Gender and social structure in the demand/withdraw pattern of marital conflict

This study examined the effects of gender and social structure on the demand/withdraw pattern of marital conflict. In this pattern, the demander, usually the woman, pressures the other through emotional requests, criticism, and complaints, and the withdrawer, usually the man, retreats through defensiveness and passive inaction. In this study, 31 couples were assessed in 2 conflict situations: 1 in which husband wanted a change in wife and 1 in which wife wanted a change in husband. Data from husbands, wives, and observers consistently revealed a significant main effect of gender (wife-demand/husband-withdraw interaction was more likely than husband-demand/wife-withdraw interaction) and a significant interaction of gender and conflict structure (wife-demand/husband-withdraw interaction was more likely than the reverse only when discussing a change the wife wanted). Separate analyses of demand and withdraw behaviors indicated that both husband and wife were more likely to be demanding when discussing a change they wanted and more likely to be withdrawing when discussing a change their partner wanted. However, men were overall more withdrawn than women, but women were not overall more demanding than men.     

Saving the best for last: how adults treat social partners of different ages

Older adults report more positive feelings and fewer problems in their relationships than do younger adults. These positive experiences may partially reflect how people treat older adults. Social partners may treat older adults more kindly due to their sense that time remaining to interact with these older adults is limited. Younger (n = 87, age 22 to 35) and older (n = 89, age 65 to 77) participants indicated how positively they would behave (i.e., express affection, proffer respect, send sentimental cards) and what types of conflict strategies they would use in response to hypothetical negative interactions with two close social partners, a younger adult and an older adult. Multilevel models revealed that participants were more avoidant and less confrontational when interacting with older adults than when interacting with younger adults. Time perspective of the relationship partially mediated these age differences. Younger and older participants were also more likely to select sentimental cards for older partners than for younger partners. Findings build on socioemotional selectivity theory and the social input model to suggest that social partners facilitate better relationships in late life.     

Age differences in social preferences among Taiwanese and Mainland Chinese: the role of perceived time

Socioemotional selectivity theory holds that as people recognize the inevitable constraint of time imposed by mortality, their social goals change, motivating them to limit social contacts to those with whom they are emotionally close. This theory was tested among Taiwanese and Mainland Chinese. As predicted, results showed that older adults (aged 60-90 years) in both cultures were more likely than younger adults (aged 18-30 years) to prefer familiar social partners who were most likely to provide emotionally close social interactions. Mainland Chinese, who as a group have shorter actuarial life expectancy, were more likely to prefer familiar social partners than were Taiwanese. These age and cultural differences were eliminated when differences in perceived time were statistically controlled for.     

The role of symmetrical and asymmetrical social conflict in cognitive change

We asked whether dyads consisting of nonconservers of liquid would be more likely than solo controls to change to a conservation answer when each child gave symmetrically conflicting answers from different perspectives ("more" versus "less" from different viewpoints). We also asked whether nonconservers are more likely than conservers to abandon their answers in conserver + nonconserver dyads. In order to stimulate the perspectival conflicts in the nonconserver + nonconserver dyads, the partners experienced artificial displays in which the two possible answers were afforded by different views of the apparatus. We found no evidence that social conflict of the kind engineered in the nonconserver + nonconserver dyads stimulates cognitive change. Our evidence that nonconservers tend to adopt the conservation answer of their partners was less strong than that collected in previous studies, but this may have been due to the fact that, contrary to previous studies, the children's social dominance relations were affecting the outcome. We concluded that the ineffectiveness of symmetrical social conflict is consistent with Piaget's conception of nonconservers as children insensitive to the perspective-relative nature of their judgments.     

Why Expecting Conflict Is Good

To understand whether young women's expectations of marriage-career role conflict may lead to strategic plans for combining roles and more successful role combination, data were analyzed from 117 women, primarily Caucasian, completing surveys in the Women's Life Paths Study in 1967 as college seniors and again in 1981. Seniors who wanted careers but anticipated conflict more often combined marriage and full-time career in 1981 than did those who wanted careers but expected no conflict. The latter combined marriage and career even less often than did those not initially wanting careers. Those who expected conflict asserted their career intentions with spouses, postponed childbearing, and had fewer children by 1981. Women not combining roles in 1981 most often reported conflict. Women with supportive partners less often reported conflict.     

