Social anxiety and self-protective communication style in close relationships

People with higher social anxiety tend to reveal less information about themselves in interactions with strangers, and this appears to be part of a self-protective strategy adopted in situations in which the risk of negative evaluation is judged to be particularly high. This research examined whether a similar style of communication may be adopted by people with higher social anxiety in their close relationships, and whether it may be associated with decrements in the quality (support, depth, conflict) of these relationships. Over 300 people from the community completed a series of online questionnaires measuring social anxiety and depression, and disclosure in and quality of their close friendships and romantic relationships. After controlling for levels of depression, social anxiety was associated with a paucity of disclosure in both romantic relationships and close friendships in females, but not males. There was an indirect association between higher social anxiety and lower relationship quality (lower support, with a trend towards greater conflict) via lower self-disclosure in women's romantic relationships, but not their close friendships. Addressing disclosure in the context of close relationships may assist socially anxious women to develop more fulfilling and harmonious close relationships.     

亲密关系中的自我扩张

自我扩张理论认为, 人们通过将他人的资源、观点和认同纳入自我来实现自我扩张, 增强完成目标的效能感。该理论作为动机领域的新热点, 研究多以亲密关系为背景。现有研究主要采用实验法和问卷法, 以自我扩张动机和将他人纳入自我为基点展开, 内容涉及择偶、关系质量、不忠、关系破裂和维持等方面。未来研究需进一步考察不同亲密关系类型、关系与非关系中自我扩张的运作机制, 以及亲密关系双方自我扩张的相互作用。     

Positive illusion in close relationships

The literature regarding self-other comparisons suggests that self-enhancing perceptions are prevalent, including forms of “illusion” such as excessively positive self-evaluation, unrealistic optimism, and exaggerated perceptions of control. Concepts from optimal distinctiveness theory served as the basis for two experiments examining whether illusion functions similarly when the context of evaluation involves a relationship. In both experiments participants rated themselves, the best friend, and the average other—or their own romantic relationships, the best friend's relationship, and the relationship of the average other–using scales measuring positivity of evaluation, optimism regarding the future, and perceptions of control. In both experiments, participants exhibited centrality-based differentiation, rating targets more favorably to the degree that the target was more central to their social identity. Patterns of differentiation differed for the two contexts: In the individual context, participants differentiated themselves and their friends from the average other. In the relationship context, participants differentiated their own relationships from the relationships of friends and average others. Also, participants rated individuals as more controllable than relationships. Participants in Experiment 2 provided information regarding potential predictors of illusion. Analyses of these data suggest that favorable centrality-based differentiation may be partially accounted for by impression management, global self-esteem (particularly in the individual context), and commitment level (particularly in the relationship context).     

Attitude alignment in close relationships

On the basis of principles of balance theory and interdependence theory, this research examined a phenomenon termed attitude alignment, or the tendency of interacting partners to modify their attitudes in such a manner as to achieve attitudinal congruence. The results of three experiments generally were consistent with the proposed model. First, tendencies toward attitude alignment were greater to the extent that attitudinal discrepancies were salient. Second, alignment tendencies were greater to the extent that an issue was central to the partner; there was also evidence that the degree to which an issue was peripheral to the self affected alignment processes (e.g., for changes in centrality of issue, with regard to persuasion methods). Third, degree of alignment tended to be greater in dating-partner interactions than in stranger interactions and tended to be greater among couples with high adjustment than among those with low adjustment.     

Self-monitoring and close relationships

Three types of close relationships have received attention from theorists and researchers interested in self-monitoring: friendships, romantic relationships, and marriage. Our review of this literature was organized around three phases of relationships: initiation, maintenance, and dissolution. Across the three types of relationships, consistent differences between high self-monitors and low self-monitors emerged concerning the structure of their social relationships (segmented vs. integrated), the basis for choosing friends and romantic partners (activity-based vs. person-based), and the orientation taken to romantic and marital partners (uncommitted vs. committed). Across all three types of relationships, however, little is known about the processes and consequences involved in the dissolution of close relationships for high self-monitors and low self-monitors. Relatively little is also known about the processes used by high self-monitors and low self-monitors to maintain their friendships and marriages. In addition to addressing these deficiencies in the literature, theorists and researchers interested in self-monitoring and close relationships need to develop sophisticated, causal models that can account for (a) interaction exchanges in the relationships, (b) dyadic as well as individual levels of analysis, and (c) temporal and situational changes in the course of close relationships.     

Daily supportive equity in close relationships

Receiving support in committed relationships has frequently been associated with negative psychological outcomes in the recipient, such as increased distress. The authors hypothesized that these negative effects could be offset by support recipients' reciprocation of support, that is, by creating a sense of supportive equity. To investigate this hypothesis, the authors obtained daily reports of mood and of received and given emotional support from both partners in 85 couples throughout a 4-week period. Reciprocity in support transactions was associated with higher levels of positive mood and lower levels of negative mood. In line with previous research, receiving support without reciprocation was associated with increases in negative mood. Giving support, regardless of receipt, was associated with a decrease in negative mood.     

