Cognitive processes and conflict in close relationships: an attribution-efficacy model

A recently proposed model of cognitive processes underlying conflict in close relationships (Doherty, 1978, 1981a, 1981b) is revised and tested in two studies. Central to the original model are the causal attributions made for conflict and the perceived efficacy or ability to resolve conflict. The model is revised to incorporate judgments of responsibility and to provide a closer link to self-efficacy theory. The first study examines attributions and efficacy expectations in mother-child relationships. As anticipated, only weak evidence was obtained for predictions retained from the original model, high-lighting the relationship-specific nature of cognitive processes for conflict in families. A second study examines husband-wife relationships and provides evidence for the usefulness of an attribution-efficacy model for marital conflict. The attributional component of the model received greater support than that pertaining to efficacy expectations. In both studies, support was obtained for the proposal that the relation between conflict dimensions (e.g., blame) and causal dimensions is mediated by judgments of responsibility. The significance of the revisions to Doherty's model for understanding conflict in close relationships is discussed, and several avenues for further research are outlined.     

The division of labor in close relationships: An asymmetrical conflict issue

This research addresses couples’reports of their (hypothetical) attempts to maintain or change a gendered division of labor through conflict interactions. Two experiments in which spouses responded to scenarios showed that spouses reported more conflict over the division of housework than conflict over paid work and child care, and that wives more often than husbands desired a change in their spouses’contribution. Spouses reported more wife‐demand/husband‐withdraw than husband‐demand/wife‐withdraw interaction during hypothetical conflict over the division of labor, but only when the wife desired a change in her spouse's contribution. Together, the data imply that wife‐demand/husband‐withdraw interaction is a likely response to the asymmetrically structured conflict situation in which the wife is discontent with her husband's contribution to housework, while her husband wants to maintain the status quo. We further showed that defenders of the status quo were more likely expected to reach their goal than complainants. In the role of complainant, wives were more likely expected to reach their goal than were their husbands, but only when the conflict issue concerned their own gender stereotypical domain (i.e., family work).     

Performance comparisons and attachment: An investigation of competitive responses in close relationships

Two studies investigated whether affective responses to competitive performance situations are moderated by attachment style. In Study 1, participants (n= 115) imagined their reactions to a superior or inferior performance against their romantic partner or an acquaintance. Results showed that participants low in attachment avoidance, relative to those high in avoidance, indicated more positivity after an inferior performance (empathy effect) to their partners, and this finding held only in domains of high importance to the partner. In Study 2, participants (n= 53) imagined comparisons with their partner or a close friend. Low‐avoidance participants, relative to high‐avoidance participants, exhibited sympathy and empathy effects in comparisons involving their romantic partner but not those involving a friend. The findings are discussed in terms of one's model of other and perceived self–other separation, which are defined by avoidance but not anxiety.     

Perceptions of conflict and support in romantic relationships: the role of attachment anxiety

Guided by attachment theory, a 2-part study was conducted to test how perceptions of relationship-based conflict and support are associated with relationship satisfaction/closeness and future quality. Dating partners completed diaries for 14 days (Part 1) and then were videotaped while discussing a major problem that occurred during the diary study (Part 2). Part 1 reveals that more anxiously attached individuals perceived more conflict with their dating partners and reported a tendency for conflicts to escalate in severity. Perceptions of daily relationship-based conflicts negatively impacted the perceived satisfaction/closeness and relationship futures of highly anxious individuals, whereas perceptions of greater daily support had positive effects. Part 2 reveals that highly anxious individuals appeared more distressed and escalated the severity of conflicts (rated by observers) and reported feeling more distressed. The authors discuss the unique features of attachment anxiety and how changing perceptions of relationship satisfaction/closeness and stability could erode commitment over time.     