Relationship work among young adult couples: Romantic,social, and physiological considerations

We examined romantic, social, and physiological variables associated with partners discussing romantic challenges together and with friends, a process known as relationship work (RW). Actor‐partner interdependence models examining 71 heterosexual, young adult couples and their friends suggested social network approval, friendship quality, and partners' perspective taking were each associated with partners' RW patterns. Skin conductance activity readings revealed males universally experienced greater physiological arousal when discussing romantic problems than females. Unexpectedly, both males and females experienced greater skin conductance activity when discussing romantic challenges with friends than with partners. Males were more likely to discuss romantic challenges with friends when their female partners experienced greater baseline skin conductance activity. Findings inform researchers regarding links between romantic, social, and physiological functioning.     

Repeating the Errors of Our Parents? Family‐of‐Origin Spouse Violence and Observed Conflict Management in Engaged Couples*

Based on a developmental social learning analysis, it was hypothesized that observing parental violence predisposes partners to difficulties in managing couple conflict. Seventy-one engaged couples were assessed on their observation of parental violence in their family of origin. All couples were videotaped discussing two areas of current relationship conflict, and their cognitions during the interactions were assessed using a video-mediated recall procedure. Couples in which the male partner reported observing parental violence (male-exposed couples) showed more negative affect and communication during conflict discussions than couples in which neither partner reported observing parental violence (unexposed couples). Couples in which only the female partner reported observing parental violence (female-exposed couples) did not differ from unexposed couples in their affect or behavior. Female-exposed couples reported more negative cognitions than unexposed couples, but male-exposed couples did not differ from unexposed couples in their reported cognitions.     

Seeking security or growth: a regulatory focus perspective on motivations in romantic relationships

Using a multimethod approach, we examined how regulatory focus shapes people's perceptual, behavioral, and emotional responses in different situations in romantic relationships. We first examined how chronic regulatory focus affects romantic partners' support perceptions and problem-solving behaviors while they were engaged in a conflict resolution discussion (Study 1). Next, we experimentally manipulated regulatory focus and tested its effects on partner perceptions when individuals recalled a prior conflict resolution discussion (Study 2). We then examined how chronic regulatory focus influences individuals' emotional responses to hypothetical relationship events (Study 3) and identified specific partner behaviors to which people should respond with regulatory goal-congruent emotions (Study 4). Strongly prevention-focused people perceived their partners as more distancing and less supportive during conflict (Studies 1 and 2), approached conflict resolution by discussing the details related to the conflict (Study 1), and experienced a negative relationship outcome with more agitation (Study 3). Strongly promotion-focused people perceived their partners as more supportive and less distancing (Studies 1 and 2), displayed more creative conflict resolution behavior (Study 1), and experienced a negative relationship outcome with more sadness and a favorable outcome with more positive emotions (Study 3). In Study 4, recalling irresponsible and responsible partner behaviors was associated with experiencing more prevention-focused emotions, whereas recalling affectionate and neglectful partner behaviors was associated with more promotion-focused emotions. The findings show that regulatory focus and approach-avoidance motivations influence certain interpersonal processes in similar ways, but regulatory focus theory also generates novel predictions on which approach-avoidance models are silent.     

Strategies of influence in close relationships

In this study, we examined how close relationship partners spontaneously influence each other while they discussed an existing problem in their relationship. According to theories of social influence, people in important, self-defining relationships should experience the relationship itself as a potent source of influence. Thus, they are likely to rely on the relationship as a source of power and to use influence strategies that reference relationship norms and values. Consistent with this reasoning, dating partners who were subjectively closer to their partners/relationships were more likely to reference the relationship in their influence attempts than those who were less subjectively close. Furthermore, referencing the relationship was an effective influence strategy. Greater referencing was associated with opinion shifts during discussions for both agents and targets of influence, with each compromising toward the other's position. In contrast, greater use of negative coercion as an influence strategy (e.g., derogation of the partner or punishment) was associated with less compromise.     

Emotion regulation strategy selection in daily life: The role of social context and goals

Recent studies have begun to document the diversity of ways people regulate their emotions. However, one unanswered question is why people regulate their emotions as they do in everyday life. In the present research, we examined how social context and goals influence strategy selection in daily high points and low points. As expected, suppression was particularly tied to social features of context: it was used more when others were present, especially non-close partners, and when people had instrumental goals, especially more interpersonal ones (e.g., avoid conflict). Distraction and reappraisal were used more when regulating for hedonic reasons (e.g., to feel better), but these strategies were also linked to certain instrumental goals (e.g., getting work done). When contra-hedonic regulation occurred, it primarily took the form of dampening positive emotion during high points. Suppression was more likely to be used for contra-hedonic regulation, whereas reappraisal and distraction were used more for pro-hedonic regulation. Overall, these findings highlight the social nature of emotion regulation and underscore the importance of examining regulation in both positive and negative contexts.     

