Facilitating forgiveness in the treatment of infidelity: an interpersonal model

This article presents a unique clinical model of forgiveness developed specifically for use in the treatment of infidelity. The model focuses on forgiveness as a central component of the process of healing for couples who desire relationship reconciliation following an affair. Infidelity causes significant damage for couples and results in a loss of trust and relationship stability. However, couples can become reunified and trust may be restored as couples work through the process of forgiveness. Forgiveness is facilitated as therapists and clients focus on four unifying factors: empathy, humility, commitment and apology. Specific steps are outlined for therapists to help them guide clients through the process of forgiveness. The clinical application of the model is illustrated with a brief case example.     

What, why, and for whom: couples interventions: a deconstruction approach

This paper provides a commentary on the special series on universal processes and common factors in couple therapy (Halford & Snyder, this issue). The authors in this section share their insights, from varying perspectives, about what it is in couples therapy and relationship education programs that work, why they work, and for whom they work best. In so doing, these articles address specific elements of couples interventions--in effect, taking a couples approach apart in order to understand it better. However, as a collection, this section takes this approach to understanding one step further. It puts the elements back together again, making the process of couples therapy/relationship education more accessible and easier to customize based upon the couple, the presenting complaints, the therapist, and the context. The term "deconstruction" is used to describe how the specific elements of couples interventions are understood and reassembled in new, theoretical, and empirically validated ways. It is argued here that once it is understood that a couples intervention works, why it works, and for whom it works, we are able to individualize our approach to specific couples in an effort to make couples therapy better at improving relationships and keeping them improved.     

The Divine Triangle: God in the Marital System of Religious Couples

Incoporating both Bowenian and structural approaches, this article offers a constructivist view for dealing with religious belief systems of couples. After exploring the evolving process by which couples mutually define an ongoing triadic relationship with their Deity, different triangular processes from an integrated structural and Bowenian perspective are presented. This view is evaluative in terms of the triangulation process rather than the belief systems themselves, and, as such, it can be useful in marital therapy regardless of the religious beliefs of the therapist. Implications for marital therapy are examined.     

Structured Separation with Counseling: A Therapeutic Approach for Couples in Conflict

A three-month trial separation with counseling is suggested as a form of crisis intervention for couples in conflict. The purpose of the counseling is to help the marital partners understand their relationship, resolve their conflicts, decide whether their future relationship will be together or apart, and grow through the separation process. A one-year follow-up was conducted with eighteen couples who completed structured separation with counseling.     

A Comparison of the Effects of Negative Communication and Spirituality on Relationship Quality Among Different Latino and Anglo Couple Groups

This study explored how negative communication and spirituality influence relationship quality across four couple groups. Data was gathered from Anglo couples, interethnic Latino and Anglo couples, and Latino couples. Data was analyzed in a mediating Actor–Partner Interaction Model (APIM) with a multiple group analysis. Negative communication was negatively associated with relationship quality uniformly. Generally, male spirituality positively influenced his own relationship quality and was positively associated with female relationship quality in one group. Female spirituality was negatively associated with relationship quality for both genders in that same group and her spirituality partially mediated that process. Clinical implications are discussed.     

“We Hardly Ever Talk about It”: Emotional Responsive Attunement in Couples after a Child's Death

Within Western cultural traditions, the idea that parents should talk about the death of their child with each other is deeply rooted. However, across bereaved parent couples there are wide variations in communication about their grief with each other. In this study, we explored the experiences of bereaved couples related to the process of talking and not talking. We used a thematic coding approach to analyze 20 interviews with 26 bereaved parents (11 interviewed as couples, four as individuals). Four main meanings emerged out of our analysis: not talking because of the inadequacy and pointlessness of words in grief, not talking as a way to regulate emotions in daily life, not talking as an expression of a personal, intimate process, and not talking because the partner has the same loss but a different grief process. In addition, we found that the process of talking and not talking can partly be understood as an emotional responsive process on an intrapersonal and interpersonal level. In this process partners search for a bearable distance from their own grief and their partner's, and attune with their relational context. A better understanding of this process is sought in a dialectical approach, emphasizing the value of both talking and not talking in a tense relationship with each other. Implications for clinical work are described.     

The deterioration of relationship quality for gay and lesbian cohabiting couples: A five-year prospective longitudinal study

Data are reported from both partners of 60 gay and 46 lesbian couples, a subset of whom annually completed mailed surveys over a S-year period. At Year I, relationship quality was found to be comprised of three factors: positivity, relationship conflict, and personal autonomy. Compared to stable couples, couples who eventually separated reported a decrease in positivity, an increase in relationship conflict, and an increase in personal autonomy in the preseparation period. When the three dimensions of change in relationship quality were considered together, relationship dissolution was predicted by an interaction between change in positivity and change id personal autonomy such that decreases in positivity were linked to dissolution, especially when personal autonomy increased. Year 1 personal risk factors (inexpressiveness, dysfunctional relationship beliefs, and social anxiety) were unsuccessful in predicting relationship dissolution and linear change in either positivity or personal autonomy. Findings were not moderated by type of couple. It is concluded that change is a core relationship process.     

