Stress resilience in early marriage: can practice make perfect?

As all couples experience stressful life events, addressing how couples adapt to stress is imperative for understanding marital development. Drawing from theories of stress inoculation, which suggest that the successful adaptation to moderately stressful events may help individuals develop a resilience to future stress, the current studies examined whether experiences with manageable stressors early in the marriage may serve to make the relationship more resilient to future stress. In Study 1, 61 newlywed couples provided data regarding their stressful life events, relationship resources (i.e., observed problem-solving behaviors), and marital satisfaction at multiple points over 2? years. Results revealed that among spouses displaying more effective problem-solving behaviors, those who experienced moderate stress during the early months of marriage exhibited fewer future stress spillover effects and reported greater increases in felt efficacy than did spouses who had less experience with early stress. Study 2 examined stress resilience following the transition to parenthood in a new sample of 50 newlywed couples. Again, spouses who experienced moderate stress during the early months of marriage and had good initial relationship resources (i.e., observed support behaviors) reported greater marital adjustment following the transition to parenthood than did spouses who had good initial resources but less prior experience coping with stress. Together, results indicate that entering marriage with better relationship resources may not be sufficient to shield marital satisfaction from the detrimental effects of stress; rather, couples may also need practice in using those resources to navigate manageable stressful events.     

Marital Processes Linking Gender Role Attitudes and Marital Satisfaction Among Mexican‐Origin Couples: Application of an Actor–Partner Interdependence Mediation Model

Informed by dyadic approaches and culturally informed, ecological perspectives of marriage, we applied an actor–partner interdependence mediation model (APIMeM) in a sample of 120 Mexican‐origin couples to examine (a) the associations linking Mexican immigrant husbands’ and wives’ gender role attitudes to marital satisfaction directly and indirectly through marital processes (i.e., warmth and negativity) and (b) whether the associations between spouses’ gender role attitudes and marital processes were moderated by wives’ employment. Although previous research has identified spouses’ gender role attitudes as potential predictors of spouses’ marital satisfaction, no study has examined these links in a dyadic model that elucidates how gender role attitudes may operate through processes to shape marital satisfaction and conditions under which associations may differ. We found that when spouses reported less sex‐typed attitudes, their partners reported feeling more connected to them and more satisfied with the marriage, regardless of whether wives were employed. Our results suggest that marital satisfaction was highest for those Mexican‐origin couples in which marital partners were less sex‐typed in their attitudes about marital roles to the extent that partners’ attitudinal role flexibility promoted spouses’ feelings of warmth and connection to their partner.     

Assortative mating,convergence, and satisfaction in married couples

This work investigates assortative mating and convergence in personality and their effect on marital satisfaction. Measures of personality were collected from a sample of married couples before they met and twice after they were married. Results showed evidence for assortative mating but not for convergence in an average couple. Similarity and convergence in personality predicted later marital satisfaction. These results indicate that similarity and convergence in psychological characteristics may benefit relationships and that while spouses may choose partners with similar personalities they do not become more like their partners in the early part of their marriage.     

Understanding marital conflict 7 years later from prenatal representations of marriage

We examine how representations of marriage, assessed prenatally, predict different types of marital conflict (cooperation, avoidance/capitulation, stonewalling, and child involvement in parental conflict) at 7 years postpartum (N=132 individuals). We assessed representations of marriage prenatally by interviewing spouses about their own parents' marriage, and then rated the content and insightfulness of their memories. Results show that marital representations characterized by higher insight predict higher cooperation and lower child involvement in parental conflict, whereas content of marital representations was not a significant predictor of marital conflict. Further, individuals who remember negative memories from their parents' marriage with high insight were lowest on child involvement in parental conflict, whereas those who remember negative memories with low insight were highest on child involvement in parental conflict. Finally, women who remember negative content with high insight report the highest cooperation, whereas women who remember negative content with low insight report the lowest cooperation. For men, however, marital representations were less effective in predicting later cooperation. We conclude that marital representations, even when assessed prenatally, influence certain types of marital conflict 7 years later. Using such findings, therapists could help spouses gain insight into how the memories of their parents' marriage relate to the use of specific conflict strategies in their marriage.     