The costs and benefits of sexism: resistance to influence during relationship conflict

This study tested whether men's and women's hostile sexism (HS) and benevolent sexism (BS) were associated with resistance to influence in couples' conflict interactions. Ninety-one heterosexual couples were recorded while trying to produce desired changes in each other. Participants reviewed their discussions and rated how open they were to their partner's perspective. Objective coders also rated the extent to which each partner exhibited hostile communication. We tested key principles arising from ambivalent sexism theory (Glick & Fiske, 1996). First, BS is necessary because mutual interdependence reduces the power of HS to influence women within intimate relationships. We found that the more men endorsed HS, the less open and more hostile both partners were, and the less successful their discussions were in producing desired change. Second, BS reduces the threat of women's dyadic power by revering and respecting women's interpersonal roles while restricting women's influence outside the relationship domain. We found that men who expressed higher agreement with BS were more open to their partners' influence and behaved with less hostility, and their discussions were more successful. These relationship benefits illustrate why BS is effective at disarming women's resistance to wider inequalities. These benefits, however, were contingent on men adopting BS attitudes. When women strongly endorsed BS but their male partner did not, women were less open, behaved with greater hostility, and perceived their discussions as less successful. These results indicate that, because BS increases the stakes within the relationship domain, women who endorse BS will react more negatively when their expectations are not realized.     

Gender differences in conflict resolution styles of managers: At work and at home

Because women and men managers occupy different roles at work and at home, role theory suggests that they would use different conflict resolution behaviors in each role. This study tested this theory empirically using the Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode instrument to measure the five conflict resolution styles of 201 managers (99 males and 102 females) in both situational roles. Sex differences were examined along with hierarchical rank. Both genders tended to handle conflict more competitively at work than at home, and used the accommodating style more frequently at home than at work. At home, low-level women managers were more willing to collaborate and less willing to avoid conflict than at work; men managers overall were less likely to compromise at home than at work.     

Creating Mr. Right and Ms. Right: Interpersonal ideals and personal change in newlyweds

Based on research on exchanging information during conflict (e.g., Levinger, 1983) and the energizing effects of negative feelings (e.g., Lewin, 1951; Gottman & Krokoff, 1989), this study explores circumstances in which individuals change, over the years, in fulfillment of their spouses’unmet ideals for them. In a longitudinal study of over 200 African American newlywed couples and White newlywed couples, respondents’ratings were combined to form an index of individuals’change in fulfillment of their partners’initially unmet ideals for them. Predictions were that individuals would change more when they listen and try to understand their partners’feelings during conflict or when they have negative feelings about the functioning of the relationship. Results were that high openness to information exchange during conflict predicted high change for White husbands, White wives, and African American wives, and negative feelings about relationship functioning predicted high change for White wives, African American wives, and African American husbands.     

Causal chunking: memory and inference in ongoing interaction

We propose that people simplify their perceptions of their interactions by organizing them into discrete casual chunks. Once formed, these chunks presumably influence the extent to which people are aware of their influence on others, as well as their impressions of others. We anticipated that people would form self-causal chunks (e.g., my action causes my partner's action) when they possessed an offensive set and other-causal chunks when they possessed a defensive set. We also expected that a self-causal chunking strategy would make salient people's influence on their partners and thereby discourage them from concluding that their partner's behaviors reflected underlying dispositions. In contrast, we anticipated that an other-causal chunking strategy would obscure people's influence on their partners, thereby encouraging them to infer that their partners' behaviors reflected underlying dispositions. We tested these hypotheses by inducing participants to develop either a defensive or an offensive set prior to interacting with another person in a simulated arms race. After the interactions, we assessed the manner in which participants chunked their interactions, as well as their impressions of partners. The results supported our predictions. The implications of these findings for understanding conflict and misunderstanding in interpersonal relations are discussed.     

Self-verification processes: How we sustain our self-conceptions

It is proposed here that individuals use their social interactions as opportunities to verify and confirm their self-conceptions. In a series of empirical investigations, three unique strategies of self-verification are examined. In Investigation I, participants were more likely to seek social feedback when they believed that it would confirm their self-conceptions. In Investigation II, participants elicited reactions from their interaction partners that confirmed their self-conceptions, especially when they suspected that their interaction partners' appraisals might disconfirm their self-conceptions. In Investigation III, participants preferentially recalled social feedback that confirmed their self-conceptions. Thus, within each of three distinct phases of the social interaction, people sought to verify their self-conceptions. The interplay of different strategies of self-verification and the conditions under which they will occur are discussed.     