Attachment representations in adults with congenital blindness: association with maternal interactive behaviors during childhood

This study explores how maternal interactive behaviors experienced during the childhood of adults with congenital blindness are associated with their subsequent development and personality. Many researchers have found a high frequency of maternal directiveness and overprotection in sighted mother-congenitally blind child relationships. One open question is whether these behaviors may have negative effects on congenitally blind children's subsequent development, or whether they may have a functionally adaptive-strategic role. The purpose of this study was to discriminate between the two hypotheses. This objective was pursued by adopting the theory of attachment and administering the Adult Attachment Interview to 15 participants with congenital blindness. Results suggested that directive and overprotective maternal behaviors are experienced by the persons with congenital blindness as encouraging and functional as long as they are accompanied by an affective, loving, and supportive attitude. Results did not support the hypothesis that directive and overprotective maternal interactive behaviors have a necessarily negative effect on the development of persons with congenital blindness.     

Sources of annoyance in close relationships: sex-related differences in annoyance with partner behaviors

The present study is an examination of sex differences in the sources of annoyance that partners in close relationships might experience as a result of each other's behavior. To test hypotheses derived from S. E. Cross and L. Madson's (1997) self-construal theory and from D. M. Buss's (1989) evolutionary psychology-based model, men and women of varying ages and educational levels were asked to rate how annoyed they would be with each of 13 potentially annoying behaviors of their intimate partner. Results were consistent with self-construal theory in that relationship-threatening behaviors were more annoying to women than to men and autonomy threatening behaviors were more annoying to men than to women. Results were also consistent with evolutionary psychology in that aggressive behaviors were more annoying to women than to men and sexual withholding was relatively more annoying to men than to women. Sex differences in annoyance with relationship-threatening, autonomy-threatening, and reproductive strategy behaviors were independent of age and education level, although these factors did affect respondents' annoyance when partners were unemotional, sloppy, or pleased with their own appearance. Results showed that sources of annoyance in intimate relationships should not only be studied from an evolutionary perspective but from the perspectives of social, personality, and developmental psychology as well.     

Impact of attachment style on reactions to accommodative dilemmas in close relationships

Four studies examined reactions to accommodative dilemmas in ongoing close relationships, exploring the association between adult attachment style—secure, avoidant, and anxious-ambivalent—and four possible modes of reaction—exit, voice, loyalty, and neglect. Consistent with predictions, it was shown that which close partners enact potentially destructive behaviors, insecurely attached individuals tend to react in a more defensive and destructive manner. Specifically, in comparison to secure individuals, insecure individuals were more likely to react to accommodative dilemmas with exit and neglect, and were less likely to react with voice. Contrary to predictions, individuals with avoidant and anxious-ambivalent styles did not differ in their reactions to accommodative dilemmas. The implications of these findings for understanding reactions to emotionally threatening interpersonal situations are discussed.     

Exploring the unique and interactive roles of distress tolerance and negative urgency in obsessions

Recent research has implicated relationships between emotion dysregulation and obsessions. Evidence suggests low distress tolerance and greater tendency to act impulsively in the face of negative affect (or negative urgency) are strongly related to obsessions. The current study sought to examine the unique and interactive roles of distress tolerance and negative urgency in the prediction of obsessions. A large non-clinical sample (N = 238) was administered a range of self-report measures. Results revealed that both poor distress tolerance and greater negative urgency were uniquely associated with obsessions but not other obsessive-compulsive symptoms, even when controlling for gender, depression, anxiety, and generalized anxiety disorder symptoms. Additionally, low distress tolerance and high negative urgency interacted with each other in the prediction of greater obsession symptoms. Overall, the findings help clarify the emerging literature linking emotion dysregulation to obsessions.     

The limits of love: Predicting immediate versus sustained caring behaviors in close relationships

Do the same kinds of processes predict spontaneous acts of kindness and long-term caring behavior in relationships? Three studies examined predictors of immediate behaviors versus delayed, sustained behaviors. Positive feelings toward the relationship partner predicted pro-relational behaviors when the behaviors could be completed in an immediate and fairly short timespan, but not when the behaviors required performance after several days delay (Study 1) or when the behavior required continued self-regulation over a period of a week (Studies 2 and 3). Sustained behavior regulation was better predicted by factors related to self-regulation strength, such as trait conscientiousness, than it was by positive relationship feelings. However, when feelings were primed daily, the feelings-behavior link remained strong for sustained behaviors (Study 3). Together, these studies suggest that immediate pro-relational behaviors are more likely to be acts of the heart, whereas delayed, sustained pro-relational behaviors are more likely to be acts of will.     