Transactive memory in close relationships.

Memory performance of 118 individuals who had been in close dating relationships for at least 3 months was studied. For a memory task ostensibly to be performed by pairs, some Ss were paired with their partners and some were paired with an opposite-sex partner from another couple. For some pairs a memory structure was assigned (e.g., 1 partner should remember food items, another should remember history items, etc.), whereas for others no structure was mentioned. Pairs studied together without communication, and recall was tested in individuals. Memory performance of the natural pairs was better than that of impromptu pairs without assigned structure, whereas the performance of natural pairs was inferior to that of impromptu pairs when structure was assigned.     

Strategies of influence in close relationships

In this study, we examined how close relationship partners spontaneously influence each other while they discussed an existing problem in their relationship. According to theories of social influence, people in important, self-defining relationships should experience the relationship itself as a potent source of influence. Thus, they are likely to rely on the relationship as a source of power and to use influence strategies that reference relationship norms and values. Consistent with this reasoning, dating partners who were subjectively closer to their partners/relationships were more likely to reference the relationship in their influence attempts than those who were less subjectively close. Furthermore, referencing the relationship was an effective influence strategy. Greater referencing was associated with opinion shifts during discussions for both agents and targets of influence, with each compromising toward the other's position. In contrast, greater use of negative coercion as an influence strategy (e.g., derogation of the partner or punishment) was associated with less compromise.     

Trust and partner-enhancing attributions in close relationships

A cross-lagged panel design was used to examine the links between trust and attributional processes in a sample of 75 married couples throughout a period of 2 years. During the first phase of the study, participants completed a measure of marital trust, engaged in a laboratory problem-solving discussion of a recurrent conflict-related issue, and then rated their partner's behavior and motives. Approximately 2 years later, 54 couples were again contacted and measures of trust were obtained. Forty of these couples also viewed a videotape of their laboratory problem-solving discussion from 2 years previously and rated their partner's behavior and motives. Results suggested a reciprocal causal pattern by which partner-enhancing attributions predict changes in trust and trust predicts changes in partner-enhancing attributions.     

Trust and communicated attributions in close relationships

The attributional statements intimate partners communicate to one another were examined as a function of trust. In discussions by 35 married couples, 850 attributions and corresponding events were coded on dimensions of valence, globality, and locus. Results of regression and contingency analyses indicate that attributional statements expressed in high-trust relationships emphasized positive aspects of the relationship. Medium-trust couples actively engaged issues but focused more on negative events and explanations. Low-trust couples expressed more specific, less affectively extreme attributional statements that minimized the potential for increased conflict. Results could not be accounted for by relationship satisfaction. These findings also highlight the importance of focusing on features of the events for which attributions are expressed.     

Toward the analysis of close relationships

Two central questions are addressed: (1) How does one distinguish among relationships differing in closeness at any single point in time? (2) How do relationships change over either a short or a long time span? The first question suggests looking inside the Person-Other “intersection.” Findings from several empirical studies are described. The second question leads to discussions of short-term and long-term temporal processes. Regarding long-term pair processes, it is proposed that research can be stimulated by recognizing a five-phase sequence which extends from (a) initial attraction, to (b) building a relationship, (c) continuation, (d) deterioration, and (e) ending; transitions between adjacent phases are considered. The importance of theoretical models is emphasized throughout.     

Push-you-pull-you: the boundaried self in close relationships

Based on Amoebic Self Theory, the authors propose that the salience of different threats to the self affects the extent to which an intimate relationship partner is pushed away (excluded) or pulled closer (included). When social threat is salient among persons in relationships, it is hypothesized that partners will attempt to defuse the resulting sense of interpersonal vulnerability: offending partners may be pushed away, whereas offenders themselves may draw closer. When spatial-symbolic threat is salient and the relationship's capacity to function as an identity marker is jeopardized, it is hypothesized that the partner--regardless of his or her role--will be pulled closer to maintain the perception that the relationship is secure. Self-report responses to hypothetical scenarios and perceptions of behaviors during a role-play were generally consistent with these hypotheses, suggesting that both an intimate partner and the relationship with that partner can be incorporated into the self.     

Understanding in close relationships: An interpersonal approach

Understanding plays a cardinal role in relationships. People desire and need to understand their relationship partners and, importantly, they need to feel understood by others in daily life. In this chapter we suggest that these needs are reflected in people's need to know and be known by others (understanding as knowledge) and their desire to be responsive to others' needs and experience others as responsive to their needs (understanding as responsiveness). We review empirical findings showing that a lack of understanding has important ill-effects and that the presence of understanding has a multitude of beneficial effects for people in relationships, both for their personal and relational well-being.     

