Applying Theories of Communal Motivation to Sexuality

One important but challenging aspect of maintaining a satisfying romantic relationship is keeping the sexual spark alive. Research suggests the importance of a couple's sexual connection in the maintenance of their relationship, but sustaining high levels of desire for a partner over the course of time can be difficult. In the current review, we argue that one novel approach to understanding how couples might maintain desire and satisfaction over the course of time in their relationships is applying theories of communal motivation to the domain of sexuality. In this line of research, we have demonstrated that people high in sexual communal strength – those who are motivated to be non‐contingently responsive to their partners' sexual needs – are able to sustain higher sexual desire over the course of time and navigate sexual disagreements in a way that maintains both partners' relationship quality. Future research directions include broadening the view of sexual needs to include the need to decline or reject a partner's sexual advances and investigating how partners manage unmet sexual needs.     

Greek women's attitudes toward pregnancy,labor, and infant: Their significance for intervention

Greek women's needs, attitudes, and experiences during the months immediately prior to and subsequent to the birth of their infants were evaluated. Themes considered were women's feelings and attitudes toward pregnancy, labor and the expected infant; breast feeding; emotional and practical needs; experiences from perinatal care and relationships with medical care personnel and with the family; perceptions of physical and emotional stress; and their relationships with infant and partner. Findings showed, among others, that women emphasized a desire for more personal care — more time, continuity of care, information about their pregnancy, and less distance from the doctor. Moreover, they expressed their need for emotional support. Anxiety was found to be a central feature of women's feelings during labor and delivery. The same anxiety was related to efforts to deal with infant crying, attempts to console the infant, and concern for picking the baby up. Understanding maternal attitudes provides guidelines for designing an intervention program that would integrate emotional and cognitive factors.     

When consumers care about being treated fairly: The interaction of relationship norms and fairness norms

Prior research suggests that people assess overall fairness of an event by focusing on the distribution of the final outcome (distributive fairness) and on how they are treated by others during the conflict resolution process (interactional fairness). The primary goal of this work is to use a social relationship framework to study differences in consumers' responses to interactional fairness as revealed by their evaluations of a brand. Two types of relationships are examined—exchange relationships in which benefits are given to get something back in return; and communal relationships in which benefits are given to take care of others' needs. Results of two studies suggest that the type of consumers' relationship with the brand moderates the effect of interactional fairness such that consumers who have a communal relationship are more responsive to interactional fairness under conditions of low distributive fairness while those who have an exchange relationship are more responsive under conditions of high distributive fairness.     

Desirability of control: psychometric properties and relationships with locus of control,personality, coping,and mental and somatic complaints in three Dutch samples

Desire for control (DC) or need for control has frequently been proposed as an important personality characteristic and as a possible crucial moderator within the fields of achievement, psychological adaptation, stress, and health. However, unlike locus of control, hardly any effort has been undertaken to assess the construct. An exception is the work of Burger and Cooper on the Desirability of Control Scale ( 1979 ). In the present study, the psychometric properties of a Dutch version of the DC scale were tested in three different samples (total N = 1044). Furthermore, relationships between DC, its subscales, and various psychological personality and outcome measures were examined. The results show that the psychometric properties of the original DC scale could be successfully transposed to the Dutch version. Furthermore, factor analyses (PCA) led to the construction of three reliable subscales: ‘control others’ (desire to be in charge of and control others), ‘control self’ (desire to control one's own life), and ‘relinquish control’ (desire to leave others in control). The pattern of relationships with convergent and outcome variables supports the interpretation of these subscales. For ‘control others’, as for the total DC scale (i.e. a total of all 20 items), the emphasis of these relationships was on dominance, active coping, and psychological adjustment. ‘Control self’ was mainly related to self‐sufficiency and independence, while ‘relinquish control’ was clearly associated with passive coping and poor psychological adjustment. In summary, the DC scale appears to be a psychometrically sound instrument to assess desire for control and its subdimensions. Copyright © 2002 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.     

The need to belong and self‐disclosure in positive word‐of‐mouth behaviours: The moderating effect of self–brand connection

Word of mouth (WOM) is an important information source for consumers. Nowadays, many consumers promote and spread the word about their preferred brands, thereby influencing others' attitudes and behaviours. Based on a social behaviour perspective and the need to belong theory, this research proposes that the individual's need to belong and the individual's level of self‐disclosure increase their probability of engaging in positive WOM behaviour. The moderating role of self–brand connection in the aforementioned relationships is also analysed. In the study conducted, users of a well‐known baby food brand (n = 851) were surveyed. The results revealed that the individuals' need to belong fostered the desire to talk to others about their preferred brand. A negative moderating effect of self–brand connection was also observed. As the connection with the brand is lower, the motivation to engage in positive WOM will be more related to personal characteristics, such as their need to belong and level of self‐disclosure. Copyright © 2015 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.     