冲突与支持影响情侣依恋的文化差异

采用香港和美国的被试,运用亲密关系经历量表、冲突量表和社会支持量表,考察了冲突和支持对于情侣依恋影响的文化差异。结果发现,当以依恋焦虑为因变量时,冲突、支持和文化 × 冲突 × 支持都是显著的预测变量;当以依恋逃避为因变量时,仅文化和文化 × 支持是显著的预测变量。由此可见,文化影响冲突 × 支持与依恋焦虑的关系：在香港,情侣之间的冲突和支持各自对于依恋焦虑的作用在很大程度上相互抵消;在美国,情侣之间冲突的负面影响比支持的积极影响要强,冲突 × 支持越高,依恋焦虑越高。对于依恋逃避,文化差异仅调节支持与依恋逃避的关系：在香港,支持对依恋逃避的影响要比美国强。整个研究表明,对不同类型的情侣依恋,文化的调节作用不同。     

The psychophysiology of adult attachment relationships: Autonomic reactivity in marital and premarital interactions

To better understand the origins of autonomic reactivity during marital interactions, this study examined the psychophysiological profiles of prototypically secure (vs. insecure) and deactivating (vs. hyperactivating) adults while they talked about areas of disagreement with their (pre)marital partners. Adults who idealized their caregivers and/or normalized harsh childhood experiences during the Adult Attachment Interview (i.e., deactivating adults) manifested heightened electrodermal reactivity, a sign of emotional inhibition, while attempting to resolve conflict in their relationships, whereas individuals who became angrily or passively caught up while discussing their early lives (i.e., hyperactivating adults) later showed increases in heart rate while conversing with their partners, suggesting behavioral activation. In contrast, security was associated with low levels of electrodermal change from baseline in the context of this normatively mild marital stressor. Results were generally consistent for 40 younger engaged and 40 mature married couples.     

Adult attachment and emotional control

The connection between attachment style and affect regulation, proposed by attachment theorists, was explored in the context of long-term dating relationships. Seventy-two couples completed questionnaire measures of attachment (using a four-group forced-choice item, together with scales tapping Comfort with closeness, and Anxiety over relationships) and emotional control (in which subjects rated own and partner's control of anger, sadness, and anxiety, and the extent to which partners wanted them to control these emotions). Couples in which both partners endorsed insecure attachment styles (using the forced-choice measure) reported greater emotional control than did couples with two secure partners. Data from the attachment scales also supported the link between insecure attachment and emotional control: Comfort with closeness was negatively related both to one's own emotional control and to perceptions that partners wanted subjects to control their sadness; Anxiety over relationships was associated with perceptions that partners controlled sadness and wanted subjects to control their anger and sadness. The link between insecure attachment and the control of negative emotion remained significant when the frequency of experiencing such emotion was controlled. The association between attachment dimensions and other responses to negative emotions was also explored, and was consistent with attachment theory.     

Multiple Goals and Tactical Behaviors in Social Conflicts1

The hypotheses of a multiple goals theory of conflict were supported in a study in which 264 American students reported on a conflict that they had experienced. The results showed that 95% of subjects had more than 1 goal during the conflict; social goals were more strongly activated than resource goals; subjects' tactical behavior was determined by the social goals; and effects of personal and situational variables on tactical choice were mediated by activated goals. Factor analyses identified 6 goals and 4 types of tactics.     

Body image and exercise: A study of relationships and comparisons between physically active men and women

A group of physically active women (n=112) and men (n=88) of a broad range of ages were compared on a number of variables related to body image, weight and diet concerns, and degree of exercise participation. Interrelationships between these measures were also examined. Results indicated that men and women were equally dissatisfied with their current weight. Although most women wanted to lose weight, the men were evenly divided between those who wanted to lose and those who wanted to gain. Women, however, were more dissatisfied with their bodies and placed greater importance on their appearance as an influence on their feelings of well-being. Although there were no sex differences in degree of physical activity, women were more likely than men to exercise to try and lose weight. Of interest was the finding that age was not related to body focus or body dissatisfaction for either sex. For women and older men, the degree to which they exercised was not associated with any of the body image variables. A very different pattern of relationships was found for young men. Greater body satisfaction was associated with increases in exercise participation and with increased body focus, a variable that was also associated with increased levels of exercise. The profile of results is considered in the context of social influences such as health promotion and sex roles — factors that have likely affected current attitudes to physical appearance and physical attractiveness among both sexes.