Romantic love and sexual desire in close relationships

Drawing on recent claims in the study of relationships, attachment, and emotion, the authors hypothesized that romantic love serves a commitment-related function and sexual desire a reproduction-related function. Consistent with these claims, in Study 1, brief experiences of romantic love and sexual desire observed in a 3-min interaction between romantic partners were related to distinct feeling states, distinct nonverbal displays, and commitment- and reproductive-related relationship outcomes, respectively. In Study 2, the nonverbal display of romantic love was related to the release of oxytocin. Discussion focuses on the place of romantic love and sexual desire in the literature on emotion.     

Predictors of satisfaction in geographically close and long-distance relationships

In this study, the authors examined geographically close (GCRs) and long-distance (LDRs) romantic relationship satisfaction as explained by insecure attachment, self-disclosure, gossip, and idealization. After college student participants (N = 536) completed a Web survey, structural equation modeling (SEM) multigroup analysis revealed that the GCR and LDR models were nonequivalent, as expected. Self-disclosure mediated the insecure attachment-idealization path differently in GCRs and in LDRs. Self-disclosure was positively associated with idealization in GCRs and negatively associated with idealization in LDRs, with the insecure attachment-idealization and the insecure attachment-satisfaction paths negative for both GCRs and LDRs. Furthermore, the insecure attachment-idealization path was stronger than the mediated path, especially for LDRs; the insecure attachment-satisfaction path was stronger than the mediation model for GCRs and LDRs. In other words, the GCR and LDR models differed despite some similarities. For both, with higher insecure (i.e., anxious and avoidant) attachment, the person discloses less to the partner, idealizes the partner less, and is less satisfied with the relationship. Also, people who idealize are more satisfied. In contrast, in LDRs only, with higher insecure attachment, the people tend to gossip more. With higher insecure attachment and with higher self-disclosure, people idealize more in GCRs but idealize less in LDRs. Overall, attachment insecurity explained more idealization and satisfaction in LDRs than in GCRs. Implications are discussed.     

Violence in close relationships: The role of emotion

Violence in dating, cohabiting, and marital relationships is examined in terms of emotion-related vulnerabilities. A systems-oriented theoretical framework is offered to explain the role that emotions play in common, less severe forms of violent couple interactions and in severe violent couple interactions. Emotions playing a protective role in close relationships are contrasted with emotions serving to enhance risk for couple violence.     

Decoding affective communication in intimate relationships

Situational and personality variables influencing the accurate understanding of partners' communications in intimate couples were studied. The situation was varied by inducing either partner-focused or self-focused attention. The personality variables were gender-role attitudes, control orientation, and empathy. Thirty couples who had been living together for at least 12 months discussed an issue which was important to both partners. Afterwards, each selected their partner's most ‘important’ statement from their videotaped discussion. The two statements were then rated by each of the partners in respect of their own and their partner's emotional reaction to them (intentionally sent and actually experienced emotions). Analyses of variance with correctness of decoding as a dependent variable demonstrated strong effects of other-focused attention and gender as independent variables. Femininity and secondary control correlated positively with correct decoding. These results are interpreted in a theoretical framework of empathy and communication.     

Constructing intergroup relationships in social communication

Abstract:  People communicate with each other about their ingroup and outgroup in a social context. These social communications may have profound effects in constructing intergroup relationships. In this paper, we outline how different combinations of the social identities of the sender, receiver, and target of the social communication may give rise to differing face concerns of the ingroup and outgroup, and may result in different patterns of communications about them. People may enhance or protect their ingroup social identity, and derogate the outgroup social identity to their ingroup audiences; however, they are more likely to enhance and protect their outgroup's social identity when communicating with outgroup audiences. Two studies tested these predictions. Study 1 used real groups of Australian and Asian students communicating about an Asian student in an Australian university context. In Study 2, participants assigned to two fictitious groups communicated about their ingroup and outgroup. In both studies, the findings were interpreted within the framework of intergroup communication, although there were some notable deviations from the predictions. Future directions of the research were also discussed.     

Approach motivation and the expansion of self in close relationships

The self‐expansion model posits that individuals are fundamentally motivated to expand their sense of self. It is proposed that approach—but not avoidance—motivation underlies self‐expansion and that approach‐motivated individuals should be especially interested in self‐expanding with a person who provides many novel resources, identities, and perspectives. In Studies 1, 2a, and 2b, correlational evidence that self‐expansion is associated with both relationship‐specific and global measures of approach motivation, but is unrelated to avoidance motivation, was found. In Study 3, experimental evidence that approach motivation increases sensitivity to self‐expansion opportunities, such that individuals high in approach motivation are especially attracted to targets who offer many expansion opportunities and unattracted to targets who offer few expansion opportunities was found. Taken together, these studies provide evidence that self‐expansion is rooted in approach motivation.