Relationship‐based intervention with at‐risk mothers: Factors affecting variations in outcome

A previous group comparison had shown that in families experiencing the UCLA Family Development Project intervention as opposed to a group that did not, mothers became more responsive to the needs of their infants, and the infants were more secure in their attachment to their mothers. The present study asks whether variations in these outcomes following participation in a relationally based intervention are anticipated by maternal involvement in the intervention, partner support, personality dimensions, and mother–infant interactions that were assessed early in the intervention process. The sample consists of 46 mothers at risk for inadequate parenting who also were poor and generally lacked support. It was found that variations at 12 months of age in the child's secure response to separation, his or her expectation of being cared for (felt security), and the mother's responsiveness to need are anticipated by variations in the mother's 6‐ to 12‐month involvement in the home‐visiting intervention, the quality of her partner's support as measured at six months, and her own trust, ability to form stable relationships, and lack of self doubt. Parents who, at one month, were responsive to the needs of their more soothable babies were more likely to have secure children at 12 months, but these associations were not as robust as those summarized above. © 2000 Michigan Association for Infant Mental Health.     

Perceiving and Wanting to Be Valued by Others: Implications for Cognition,Motivation, and Behavior in Romantic Relationships

Two studies examined implications of two individual differences—perception of being valued by others and desire to be valued by others—for romantic relationships. Study 1 included 171 participants involved in romantic relationships (59 males, 112 females) and examined attributions and behavioral intentions in hypothetical scenarios. Study 2 involved 160 heterosexual couples who completed daily reports and/or an observed conflict discussion. Perception of being valued by others and desire to be valued by others independently predicted more pro‐relationship responses and reduced relationship‐destructive responses, including more care, commitment, and regard for partners; more responsive and ingratiating behavior; less negative behavior; and more positive perceptions and behavioral intentions. Perceived and desired interpersonal value were related to attachment anxiety, attachment avoidance, and trait self‐esteem. However, perceived and desired interpersonal value were superior predictors of relationship outcomes, even in replications of foundational attachment studies. Individual differences in believing that one is valued by others and wanting to be valued by others independently predict relationship maintenance, and these dimensions may be at the core of many effects of attachment dimensions and self‐esteem. These individual differences appear to be important aspects of personality that guide cognition, motivation, and behavior in interpersonal relationships.     

A communal approach to sexual need responsiveness in romantic relationships

ABSTRACT

Sex is a crucial factor that impacts the quality and stability of relationships, yet many couples report recurrent sexual issues – such as discrepancies in their desired sexual frequency or levels of sexual desire – that detract from their relationship quality. This article describes how applying the theory of communal motivation from relationship science to the sexual domain of relationships can shed light onto understanding how couples can maintain desire over time, remain satisfied in the face of conflicting sexual interests, and decline one another’s sexual advances in ways that protect their relationship. We integrate a decade of research on communal motivation, sexual rejection, and responses to sexual rejection to provide a better, and more holistic, understanding of how partners can successfully balance their sexual needs to ultimately reap the powerful rewards of a fulfiling sexual connection.     

The generalized sense of power is a psychological resource: Evidence from a disaster response field training exercise

We examined whether the generalized sense of power—the belief that one is able to influence others in one's various social relationships—serves as a psychological resource that enables leadership in high-stakes, unfamiliar group challenges, such as emergencies or crises. We studied current and prospective humanitarian aid professionals (N = 180) during a major field training exercise: a three-day, immersive simulated humanitarian crisis. Individuals who entered the simulated crisis with a greater sense of power in their social relationships experienced lower stress (anxiety), behaved more assertively, and left the simulation with a relatively heightened desire to lead, despite not being deemed better leaders by their teammates. Lacking an initial sense of power was associated with experiences (e.g., feeling timid) that undermined the desire to lead. These results suggest that the psychological sense of power is a key leadership resource, without which one may be at risk of self-selecting out of leadership.     

The Analyst's Necessary Vertigo

The euphemistic phrase “the difficult to reach patient” often refers to work with patients who have serious difficulties relating. The author examines the basic construct of “reach,” its pitfalls, and potentials. In the author's view, often we are talking about patients who do not fully experience their own subjective existence or the existence of others. This requires unusual efforts to “reach” the patient in order for the patient to consolidate a sense of self and other, creating the possibility of reflective relating. In contrast to views that see such psychoanalytic “reach” as associated primarily with the analyst's needs or pathology, the author views the analyst's extraordinary efforts as responsive to the patient's need to move the analyst into the foundations of the analyst's own being.     

