of the treatment. For the neurotic patient, shame is more circumscribed, reflecting partial failures of the self; it tends to be reactive, relating to passive withdrawal from internal conflict and castration fears, and is intermixed with oedipal manifestations. I have described clinical sequences that demonstrate my approach to working with shame in each of these patients. In both cases, the task is to recognize, acknowledge, accept, and investigate the patient's shame. Only after such empathic investigation can underlying conflictual and genetic derivatives be productively pursued. This sequence is often intuitively followed in analysis, but in this paper I have attempted to articulate more systematically shame's role in psychoanalytic treatment.     

A View of the violence contained in chronic fatigue syndrome

In this paper I ask whether there might be any one particular psychopathology likely to be linked specifically with the physical illness known as chronic fatigue syndrome (CFS) or myalgic encephalomyelitis (ME), and whether CFS/ME aids and abets and 'fits' an original mental state. I think the question cannot yet be answered. However it is my hypothesis that in some personality structures the onset of CFS/ME following a physical illness exacerbates negativity and is an aspect of ordinary depression where there is a lowering of energy levels and a loss of zest for life, or it may reveal the pathological aspect of unresolved rage.
Depending on the degree of pathological disturbance, working with and through the rage may or may not result in a resolution of the symptoms of ME. In this paper I consider some of the problems in the transference and countertransference relationship, which make it extremely difficult to separate out reality from phantasy. There is then the further problem of the denial of the psyche by the patient as part of the violence inherent in the illness.
One case is presented, an example of ME in a borderline male patient in whom resolution could not be achieved.     

Psychosomatics: a current overview

The term 'psychosomatic' has typically defined a series of illnesses in which somatic injury breaks out from psychic conflict not recognized as such. Currently, health is considered the only psychosomatic state of integration of mind and soma: an ideal state of integration. Somatic pathology is an effect of mind/body splitting. In the heterogeneous 'field of psychosomatics' interaction between psyche and soma ranges from classical psychosomatic illness to sporadic episodes in which the body has responded to an inability to process mental conflict. The author briefly reviews the development of psychoanalytic thought on psychosomatics in Argentina. He suggests the need to find appropriate conceptual tools to approach the mental structure underlying this pathology. He presents his ideas about the mental functioning of patients with somatization disorders. He introduces the concept of somatic event as a restitution phenomenon through which the subject attempts to re-establish self-integration and links with reality. He also offers some reflections on temporality and on changes in psychoanalytic technique with these patients. A clinical case illustrates his ideas.     

Flaubert's Madame Bovary: a study in envy and revenge

Flaubert's Emma Bovary is one of the most convincingly realized characters in modern literature. Her husband, Charles, a rural doctor, loves her dearly, but he is dull, ineffectual, and boring. Emma seems to hate him with a fury that knows no bounds. She betrays him sexually, ruins him financially, and ultimately destroys his very life. What drives her to such unmitigated rage? The authors identify evidence in the novel suggestive of a dynamic thrust for revenge along the lines described by Freud (1918) in "The Taboo of Virginity." Elements of narcissistic rage and a sense of entitlement intensify Emma's anger and vengefulness.     

The influence of extreme traumatization on body, mind and social relations

Extreme traumatization affects the individual's relation to others in several social and psychological ways. The post-traumatic experiences are characterized by helplessness, insecurity, anxiety, loss of basic trust, and fragmentation of perspectives on one's own life. Special considerations should be given to the destruction of the ability to regulate negative emotions (extreme fear, distress, anguish, anger, rage, shame) in relation to others and activate internal good and empathic object relations. Destruction of the capacity for symbolization of traumatic experience may threaten the mind with chaotic states against which the 'I' tries to defend itself and find a balanced psychic mise-en-scene. The authors emphasize three dimensions that the analyst should observe in his understanding of the traumatized mind and its conflicts. The proposed dimensions are called the body-other dimension, the subject-group dimension, and the subject-discourse dimension. All three dimensions have specific structural characteristics that are expressed in the analytic relation. Extreme trauma causes disturbances in each of these dimensions. The authors present clinical material from a traumatized refugee to illustrate the analytic work.     