The role of marital attributions in the relationship between life stressors and marital quality

This study examines the role that marital attributions play in the relationship between the occurrence of stressful life events and marital quality. Using a stress adaptation theory framework, data from 58 couples were used to test for the presence of a moderating relationship. The results supported the moderational model, indicating that the marital quality of couples who make relationship‐enhancing attributions about their spouses’ negative behaviors is less related to stress than those who make distress‐maintaining attributions. Couples’ successful adaptation to stress may be dependent on their ability to use their marital attributions as a coping resource. While the types of marital attributions a couple makes have the potential to make their marriage more vulnerable to the effects of stress, they also have the potential to serve a protective role.     

The origins of modern divorce

High rates of marital dissolution and easy access to divorce are not unprecedented, historically or cross-culturally. But contemporary divorce in North America and Western Europe has different origins and features than divorce in previous cultures. The origins of modern divorce patterns date back more than 200 years, to the invention of the historically unprecedented idea that marriage should be based on love and mutual affection. Ironically, then, the fragility of modern marriage stems from the same values that have elevated the marital relationship above all other personal and familial commitments: the concentration of emotion, passion, personal identity, and self-validation in the couple relationship and the attenuation of emotional attachments and obligations beyond the conjugal unit. The immediate causes of divorce may range from factors as diverse as the personal psychological characteristics of one or both spouses to the stresses of economic hardship and community disintegration. But in a larger perspective, the role of divorce in modern societies and its relatively high occurrence both flow from the same complex of factors that have made good marriages so much more central to people's happiness than through most of the past, and deterioration of a marital relationship so much more traumatic.     

Paths and Pitfalls

SUMMARY

In up to two million couples ever married, one spouse has disclosed or may disclose being gay, lesbian, or bisexual. An increasing number of spouses are coming out, yet the phenomenon remains little known. Disclosing spouses generally find supporting organizations, while their heterosexual spouses find little support or understanding of their issues. Isolated, most cope alone. Dealing with sexual rejection, the challenge to the marriage, and, if they have children, spouse/parent conflicts is followed by handling questions about their own identity, integrity, and belief system. This piece describes issues that heterosexual spouses typically face and stages through which they move from survival to reconfiguring their lives whether or not they stay married. Peer support helps this process that lasts several years or more. Knowledge about spouse's concerns assists therapists working with spouses to help them resolve potentially paralyzing pain, anger, grief, or fear.     

Attributions in marriage: review and critique

The prevailing behavioral account of marriage must be expanded to include covert processes. This article therefore examines the attributions or explanations that spouses make for marital events. A review indicates that dissatisfied spouses, compared with satisfied spouses, make attributions for the partner's behavior that cast it in a negative light. Experimental, clinical outcome, and longitudinal data suggest further that attributions may influence marital satisfaction. Rival hypotheses for these findings are examined. Because continued empirical development in this domain depends on conceptual progress, a framework is presented that integrates attributions, behavior, and marital satisfaction. This framework points to several topics that require systematic study, and specific hypotheses are offered for research on these topics. It is concluded that the promising start made toward understanding marital attributions holds considerable potential for enriching behavioral conceptions of marriage.     

Epigenetic Model of Marital Expectations

The Epigenetic model of understanding marital expectations of Bhatti focuses on the domains of (a) expectations from the partner, (b) expectations from marriage, (c) expectations of and from the partner’s family of origin, (d) expectations of the institution of marriage, and (e) the concept of an “ideal partner,” and helps in understanding how martial expectations are influenced by various factors in the person’s life. The underlying assumption is that the spouses enter the marriage with expectations (on all the above mentioned domains), which are facts and exist at a conscious level in the social reality. These indicators further evolve, refine, and change across the span of the marriage. This model has formed the framework for marital therapy and other interventions. This paper highlights the application of this model in marital therapy with couples with marital dysfunction.     