Remembering the past and imagining the future: attachment effects on production of episodic details in close relationships

Attachment theories and studies have shown that Internal Working Models (IWMs) can impact autobiographical memory and future-oriented information processing relevant to close relationships. According to the constructive episodic simulation hypothesis (CESH), both remembering the past and imagining the future rely on episodic memory. We hypothesised that one way IWMs may bridge past experiences and future adaptations is via episodic memory. The present study investigated the association between attachment and episodic specificity in attachment-relevant and attachment-irrelevant memory and imagination among young and older adults. We measured the attachment style of 37 young adults and 40 older adults, and then asked them to remember or imagine attachment-relevant and attachment-irrelevant events. Participants’ narratives were coded for internal details (i.e., episodic) and external details (e.g., semantic, repetitions). The results showed that across age group, secure individuals generated more internal details and fewer external details in attachment-relevant tasks compared to attachment-irrelevant tasks; these differences were not observed in insecure individuals. These findings support the CESH and provide a new perspective to understand the function of IWMs.     

Mothers' representations of their relationships with their toddlers: links to adult attachment and observed mothering.

Mothers (N = 125) and their firstborn sons were studied over an 11-month period to examine relations between mothers' representations of their relationships with their children (measured at 15 months by using the Parent Development Interview [PDI]), adult representations of attachment (measured at 12 months by using the Adult Attachment Interview [AAI]), and observed mothering (measured at 15 and 21 months). Results indicate (a) that mothers classified as autonomous on the AAI scored highest on the joy-pleasure/coherence dimension of the PDI and mothers classified as dismissing on the AAI scored highest on the anger dimension of the PDI and (b) that mothers scoring higher on the joy-pleasure/coherence dimension of the PDI engaged in less negative and more positive mothering.     

Dyadic synchrony in parent–child interactions: A link with maternal representations of attachment relationships

The study examined the relation between maternal representations of attachment relationships from childhood and current parent–child interactions with their own preschool aged children. Thirty-six mother–child dyads were recruited from a community sample. The Adult Attachment Interview was converted into a questionnaire (AAIQ) and used to classify mothers as either “secure” or “insecure.” The mother–child dyads then engaged in a 20-min, videotaped play interaction task. The quality of maternal representations of attachment relationships was related to the degree of dyadic synchrony, as well as maternal affect and style of relating. Secure mothers and their children engaged in a more fluid, synchronous process of give-and-take than insecure mothers and their children. In addition, secure mothers expressed more warmth and affection, and their style of relating was less intrusive and more encouraging of child autonomy than insecure mothers. Children of secure mothers sought closer contact and were more compliant than children of insecure mothers. These interaction patterns were uniquely related to maternal representations of attachment, independent of maternal age, education and SES. There were no differences in these patterns of relating between mothers who had experienced loving relationships in childhood (continuous secure) and mothers who had come to terms with unloving and painful childhood relationships (earned secure). Therefore, rather than the quality of childhood histories, it was the manner in which these early experiences were mentally organized and integrated in adulthood that was significantly related to current parent–child interaction patterns. Finally, these differences in parent–child interaction patterns that were apparent on the observational measure were in contrast to information obtained from a maternal self-report measure. © 1997 Michigan Association for Infant Mental Health     

Introduction: Internal representations and parent-infant relationships

Infant mental health practitioners have continually striven to understand and to improve disordered parent-infant relationships. Recently, researchers have begun attempts to describe and study these relationships systematically. There is an increasing interest in the construction of internal representations as indices of how relationship patterns are carried internally and transmitted from parent to child. This special issue of the Infant Mental Health Journal presents theoretical and clinical perspectives on internal representations, as well as results from some preliminary empirical investigations. This new convergence of efforts among theoreticians, clinicians, and investigators may yield important advances in our efforts to capture the complexity and riches of parent-infant relationships and their disorders.     