Shame Veiled and Unveiled: The Shame Affect and Its Re-Emergence in the Clinical Setting

The paper examines the psychoanalytic theory of shame and the importance of developmental aspects of the shame affect. In a clinical setting, the discovery of the shame affect, stemming from unconscious and early traumatic situations, is an important and useful approach in helping the patient access painful memories and defenses against them. The defenses disguise the underlying shame affect; furthermore, vision is being bound up with the searing painful affect of shame. The anticipatory dread of scornful gaze of another person, similar to objective self-awareness can cause mortification. Fear of mortification and being exposed emerges in the clinical setting. Through the recognition of enactments in the transference and countertransference interchange, the analyst helps the patient working through them. Several case vignettes demonstrate these important concepts. Finally, the author discusses how shame in certain situations can be a powerful, positive motivator for human interactions.     

Shame and fragmentation in the marital dyad

The paper outlines an expansion of object relations theory to account for fragmentation and shame. This expansion promotes a better psychodynamic perspective on the type of marital conflict escalation that occurs when each spouse turns to the other for empathic receptiveness while that other is also in a disorganized and vulnerable state of mind. Escalation occurs when spouses have different needs for safety and optimum distance and when the shame generated by continued exposure of these needs is not acknowledged. Clinical precepts promoting a focus on fragmentation and acknowledgement of shame are elaborated.     

Counseling Gay Men with AIDS: Human Dimensions

As the incidence of acquired immunodeficiency syndrome (AIDS) becomes more widespread, individuals with AIDS will present themselves for counseling in both public and private settings, and counselors will need to become familiar with the psychological manifestations of the AIDS virus. This article provides case material that demonstrates the emotional responses of gay men to AIDS. Specifically, denial, anger, rage, guilt, and shame are discussed with an emphasis on the human dimensions of AIDS.     

Reclaiming Lost Loves: Transcending Unrequited Desires. Discussion of Davies’ “Oedipal Complexity”

In this discussion I address the multidimensionality embedded within the oedipal phase of development and contend that the elaboration and working through of unrequited oedipal longing within the transference–countertransference matrix is one of the most profound gifts of an analysis. The child’s confrontation with thwarted desire (generationally) for either parent is central to the development of the mind, the personality, and one’s erotic life. I also argue that the experience of oedipal exclusion becomes not solely a response to a generational boundary but to a gender boundary discouraging same-sex love. I speak for retaining a conceptualization of an oedipal complex without losing any of the complexity of individual experience. In describing our oedipal lineages for erotic life as resting upon an interwoven layering of maternal and paternal oedipal desires, my aim is to continue a project to rehabilitate the oedipal concept from heteronormative presumptions and from being (mis)understood in a reductive manner that alienates rather than engages.     

The Colonized Mind: Gender,Trauma, and Mentalization

The question of how gender and trauma may impact one another is explored through detailed clinical material from the author’s work with a patient contemplating, and then beginning, a transition from female to male. The author explores what happens when a mind is colonized rather than mentalized. The term colonize is used to describe the unconscious use of a child’s mind to store unprocessed trauma from an earlier generation. The author describes destabilizing feelings of uncertainty, shame, and anxiety in both patient and analyst at various points in the treatment.     

Internal state of emergency – working with an international student suffering from trauma in a student counselling service

In this paper I look at the suicidal state of mind of an international student who comes from a country at war and has been traumatized by a violent event. The student is tortured by an internal dilemma surrounding unbearable feelings of guilt and shame that arise when she leaves her home country to study abroad. Her dilemma or survivor guilt triggers an internal contract with herself, whereby she is internally persecuted when she makes an attachment to the university and her course. I suggest that an individual in this state of mind, suffering from post-traumatic stress, has regressed to a primary state of unintegration where the self is at the mercy of psychotic anxieties and the student is at risk of suicide. It is suggested that a safety net made up of the student services and the wider health service can provide a symbolic or mental space and containment for the student's state of mind until she can function as a student.