The relationship between marital standards,dyadic coping and marital satisfaction

Different types of cognitions in close relationships have been identified. Yet, little is known about the nature and effects of most of them, such as marital standards. In our research project ‘What makes marriages last?’ we applied a German adaptation of the ‘Inventory of Specific Relationship Standards,’ a questionnaire measuring how much sharing, egalitarianism and investment spouses feel they should have and actually experience in their own marriage. We hypothesized that high, i.e., relationship‐focused standards, should be associated with dyadic coping processes as well as with marital satisfaction. Thereby, dyadic coping was expected to play a mediating role between standards and marital satisfaction. Based on a sample of 663 German married couples, we found significant correlations between standards, marital satisfaction, and dyadic coping processes. Moreover, supportive behavior in stressful situations had the expected partial mediating effect, which turned out to be slightly different for husbands and wives. Implications for preventive and therapeutic intervention are discussed. Copyright © 2006 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.     

Perceived Criticism and Marital Adjustment Predict Depressive Symptoms in a Community Sample

Depressive symptoms are related to a host of negative individual and family outcomes; therefore, it is important to establish risk factors for depressive symptoms to design prevention efforts. Following studies in the marital and psychiatric literatures regarding marital factors associated with depression, we tested two potential predictors of depressive symptoms: marital adjustment and perceived spousal criticism. We assessed 249 spouses from 132 married couples from the community during their first year of marriage and at three time points over the next 10 years. Initial marital adjustment significantly predicted depressive symptoms for husbands and wives at all follow-ups. Further, perceived criticism significantly predicted depressive symptoms at the 5- and 10-year follow-ups. However, at the 1-year follow-up, this association was significant for men but not for women. Finally, a model where the contributions of marital adjustment and perceived criticism were tested together suggested that both play independent roles in predicting future depressive symptoms. These findings highlight the potential importance of increasing marital adjustment and reducing perceived criticism at the outset of marriage as a way to reduce depressive symptoms during the course of marriage.     

How does context affect intimate relationships? linking external stress and cognitive processes within marriage

Stressors external to the marriage frequently affect the way spouses evaluate their marital quality. To date, however, understanding of the interplay between external stress and internal relationship processes has been limited in two ways. First, research has generally examined only the short-term consequences of stress. Second, the mechanisms through which external stressors influence relationship outcomes are unclear. This study addressed both limitations by examining relationship cognitions that may mediate the effects of external stress throughout 4 years of marriage. Analyses confirmed that stressful experiences were associated with the trajectory of marital quality overtime. Furthermore, both the content and the organization of spouses' specific relationship cognitions mediated this effect. That is, stress negatively influenced the nature of spouses' marital perceptions as well as the way spouses interpreted and processed those perceptions. These findings draw attention to ways that the context of relationships shapes and constrains relationship processes.     

Psychological symptoms and marital satisfaction in spouses of Operation Iraqi Freedom veterans: relationships with spouses' perceptions of veterans' experiences and symptoms

Much research has shown that spouses of combat veterans with posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD) have higher rates of psychological and marital distress than do spouses of veterans without PTSD; however, very few studies have examined potential mechanisms of this increased vulnerability. The current study examined spouses of National Guard soldiers recently returned from deployments in Iraq. In addition to documenting elevated levels of psychological symptoms in these spouses, the authors found that spouses experienced greater symptom severity when they perceived high levels of symptoms in soldiers but the soldiers endorsed low levels of symptoms. Furthermore, spouses' marital satisfaction was negatively linked to soldiers' self-reported symptom severity only when spouses perceived that soldiers had experienced low levels of combat activity while deployed. When spouses perceived high levels of such activity, soldiers' self-reported symptoms had no relationship with spouses' marital satisfaction. These findings highlight the importance of interpersonal perceptions in intimate relationships and are consistent with the notion that uncontrollable attributions for a relative's mental health problems may provide a buffer against relationship distress. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2008 APA, all rights reserved).     

Marriage at the Summit: Response to the Commentaries

This article serves as a response to the 13 commentaries on the target article, which introduced the suffocation model of marriage in America. This reply has four main sections. First, it presents an elaborated version of the suffocation model that was inspired by the commentaries. Second, it addresses three areas of significant disagreement that emerged as we digested the commentaries. Third, it examines the circumstances under which being instrumental for one's spouse's needs benefits the self. And fourth, it takes strides toward the development of a mathematically formal version of the suffocation model. It concludes with a discussion of the ways in which policymakers, clinicians, and individual Americans can capitalize upon the suffocation model to strengthen marriage and, in doing so, bolster personal well-being.     