When does anger evoke self‐interest and fairness motives? The moderating effects of perceived responsibility for needs

Research has repeatedly demonstrated that anger evokes both self‐interest and fairness motives, but it is unclear what factors determine the evocation of these motives. We examined the idea that the type of relationship, indexed by the perceived responsibility for a partner's needs, moderates the effect of anger on self‐interest and fairness motives by constructing the following hypotheses: Participants will be motivated to protect their self‐interests when they feel anger toward an other who they perceive has the responsibility for needs, while this will not be the case when they feel anger toward an other who they do not perceive has a responsibility for needs (Hypothesis 1), and participants will be motivated to restore fairness regardless of whether the target of anger has a responsibility for needs or not (Hypothesis 2). The Japanese participants in this study rated their anger experiences in terms of the intensity of angry feelings, the perception of responsibility of the other for their own needs, the closeness of the relationship prior to the experience of anger, and the motives that were evoked. Regression analysis supported both hypotheses, implying that concerns related to self‐interest in close relationships reflect the desire for the maintenance of these relationships.     

Conflicting desire and the child's theory of mind

We contrast the standard representational theory-of-mind approach to the understanding of mental states with an alternative view that theory-of-mind tasks require executive functioning or the inhibition of more “cognitively salient” information. Two experiments test the hypothesis that 3-year-olds' apparent problems on theory-of-mind tasks are not due to an inability to represent the mental contents of another, but rather lie in the informational structure of the task. In Experiment 1, 3- to 5-year-olds were tested on their understanding of desire in others either when they themselves held a strong and conflicting desire or when they had no strong desire. Results showed that under the condition of having a strong and conflicting desire, only 5-year-olds were able to recognize that another person may desire something different. In contrast, when the children themselves held no strong desire, even 3-year-olds were able to judge another's desire correctly. Experiment 2 compared 3-year-olds' performance on a standard false-belief task with an equivalently structured desire task in which participants had again to inhibit their own strong and conflicting desire. Results showed similar performance on the traditional false-belief task and the new conflicting-desire task.     

How partner‐satisfying decisions benefit relationships: An experience sampling study

Sometimes, individuals must choose between acting in a way that satisfies their own desire or acting in a way that satisfies their partner's desire. What are the consequences of choosing one over the other for individuals' well‐being and relationship? Using experience sampling data (934 reports by 106 participants) that assessed daily decision conflicts in relationships, we examined consequences of partner‐satisfying decisions. A higher proportion of partner‐satisfying decisions predicted more perceived needs fulfillment and marginally higher perceived relationship quality over the course of a week. Additionally, immediately after the partner‐satisfying decision, participants reported feeling closer to their partner, and reported more positive and less negative affect, even when controlling for the quality of the relationship.     

Awareness and authoring: the idea of self in mindfulness and narrative therapy

The author argues that relations between addicts and others are dominated by untruth. Lying is explored with regards to its origin in the primordial desire for love, while it is argued that the addict regards every question posed to them as a question about their lovability. The place of deception in Twelve-Step Fellowship movement is noted and it is also argued that the latter's notion of ‘rock bottom’ can be understood existentially as that place where truth cannot be denied. It is further argued that addiction itself is a form of untruth, which distorts or destroys the ambiguous lived tension of existence. This form of relating leads to the destruction of self-esteem, the development of shame and distrust and the breakdown of relationships. Truth is replaced by false narratives that are individualistic and alienating. Instead of ‘dwelling in truth’, the addict instrumentally alters their moods to suit their own needs. The addict escapes from this position by hitting ‘rock bottom’, accepting the process of truth and by opening up to the other. These notions are relayed through an exploration of phenomenological theorists and a grounded example.     

The relational-interdependent self-construal and relationships

Three studies describe the development and validation of a measure of the relational-interdependent self-construal, which is defined as the tendency to think of oneself in terms of relationships with close others. Study 1 reports the development, psychometric properties, and tests of validity of this new measure. Individuals who scored high on the Relational-Interdependent Self-Construal (RISC) Scale characterized their important relationships as closer and more committed than did individuals who scored low on this measure (Study 1) and were more likely to take into account the needs and wishes of others when making decisions (Study 2). In Study 3, using a dyadic interaction paradigm with previously unacquainted participants, the partners of persons who scored high on the RISC scale viewed them as open and responsive to their needs and concerns; these perceptions were related to positive evaluations of the relationship.     

