Abstract: | There are a great many useful articles on the dynamics and pragmatics of reflecting teams but few articles address what constitutes a good or inept reflection and why. I provide a conceptual model for thinking about what a good reflection does, distinguishing it from a nice reflection. With some further refinements in place, I then illustrate how reflections can be part of any relationship, not just clinical ones. We have opportunities to make them and to recognize when others make them to us. By using examples from my personal life—as a grandmother, daughter, radio listener, cancer survivor, and client—I attempt to ease the personal/professional binary, a project of mine for the last 35 years. In the second part of the article, I address how writing can serve reflection. Although best offered at the moment one is called for, it is never too late for a reflection. Writing allows people to offer reflections after the fact to those who have shared their stories. Sometimes, it is to ourselves we offer those reflections, when the reflector has long since dropped the thread of obligation or interest. I provide an example of working with iconic imagery to unpack meaning so that reflection can eventually take place, allowing integration to proceed, facilitating the strange becoming the familiar. |