Environmental threat influences psychological distress and marital satisfaction among avoidantly attached individuals

This research examined the impact of stressful environments on marital relationships. In all, 133 Israeli couples exposed to different levels of terror threat and political uncertainty completed measures of attachment orientation, psychological distress, and marital satisfaction. Results indicated that in low‐threat areas, spouses high on attachment avoidance did not express distress despite their marital dissatisfaction. In contrast, in high‐threat areas, spouses high on attachment avoidance exhibited greater psychological distress, and psychological distress mediated the relation between attachment avoidance and marital dissatisfaction. Psychological distress only partially mediated the relation between attachment anxiety and marital dissatisfaction in the entire sample. The discussion stresses the importance of considering attachment dimensions when studying the effects of external stressors on marital relations.     

Care For Pastors: Learning From Clergy and Their Spouses

Pastors and their spouses face unique challenges because of the nature of pastoral work, and yet most manage these challenges successfully. Five studies are presented which help distinguish between intrapersonal, family, and community forms of care. Pastors rely heavily on intrapersonal forms of coping such as spiritual devotion, hobbies, exercise, and taking time away from work. The marriage relationship is also quite important for most clergy and spouses. Relationships outside the immediate family are not commonly identified as coping resources. Implications are discussed.     

“Why didn’t you just ask?” Underestimating the discomfort of help-seeking

Across four studies we demonstrate that people in a position to provide help tend to underestimate the role that embarrassment plays in decisions about whether or not to ask for help. As a result, potential helpers may overestimate the likelihood that people will ask for help (Studies 1 and 2). Further, helpers may be less inclined to allocate resources to underutilized support programs than help-seekers because they are less likely to attribute low levels of use to help-seekers’ concerns with embarrassment (Study 3). Finally, helpers may misjudge the most effective means of encouraging help-seeking behavior - emphasizing the practical benefits of asking for help, rather than attempting to assuage help-seekers’ feelings of discomfort (Study 4).     

Relational aggression in marriage

Drawing from developmental theories of relational aggression, this article reports on a study designed to identify if spouses use relationally aggressive tactics when dealing with conflict in their marriage and the association of these behaviors with marital outcomes. Using a sample of 336 married couples (672 spouses), results revealed that the majority of couples reported that relationally aggressive behaviors, such as social sabotage and love withdrawal, were a part of their marital dynamics, at least to some degree. Gender comparisons of partner reports of their spouse's behavior revealed that wives were significantly more likely to be relationally aggressive than husbands. Structural equation modeling demonstrated that relational aggression is associated with lower levels of marital quality and greater marital instability for both husbands and wives. Implications are drawn for the use of relational aggression theory in the future study of couple conflict and marital aggression Aggr. Behav. 36:315–329, 2010. © 2010 Wiley‐Liss, Inc.     

Who's Got the Power? Gender Differences in Partners’ Perceptions of Influence During Marital Problem-Solving Discussions

Previous research on marital communication indicates that women have more influence in marital problem solving because they raise the issues and shape the discussion. Other studies suggest that men have the power in marital problem solving. This study re-examines power and influence from the partners’ point of view. Twenty-seven couples — 18 with a first child under 2, and 9 undecided about having children — were videotaped while working on a self-selected problem concerning their division of family labor. Data sources included: (a) transcribed audiotaped accounts given by each partner while viewing a videotape of their problem-solving discussion; (b) self-report questionnaires; and (c) ratings by a research team of the concordance between spouses’ accounts. Husbands and wives were perceived as having a primary influence on different aspects of the discussion. Women tended to raise the issues and draw men out in the early phase of the discussion, while men controlled the content and emotional depth of the later discussion phases, and largely determined the outcome. The women's accounts emphasized that their influence in the early phase was often illusory: their behavior was shaped primarily by the effort to choose strategies that would avoid upsetting their husbands. In terms of overall satisfaction with marriage, wives had greater tolerance than their husbands for conflict in the area of division of domestic labor, but less tolerance for their husbands’ domination of the discussion process. Women's marital satisfaction was higher when there was concordance between spouses in their accounts of their problem-solving discussion. This research highlights the importance of eliciting spouses’ own perceptions and definitions in understanding the impact of gender-linked power differences in marital communication.