The Changing Role of Fatherhood: The Father as a Provider of Selfobject Functions

Fatherhood is evolving. The way that men carry out their paternal role is reflective of the historical time era in which they live, social and cultural forces, both the mother and the father's expectations for fathering behaviors, as well as the father's own innate capabilities, wishes, and desires. Fatherhood is also greatly influenced by men's relationships with their own fathers, the quality of that relationship, and the extent to which the father was emotionally available. The ever-changing role of fathers has been a challenge for the psychoanalytic literature. There is no comprehensive theoretical body of knowledge about fatherhood that takes into account the changing nature of fathering, especially considering men's desires to be emotionally responsive and nurturing parents. This article examines the changing role of the father and suggests a model of paternal involvement that expands the nurturing and available father role to include the father as a selfobject. It discusses the importance of understanding men's relationships with their fathers, a central dynamic in shaping fathers’ involvement with their children. The residual impact of paternal deprivation is explored, followed by two clinical vignettes that symbolize the search for missing selfobject functions. This article concludes by outlining clinical implications and questions to pose to assess the selfobject relationship with one's father.     

Reassuring sex: Can sexual desire and intimacy reduce relationship‐specific attachment insecurities?

Past research has shown that attachment orientations shape sexual processes within relationships. Yet, little has been done to explore the opposite direction. In the present research, we examined whether sexual desire and emotional intimacy reduce attachment insecurities over time in emerging relationships. In an 8‐month longitudinal study, we followed 62 newly dating couples across three measurement waves. At Time 1, romantic partners discussed sexual aspects of their relationship and judges coded their displays of sexual desire and intimacy. Participants also completed measures of relationship‐specific attachment anxiety and avoidance in each wave. The results indicated that men's displays of desire predicted a decline in their own and their partner's relationship‐specific insecurities. Conversely, women's displays of desire inhibited the decline in their partner's relationship‐specific insecurities, whereas women's displays of intimacy predicted a decline in their partner's relationship‐specific insecurities. These findings suggest that different sex‐related processes underlie attachment formation in men and women.     

Moral Responsibility and Tourette Syndrome1

Philosophers generally assume that individuals with Tourette syndrome are not responsible for their Tourettic tics, and so not blameworthy for any harm their tics might cause. Yet this assumption is based largely on ignorance of the lived experience of Tourette syndrome. Individuals with Tourette syndrome often experience their tics as freely chosen and reason‐responsive. Yet it still seems wrong to treat a Tourettic individual's tic as on a moral par with others’ actions. In this paper, I examine the options and argue that, if this is correct, then a surprising consequence follows: the standard, motivation‐based theory of desire must be false. I go on to argue that, given what is known about the neurological basis of Tourette syndrome, this is a reasonable conclusion to draw.     

Together in Need: Relational Selfhood,Vulnerability to Harm,and Enriching Attachments

Connections between one's own welfare and that of others abound if we pause to look for them, although philosophical theories of selfhood have only very recently begun to incorporate these connections. This essay draws on recent work on need to argue that one of the strongest expressions of these connections is to be found in the relational needs that they can generate. While paying heed to needs that arise from the relational nature of selfhood at large, this essay pays particular attention to what I call “transpersonal needs”: needs that occur when one's experience of the needs of others gives rise to certain needs of one's own. I argue that the best criterion for defining need is vulnerability to harm, but this does not mean that having a need is something that is purely harmful. Having certain needs can also enrich one's life. Further, while every need entails a corresponding vulnerability to harm, some of these potential harms are more detrimental to one's welfare than others, with some relational needs standing among those that can result in the greatest harm if unanswered.     

Changing Relationship Growth Belief: Intrapersonal and Interpersonal Consequences of Compassionate Goals

The belief that difficulties can lead to growth in relationships, or growth belief, has consequences for relationships (e.g., C. R. Knee, 1998 ). But what predicts change in this belief? The current study hypothesized that compassionate goals to support others ( J. Crocker & A. Canevello, 2008 ) predict increased growth belief through increased need satisfaction. In Study 1, 199 college freshmen reported their friendship growth belief and goals. In Study 2, 65 roommate pairs reported their roommate growth belief, goals, and need satisfaction. Across studies, compassionate goals predicted increased growth belief. In Study 2, goals predicted increased perceived mutual need satisfaction, which predicted increased growth belief. Additionally, partners' compassionate goals predicted actors' increased growth belief. Results suggest that growth beliefs are shaped by goals—own and others'.