Interparental conflict and children's school adjustment: the explanatory role of children's internal representations of interparental and parent-child relationships

This study examined how children's insecure internal representations of interparental and parent-child relationships served as explanatory mechanisms in multiple pathways linking interparental conflict and parent emotional unavailability with the emotional and classroom engagement difficulties the children had in their adjustment to school. With their parents, 229 kindergarten children (127 girls and 102 boys, mean age = 6.0 years, SD = .50, at Wave 1) participated in this multimethod, 3-year longitudinal investigation. Findings revealed that children's insecure representations of the interparental relationship were a significant intervening mechanism in associations between observational ratings of interparental conflict and child and teacher reports on children's emotional and classroom difficulties in school over a 2-year period. Moreover, increased parental emotional unavailability accompanying high levels of interparental conflict was associated with children's insecure representations of the parent-child relationship and children's difficulties in classroom engagement at school entry. The findings highlight the importance of understanding the intrinsic processes that contribute to difficulties with stage-salient tasks for children who are experiencing interparental discord.     

Self-determination and conflict in romantic relationships

Four studies examined associations between E. L. Deci and R. M. Ryan's (1985, 2000) construct of autonomy, responses to relationship disagreements, and dissatisfaction after conflict. In Study 1, diary data showed that trait autonomy predicted relationship autonomy, which in turn predicted relative satisfaction after disagreements. In Study 2, trait autonomy predicted relationship autonomy, which was associated with less defensive and more understanding responses to conflict. Studies 3 and 4 examined whether one's partner's relationship autonomy uniquely predicted reported and observed behavior during conflict. Autonomous reasons for being in the relationship (of both self and partner) predicted both reported and observed responses to conflict and feelings of satisfaction.     

Push-you-pull-you: the boundaried self in close relationships

Based on Amoebic Self Theory, the authors propose that the salience of different threats to the self affects the extent to which an intimate relationship partner is pushed away (excluded) or pulled closer (included). When social threat is salient among persons in relationships, it is hypothesized that partners will attempt to defuse the resulting sense of interpersonal vulnerability: offending partners may be pushed away, whereas offenders themselves may draw closer. When spatial-symbolic threat is salient and the relationship's capacity to function as an identity marker is jeopardized, it is hypothesized that the partner--regardless of his or her role--will be pulled closer to maintain the perception that the relationship is secure. Self-report responses to hypothetical scenarios and perceptions of behaviors during a role-play were generally consistent with these hypotheses, suggesting that both an intimate partner and the relationship with that partner can be incorporated into the self.     

Understanding in close relationships: An interpersonal approach

Understanding plays a cardinal role in relationships. People desire and need to understand their relationship partners and, importantly, they need to feel understood by others in daily life. In this chapter we suggest that these needs are reflected in people's need to know and be known by others (understanding as knowledge) and their desire to be responsive to others' needs and experience others as responsive to their needs (understanding as responsiveness). We review empirical findings showing that a lack of understanding has important ill-effects and that the presence of understanding has a multitude of beneficial effects for people in relationships, both for their personal and relational well-being.     

Affect and attachment: Kissing,hugging, and patting as attachment behaviors

In this study, the role of affect in attachment was reconsidered, and the relation between kissing, hugging, and patting behavior and attachment in infancy was explored. Ninety-six male infants, aged 2, 4, 7, and 11 months in middle- and lower-class populations in city, kibbutz, Bedouin, and institutional settings, were observed in their natural surroundings for the equivalent of a complete waking day. The affectionate responses first appeared at 7 months. Only in institutions did none of these responses appear at either 7 or 11 months. Most of the affectionate responses were directed to the mother and were emitted in pleasant, relaxed, playful situations. Infants' kissing, hugging, and patting were responded to by the recipient in 60% of the instances by an equivalent response, a vocal response, or by a combination of the two. The implications of these findings for the study of attachment are discussed.     

Trust and partner-enhancing attributions in close relationships

A cross-lagged panel design was used to examine the links between trust and attributional processes in a sample of 75 married couples throughout a period of 2 years. During the first phase of the study, participants completed a measure of marital trust, engaged in a laboratory problem-solving discussion of a recurrent conflict-related issue, and then rated their partner's behavior and motives. Approximately 2 years later, 54 couples were again contacted and measures of trust were obtained. Forty of these couples also viewed a videotape of their laboratory problem-solving discussion from 2 years previously and rated their partner's behavior and motives. Results suggested a reciprocal causal pattern by which partner-enhancing attributions predict changes in trust and trust predicts changes in partner-enhancing attributions.