Relationship Patterns and Role of Religion in Elderly Couples with Chronic Illness

ABSTRACT

This study was designed to explore the various relationship patterns and the role religion plays as a coping resource for elderly couples in which at least one spouse has a chronic illness. Elderly couples were interviewed and also completed marital satisfaction and couple communication inventories. Five different relationship patterns emerged from the data: active couples, short-term caregivinjg couples, long-term caregiving couples, survival couples, and live-in caregiver couples. Various aspects of religion emerged as an important coping resource among the different relationship patterns. Ideas and questions for research and practice, generated by the study, are presented.     

Client discourses on the process of seeking same-sex couple counselling

How same-sex couples manage the process of seeking help for their relationships is an under-researched area. Twelve semi-structured interviews were conducted with 16 people who had engaged in same-sex couple counselling, and were analysed using discourse analysis. The ways in which the couples positioned themselves as part of a ‘minority group’, or part of a generic group of couples struggling with relationship issues, impacted on how they discussed seeking help. We conclude that counsellors and psychotherapists need to be aware of the ways in which couples construct their relationships, and mindful of the tricky navigations around similarity to, and difference from, different-sex relationships. The impact of this on couples seeking therapeutic help is considered.     

Destiny or Illusion

ABSTRACT

The potential influence of problematic family-of-origin patterns varies in degree and significance among pre-marital couples. Having witnessed the effects of family conflict or irresponsible parental behavior during their formative years as children, either or both partners become dispirited and feel trapped in a perceived intergenerational process destined to fail. This paper discusses clinical intervention with couples who are considering first time marriage and who report fear regarding the infiltration and eventual emergence of dysfunctional family-of-origin patterns within their own relationship. A three phase treatment program that involves disclosing fears of destiny, the promotion of skepticism, and relationship maintenance is outlined, discussed, and augmented by case vignettes.     

Empowerment Themes for Couples Therapy

SUMMARY

Empowerment is defined as a process occurring in a relational context in which all participants in the relationship interact in a manner which establishes connection and strengthens each person's sense of self worth and personal power. The purpose of the article is to apply specific themes of empowerment for couples therapy. Six major themes are presented: (1) taking and being in charge of one's self; (2) acknowledging and valuing difference and diversity; (3) power in relationship; (4) choices and options; (5) necessity of skills in relating to the wider societal context; and (6) taking action. Techniques for working with couples from an empowerment perspective are also offered.     

Relationship aggression,violence and self‐regulation in Australian newlywed couples

Research in the United States shows that relationship violence occurs in a substantial minority of newlywed couples, and is associated with a range of risk factors such as family‐of‐origin violence. Few of the associated risk factors, however, are potentially modifiable through early intervention to prevent violence. In the current study self‐reported aggression and violence were assessed in 379 Australian newlywed couples. Consistent with US‐based research, >20% of newlywed Australian couples reported at least one incident of relationship violence in the past year. A range of correlates of relationship violence and aggression was assessed, including the construct of relationship self‐regulation, which is the extent that partners report being able to enhance their relationship with their partner. Low relationship self‐regulation was correlated with relationship aggression and violence. It was concluded that the aggression and violence are common problems in Australian newlywed couples, and that enhancing relationship self‐regulation might help reduce the prevalence of aggression.     

The Impact of Relationship Education on the Couple Relationship: A Grounded Theory of Intentionality and Awareness

Research on relationship education (RE) programs generally shows their effectiveness, but it is important to understand what the mechanisms of change are, how they occur within programs, and what participants experience. The purpose of this study was to explore couples' perceptions of the key components of their experience as participants of a Prep-based RE program. Research questions included: How do couples describe their experience of taking an 8-hour relationship education class? What elements had the biggest impact on their relationship? How has their relationship changed as a result of participation? Interview data from 39 married and cohabitating couples who participated in RE were analyzed using grounded theory methods. Six categories emerged from the analytic process, resulting in a model that provided explanatory detail of a typical RE program experience and its impact on the participants. These categories were: intentionality and awareness, context, relationship, workshop, impact (of RE), and couple interview. Couples described these categories as developing in a relatively chronological order, with Intentionality and Awareness being a central category that cut across the process and helped explain the impact of the program on the couple relationship. Implications for research, program development, and program facilitators providing RE are discussed.     

When the “U” is not Inverted: Trajectories of Expressed Emotional Arousal Predict Relationship Satisfaction

Maladaptive emotional reactivity and dysfunctional communication during couple conflict are both destructive to couple functioning, and observational research has elucidated how conflict escalates. However, much of the evidence is based on measures that combine content (i.e., what was said) and the emotion with which it was said, which are then examined using sequential analyses. Despite the general presumptions about underlying emotional reactivity and escalation in negative emotions as part of relationship distress and deterioration, little empirical data are available that directly examine these continuous shifts in emotions. The current study examined concurrent and longitudinal associations between relationship satisfaction and trajectories of change in vocally expressed emotional arousal during couple conflict in 62 couples who participated in a relationship education program. Contrary to expectations and patterns found in distressed couples, trajectories followed a U‐shape rather than an inverted U‐shape curve, with steeper and more persistent decreases in emotional arousal predicting more stable relationship satisfaction over time. In addition, there were within‐couple effects. These results suggest that early signs for relationship deterioration may be less in the form of overt escalation as would be seen in distressed couples. Instead, couples who subsequently deteriorate more are less effective in calming emotional arousal. They also are less able to remain at lower emotional arousal. It is possible that the more pronounced escalation toward the end of the conversation in more at‐risk couples is a precursor of the greater escalation patterns seen in distressed couples; this should be examined empirically. Limitations and implications are discussed.     

Couple communication in stepfamilies

Effective communication is assumed to help sustain couple relationships and is a key focus of most relationship education programs. We assessed couple problem-solving communication in 65 stepfamily and 52 first-time-marrying couples, with each group stratified into high risk and low risk for relationship problems based on family-of-origin experiences. Relative to partners in first-time couples, partners in stepfamily couples were less positive, less negative, and more likely to withdraw from discussion. Risk was associated with communication in first-time but not stepfamily couples. Stepfamily couples do not exhibit the negative communication evident in high-risk first-time-marrying couples, and available relationship education programs that focus on reducing negative communication are unlikely to meet the needs of stepfamilies.     

Couples with Intimate Partner Violence Seeking Relationship Help: Associations and Implications for Self‐Help and Online Interventions

In‐person conjoint treatments for relationship distress are effective at increasing relationship satisfaction, and newly developed online programs are showing promising results. However, couples reporting even low levels intimate partner violence (IPV) are traditionally excluded from these interventions. To improve the availability of couple‐based treatment for couples with IPV, the present study sought to determine whether associations with IPV found in community samples generalized to couples seeking help for their relationship and whether web‐based interventions for relationship distressed worked equally well for couples with IPV. In the first aim, in a sample of 2,797 individuals who were seeking online help for their relationship, the levels and correlates of both low‐intensity and clinically significant IPV largely matched what is found in community samples. In the second aim, in a sample of 300 couples who were randomly assigned to a web‐based intervention or a waitlist control group, low‐impact IPV did not moderate the effects of the intervention for relationship distress. Therefore, web‐based interventions may be an effective (and easily accessible) intervention for relationship distress for couples with low‐intensity IPV.     

A couple analysis of relationship perception among couples who face work demands

This study addresses how couples experiencing work travel demands talk about their relationship. Using a sample of 29 couples who experience work travel, this study examines what couples in separate interviews reported regarding their relationship, and uses mixed‐method strategies to develop a typology of couples. Three different relationship types were uncovered: aware couples who consider a variety of aspects of themselves, their partners, their relationships, and their contexts as they discuss their lives; individually focused couples who discuss their relationship only in terms of themselves and their partners; and isolated couples who discuss their relationships void of context. These findings support the notion that couples have a degree of similarity when it comes to social cognitions of their relationships.     

The Before Baby Relationship Checkup: A Couples-Based Intervention to Reduce Relationship Risk Factors for Perinatal Mood and Anxiety Disorders

Relationship conflict and lack of partner support are risk factors for perinatal mood and anxiety disorders. An intervention to strengthen couples’ relationships before birth may reduce relationship risk factors for perinatal mood and anxiety disorders, though no research has explored this to date. The aims of this Stage 1 open-series non-experimental proof of concept study were to adapt the ‘Marriage Checkup’, an evidence-based intervention for relationship distress, as a preventative intervention for perinatal mood and anxiety disorders and to assess its feasibility and acceptability. Pregnant women receiving care at a university-based obstetric practice, and their partners, were recruited. Ten couples participated in the Before Baby Relationship Checkup, a personalized relationship health service offered in the obstetric clinic. Quantitative and qualitative data gathered suggests the intervention is feasible to implement in an obstetric setting, and acceptable to perinatal couples. Specific adaptations to the Marriage Checkup for perinatal couples are warranted and further testing is needed to evaluate efficacy.